Marriage Is Movement

Written by Dorothy Brown

Are you still seeking to get to know your spouse better? Tell us about it on the blog today: http://talk.thelife.com/2006/06/01/marriage-is-movement

?Behold, I am coming soon!? (Revelation 22:12)

Lisa and I went to see the movie ?Seabiscuit? with Rob and Jill, two of our closest friends. At the start of the movie, I sat by Rob and Lisa sat by Jill, so that Lisa and Jill could share some unbuttered popcorn and Rob and I could assault our arteries with the buttered kind. But halfway through the movie, Lisa had to get up for a moment, and Rob slipped over to sit by his wife.

There was something wonderfully refreshing in seeing a man who has been married for eighteen years still eager to sit by his wife for the last hour of a movie. That simple movement said a great deal about Rob and Jill?s marriage, and it personifies a biblical truth.

I heard of one wedding in which the bridegroom actually walked down the aisle instead of the bride, in order to capture the biblical picture of Christ ? the bridegroom ? going to his bride, the church. As Christ pursues the church, so the husband is to pursue his wife. (Note to future husbands: it?s rare the woman indeed who would even consider giving up that famous walk down the aisle; I wouldn?t recommend trying this at home!)

Marriage is more than a commitment; it is a movement toward someone. Husbands, are you still moving toward your wife? Or have you settled in, assuming you know her as well as she can be known, and thus turning your sights to other discoveries and challenges? Even worse, are you violating your vows with the ?silent treatment? or a refusal to communicate?

Wives, are you moving toward your husband? Are you still pursuing him, seeking to get to know him, trying to draw closer to him? Have you considered new ways to please and pleasure him, or have you become stagnant in judgment, falling back to see if he?ll come after you?

Jesus moves towards us even in our sin; will we move toward our spouses even in theirs?

Movement is about more than communication; it?s about the force of our wills. Are we choosing to pursue greater intimacy in our relationship? Do we seek to resolve conflict, or do we push it aside, assuming ?it?s not worth the hassle? while letting our love grow colder? Are we still trying to understand our spouses? worlds ? their temptations and trials, their frustrations and challenges ? or are we too consumed with our own? Are we praying for our spouses, encouraging them to grow in grace and holiness, or are we tearing them down behind their backs, gossiping about them so everyone will feel sorry for how difficult we have it?

Honestly ask yourself, ?Do I know my spouse any better today than I did three years ago?? If not, maybe you?ve stopped moving toward your spouse. And if you?ve stopped moving toward your spouse, you?ve stopped being married in the fully biblical sense of the word.

This week, why not launch yourself on a new exploration ? your spouse? Why not see what new things you can learn ? how you can grow even closer to each other, how you can give up a little more independence and embrace a little more interdependence? Why not make a renewed attempt to study your spouse every bit as much as a biology student studies the movement of cells under a microscope or a seminary student pores over thick reference books late into the night?

So many people say the ?excitement? has left their marriage. Well, exploration is one of the most exciting journeys known to humankind. Most of the globe has been mapped, many times over ? but that person who wears your ring? There are still secrets yet unknown and yet to be explored on that side of the bed.

Get busy.

About the Author: This devotional was written by Gary L. Thomas. Learn more about Gary: http://www.tmdevotionals.com/women/authors/gary-thomas/

Related Reading
How to write a love letter

http://www.mentodayonline.com/loveandsex/writeloveletter.html

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3 Responses to “Marriage Is Movement”

  • Norm says:

    Right on Bob!! Although we have not been married as long as you (46 years), we have discovered that love involves the total person not just a few aspects that are attractive to us. We have can have disagreements without feeling that our relationship is threatened. When Jesus said, “Love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthjew 19:19), I’m sure he had our spouses in mind. When you really love your spouse you love yourself and the benefits are soooo incredible!!! I don’t think couples fall out of love. They fall out of commitment, or as Gary Thomas says, they fall out of movement toward each other.

  • Sheldon Kotyk says:

    Wow, that\’s amazing to hear Bob. As someone who has just been married for 3 years, it\’s important to hear about the important things in marriage.

  • Robert Leonard says:

    Gloria and me have been married for 57 years. Each new
    day is still an experience. Our marriage started out with
    a strain. We were married two weeks and I shipped out to
    the Pacific for two and one half years. I will never forget
    that 4 of July when I saw her at the train depot standing
    there. I don’T think I ever moved so fast in all my life.

    We have always been true to each other. We have grown in
    our love each day. I have always found the secret is in
    caring more about your partner than you do yourself.

    In 1996 I was diagnoised with Postate Cancer. When we were
    given the news we were given my three choices. We decided
    on the surgery. Please note I said WE. Of course the
    surgery left me impotent. But I tell you that has never
    been a problem. After ten years we are still together and
    our life together is perfect. We love each other and that
    is what is important. Had I not chosen the surgery I
    would have had about a year to live. People who feel that
    love is primarly sex are fooling themselves. It is really
    being together, sharing life each day. I could sit for
    hours and just look at her and be fulfilled. When we met
    in 1945, I knew that first day I was going to marry her
    and that our life together would be forever.

    Now as we draw closer to those final years we are more in
    love than ever. There are times when I see her looking at
    me and I am filled with so much love. Our marriage and life
    together has always be the three of us. God, Gloria and me.

    Bob L.

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