Are Some Marriages Unfixable?
There’s been a lot of news lately about Sandra Bullock and her husband Jesse James. It saddens me that they are just the latest in a long, long line of celebrities who have had to live their marital issues in pubic. I know that it is part of being famous, but it seems especially cruel to have your heartache splashed across the glossy pages of a magazine.
As I see these couples deal with their private struggles publically, I wonder if the chances of them surviving would be greater if they were able to do the work of trying to save the marriage privately. It can be easy to look at marriages where there has been infidelity or addiction or even another child and think “that cannot be saved” or even “that should not be saved” but sometimes, if both parties are sincere impossible situations can be healed.
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Let me stop here to say that I am not referring to abusive marriages. I do believe that marriage is sacred and I do believe that sometimes abusers can change but I think that the safety of the individual has to come first. In those cases, it may simply not be possible or safe or wise for the couple to stay together. But that’s the exception to the rule. Sometimes we give up too quickly.
In her article, “Absolute Forgiveness” Jean Blackmer tells the story of Sue & Dave, a couple who felt their marriage was beyond repair. Dave was drinking heavily and the effects of his behavior were spilling out all over their family. But something happened that changed everything. You’ll have to read the article to see for yourself.
Have you ever felt that your marriage was beyond saving? Hundred of couples have attending Family Life Weekend to Remember conferences and found the tools and counseling they need to build a marriage worth fighting for. One couple who attended said:
“This conference saved our marriage! It has given us hope that we can work through our issues, that they are not insurmountable! We came to the sessions feeling overwhelmed with life and our burdens/issues, and have left feeling free, the weight lifted off our shoulders because we now know how to fix our marriage. We will make it, thank you!!”
Upcoming conferences in the US and conferences in Canada are listed online. Try one, I promise you won’t regret it. Have you been to a Weekend To Remember conference? Tell us what you thought of it.
