Almost Christian
We know that the college years can be a time when young people walk away from their faith, but what about the teen years? A recent survey of teens and faith – the National Study of Youth and Religion – has some results that might surprise you.
In a recent article for CNN, Kenda Creasy Dean, a professor at Princeton Theological Seminary, author of the book Almost Christian, and one of the researchers on the study found that, “American teenagers are embracing what she calls ‘moralistic therapeutic deism.’ Translation: It’s a watered-down faith that portrays God as a “divine therapist” whose chief goal is to boost people’s self-esteem.”
Life Lesson: Time management
Are you still growing spiritually?: Check your compass and let God lead you
Teens unable to articulate faith
According to the article:
The study, which included in-depth interviews with at least 3,300 American teenagers between 13 and 17, found that most American teens who called themselves Christian were indifferent and inarticulate about their faith.
The study included Christians of all stripes — from Catholics to Protestants of both conservative and liberal denominations. Though three out of four American teenagers claim to be Christian, fewer than half practice their faith, only half deem it important, and most can’t talk coherently about their beliefs, the study found.
Many teenagers thought that God simply wanted them to feel good and do good — what the study’s researchers called “moralistic therapeutic deism.
Dean goes on to say that, “If this is the God they’re seeing in church, they are right to leave us in the dust,” Dean says. “Churches don’t give them enough to be passionate about.”
What about the teens in your life? Are we sending our kids off to college with what Blue Like Jazz author Donald Miller describes as a “vending machine God”?
It can be tempting to assume that if you go to a good church and have a great youth pastor your teens are being taught well. But as the study also found some churches praise youth pastors for being fun and creative a lot more than they praise them for solid teaching. Yes, we want church to be a place where teens have fun safely, but that’s not its only function. So what is a parent to do?
Talk to your teens. Ask them good questions. Could your teen clearly and accurately share their faith? Do they have a solid understanding of forgiveness? How do they view heaven and hell? Do they believe that all of the Bible is true? How does your teen’s faith compare to your own?
Youth Church
Recently, the Youth Church movement has sought to make church more than just movie and game nights. Youth Church features an actual church service- with music and a message catered to a teen and young adult audience. They do still have fun – there are water slides and camping mixed in – but the schedule is focused on solid teaching, accountability in small groups and service to others. You can go to YouthChurch.com to see if there’s a group in your area.
How do you incorporate discussions about faith in your family? We’d love to hear your ideas in the comments.
Tammy – Church hopping isn’t ideal, but not having a church you feel comfortable attending is less ideal. A church family is really important, so how do you go about restoring that? Depends on a few things:
1. Did your kids see something at this particular church that disillusioned them? If so, it would be best to go to an elder or a pastor and talk them your concerns. If something bad happened and you just walk away you leave the issue for the next person who comes along and the Bible is pretty clear about taking our issues to our brothers to work through them together. (There is a caveat to this that I’ve noted below.)
2. If it’s church in general that your kids are struggling with and there isn’t a program or group at your current church that is meeting their needs you may need to look elsewhere. Is there a program at another church in your city that is better suited? You could still worship at your current church and also attend some events at another (that’s allowed :) Or it may be time for your family to consider moving to another church altogether.
There’s no rule that says you can’t move on to another church. If you are a member at your current church, there’s probably a bit of a process to it, but it can be done. If you tell your current church that you are moving on for the sake of your kids I doubt that would cause problems. We all know that young people form a lot of their spiritual identity in the late teens and early 20s. You have to make sure that they can ask their questions in a place where they will get answers and not just walk away from the whole idea of faith.
Lastly, if something really bad happened, you might want to see a counselor. Really complicated situations can be hard to take an elder alone and a counselor could walk through that with you if you wanted.
Church hopping is not an awful thing if you are honestly and actively looking for a new place to belong. It’s when church hopping has no end goal that it becomes a problem. Church functions best when it truly is a community and it’s all but impossible to be part of a community if you’re constantly moving to a new church each week. You know what your kids need and you know that is is your responsibility to care for them the best you can. If that means finding a new church family for this stage in your life, I think that could be a really wise decision.
we are going through changes in our church we still worship but have not been attending church regularly our two young adult children have seen some things throught the church that have left them disillusioned i am not sure how to handle this i do not want to “church hop”