The edges of the screen are fuzzy and peaceful looking. The seats are appropriately spaced. People tilt their seats back with a smile (and with plenty of room on both sides). Children are sitting cross-legged in their seats with their safety belt fastened perfectly around their little waists. The airplane swooshes gently into a sky laden with puffy clouds.
Welcome to your flight.
I am relaxed by the in-flight commercial, until my knee bumps the chair in front of me and jiggles the screen (and a fellow passenger, sorry!). I wish I was as short as the people in the safety video. As the flight gets longer, my already insufficient leg room shrinks. The person in front of me decides to play a cruel joke and tilt his seat back to take away what precious room I have left. And then the child two rows over decides that now would be a good time to test out her singing ability.
But there is a moment, when I get my satisfaction.
The beverage cart comes around, and I order a can. I’ve noticed that when you order a can of anything, they give you the full can. Not just a small cup, but an entire drink all to yourself. Insignificant as it may seem, it is my one moment of bliss.
Welcome to my flight.
As with any flight, there are ways to make your experience a bit better. You just need to come prepared. With your sanity and survival in mind, I offer up the best 10 gadgets to have on a flight.
#10 – The Neck Pillow
Sure, it’s not really a gadget in technical terms. But after watching Lord of the Rings for three hours straight, trust me, you will thank me. Your mini DVD player does not double well as a pillow. A neck pillow will help keep you from sleeping on your neighbor’s shoulder (which means you might actually get to sleep) and guarantees that you won’t spend the next few hours working the kink out of your neck.
#9 – Cell phone
This is a great gadget to have on the plane…so you can put it away! Nothing is more annoying than someone trying to talk on a cell phone above the noise of the plane. So please, set your ringer to quiet, text to your heart’s content, and realize that your conversations are much more enriching when you’re not sharing them with the three rows in front of you.
#8 – Charger
Some airlines come equipped with a standard plug-in for all of your gadgetry. Bring along a charger just in case. Instead of hoping that you have just one more minute of battery life left (and three hours of flying), you’ll be able to keep your devices fresh. (And you’ll be able to finish your Rocky marathon!)
#7 – iPod
Tired of your music? Download an audio book in advance of your flight. If that doesn’t entertain you, try out a few new podcasts. They’re a great way to learn about something new and pass the time. Just make sure you charge the battery before you board. Or better yet, bring item #8.
#6 – DVD Player
What better way to spend the flight than to catch up on a few movies? If you’re riding with a friend, bring an adaptor (or buy a DVD player with several headphone ports). They’re not too expensive and they make the hours fly by. Several airports offer DVD rentals and a few major hubs have kiosks where you can rent a player to take with you.
#5 – Tooth Brush
Again, it’s not technically a gadget (unless its electric). But if you’re stuck on a long flight, there is nothing better than spending a few minutes stretching out and brushing your teeth. Not only will it help you feel refreshed, but it’ll make your drool smell a little bit nicer when you fall asleep without your neck pillow.
#4 – Portable Gaming System
Just like their full-sized cousins, a portable gaming system offers hours of entertainment. But don’t get too carried away when you finally rescue the princess from the angry dragon. (Space is limited.) If you’re intent on doing this for a few hours, you may want to cart along another set of batteries, just in case! (That handy charger works here too.)
#3 – A bottle for water
Chances are the small shot of water they give you from the beverage tray will help…for the next ten minutes. Carry on a small bottle of water to help keep you hydrated. You’ll be so happy that you’ll forget this isn’t technically a gadget.
#2 – Laptop
This is probably the best gadget to have on a plane — provided you’re not spill-prone. If you’ve got a laptop, make sure it is charged (or see #8) and bring your favorite movies or games along (or, if you must, get some work done).
#1 – Headphones
This is the greatest invention known to airlines (and probably the reason they charge you $5 to buy them). Headphones have the potential to make or break your flight experience. Loud child two rows back? You’ve got the solution. A set of compact, noise-canceling headphones will allow you to drift away from the fact that you are crammed into a small seat beside frazzled parents with screaming babies and behind the man who tilted his chair back.
With these gadgets on hand you’re all set to enjoy your flight! Just remember, ask for the full can.
Surviving the transition to university can be smoother if you know some of the differences from high school.
Here are some differences you’ll need to cope with:
No one to check up on your attendance. Skipping class can be highly addictive and hazardous to your GPA, but attending lectures and actively participating helps you learn the material and the prof’s focus.
Bigger classes, less attention. No one will know you’re floundering unless you ask for help. Take advantage of TA labs and office hours or find a tutor. Smile at the person next to you to find a potential study partner, or join a study group.
No spoon fed notes. Notes on the overhead just aren’t as clear as in high school days so learn to take good notes.
Less in-class time, much more homework outside of class. High school classes often include time for homework and review. University assumes you’ll do the work (review, readings, lab reports, papers) on your own. Plan your time to include a bit of studying every day. And stick to your schedule!
More brain power required. Unlike many of your high school classes, university requires active use of your critical thinking skills. Understanding the “why” and being able to discuss the implications or significance of material takes higher priority than memorization and regurgitation.
Longer range assignments. Things can be due even months down the road! Waiting to the last minute can be disastrous. Plan ahead to keep up on readings/labs and start early on larger projects. Give yourself intermediate deadlines.
More electives to choose from. While you’ll still have core courses to take for your chosen major, for the most part (except for maybe Engineering) you’ll have more opportunity for electives. Take courses you didn’t even know existed when you were in high school. Discover what you enjoy. Be well rounded. Take advantage of practical courses.
More opportunities. University gives you more space and experiences to be able to get to know yourself better. There’s more extra curricular opportunities. Get involved on campus, meet new friends. Take advantage of any apprenticeships or internships available.
More freedoms and responsibilities, less time. On top of all the academic stuff, you’re now responsible for housing, food, laundry, cleaning, bills, money and social life. Learning how to prioritize and manage your time well is key to your adjustment and continued success.
More life learning. Develop a positive learning attitude. Though you may have had a “I know everything” attitude in high school, university is an ideal place to remind yourself there’s always room for growth.
People are not perfect, and neither is the world we live in, so it shouldn’t surprise us that our relationships aren’t ideal. Conflict is inevitable in any relationship. Experts tell us that it is a part of every healthy marriage and the same holds true for dating relationships. Avoiding conflict is not the way to romantic bliss. Learning how to handle disagreements with your partner is a big step in the right direction.
Dave Currie, a marriage counselor and marriage conference speaker with 25 years experience as a pastor and college professor sat down with me to discuss some of the important aspects of conflict resolution. He has taught thousands of couples about at marriage conferences across the world. When practiced, these methods will help to resolve differences without allowing feelings of disappointment, bitterness and anger to build up.
Before Conflict Arises
How you behave in your relationship before conflicts hits has a huge impact on how conflict is handled. There are behaviors and attitudes you can put into practice now that will make disagreements a lot easier to handle, and a lot less damaging to your relationship when they do happen.
Have a pre-determined game plan. Agree on conflict resolution guidelines before getting into a tense/difficult discussion. Decide what is acceptable behavior and what you will both do to try and resolve the conflict. One example of a guideline would be agreeing to talk about one issue at a time (see below). This is especially important in the early years of a long term relationship (the first 10 to 15 years), when you are establishing behavior patterns in your relationship.
Maintain a bank account: make deposits as well as withdrawals. The best way to have a great relationship is to catch each other doing things you appreciate. Affirm your partner as you see him/her doing something that pleases you. Set the tone for the relationship by affirming – making “deposits”. If all you’re doing is making “withdrawals” by always complaining and pointing out blunders, it gives your spouse the incentive to give up and say, “I can never please this man/woman”. Train yourself to anticipate and be sensitive to the other person’s feelings.
Practice successive approximations. This is another element of encouragement. It works to reinforce movement in a desired direction. For example, instead of saying “I hate how this place is so dirty!” a better approach would be to say, “I can see that you’re busy. Can I help you pick up?” Remember that there are often better ways to get to the result you’re seeking.
When You Disagree
If you have a pre-determined game plan in place, you’re already a step ahead when a disagreement arises. When you find yourself in conflict, remember that the goal of a disagreement is to find a solution that benefits both parties, neither of you needs to “win”. Don’t set your partner up for an attack, you’re in this together.
Agree on a time to sit and talk with your partner about the issue. As a rough generalization, most men’s thoughts and concerns are compartmentalized. When he’s at work, he becomes preoccupied with what is before him. The same goes for when he’s at home. So if his female partner interrupts him with an issue when he’s busy with something else (for example, watching TV), it could “push his buttons” to create tension. Set a time to meet with him to seriously discuss the issue in a room with no distractions. It is a more effective way to get his full attention.
Deal with one issue at a time. Besides helping to maintain order, it is a more effective way to achieve the goal of working through the problems at hand to arrive at a resolution. So identify your concerns, making sure to deal with issue #1 before moving on to issue #2.
Use “I” statements instead of “you” statements. This helps to keep both sides from getting on the defensive. Realize that words are important. They can be delivered in such a way as to either bring healing or destruction. When the word “you” is used frequently when speaking to your partner, he/she will automatically feel accused. This in turn can provoke unnecessary reactions that will only serve to keep you both from resolving the issues in the most simple and straightforward manner.
Think through problems to avoid misunderstandings. “I didn’t mean that”. “I thought that’s what you said”. How often have you heard these words, or spoken them to your spouse? It is so easy to make assumptions. Be careful to actively listen to the other person and strive to clarify misunderstandings.
Share your perspective without getting emotional. Women, let’s be honest. More often than not, when we get frustrated, we clam up. But as difficult as it may be, share your perspective while holding your ground. Don’t get too emotional too early. Men often interpret that as manipulation.
Getting Rid of the Root of Bitterness
How is your relationship? Do you find it easy or difficult to communicate with your partner? If you have feelings of resentment and anger that have been accumulating over time, it’s vital that you take action to rid yourself of those toxic feelings.
What is "A Course in Miracles", and why is Oprah Winfrey offering these daily courses via her satellite radio program and promoting the courses on her show? Is it a new age philosophy, a religion, or something entirely different?
Whatever it is, it would be a mistake to ignore what Oprah promotes. Her TV show, magazine, website, and other media ventures that are part of her massive Harpo Productions corporation have huge readership, so anything she promotes (especially as frequently as she has promoted A Course in Miracles) will result in huge sales.
An article on TheLife.com explores what A Course in Miracles is all about: Oprah and A Course in Miracles. We encourage you to read it, and invite you to post your responses in the comments on this blog.
Embarrassment. Shame. Disgust. These ugly words don’t begin to describe the horror of what it felt like to be beat up as a 14 year old. I can still remember my classmates gathered around cheering for the ones delivering the powerful blows. As the beatings continued, I looked for a place deep within myself where I could pretend that the beatings weren’t happening to me.
I didn’t know what I had done to be hated so much. As an adult, I still don’t know. I didn’t understand why tormenting me was such a fun event for everyone else. The beating seemed to last forever and finally I was left laying on the ground. Beaten and bruised, I stood up to make my way back to the school building. I knew this day would forever change my life.
My peers accomplished something that day. They stripped me of my self-worth and made me hate myself as much as they hated me. I believed I deserved it. I was too scared to tell my family or any of the teachers. It happened a lot that year.
In the years that followed, I went through a lot of pain because I disliked myself so much. So much hurt could have been avoided if I would have dared speak out. I was convinced that no one would hear me if I did. Now, as an adult, I can see that my thinking was wrong. I did not deserve to be beaten-up. I had done nothing wrong and if I had gone to someone in authority they would have helped me. I was not as along as I felt.
School beatings have been in the news a lot the past few days. How can students and adults stand aside and watch as children are tortured? What can we do to stop this abuse? What if the student was one of your own friends? What if it was you?
Before the Internet, most famous people became well known because of exceptional ability, talent, or achievement that was particularly noteworthy. Nowadays, any idiot with a webcam can become famous (and many do). How many of the popular Internet memes in the video do you recognize?
Question to ponder: Are people making significant achievements in the fields of humanities and sciences being subjugated by the popularity of "Internet people", whose obscure talents may make us laugh (often at the person instead of with them) yet add little to our practical lives or life fulfillment?
Earlier this month, the world celebrated Martin Luther King Jr Day on the 40th anniversary of Dr King’s historic speech where he dreamed of equality for people of all races. The issue of race has come back prominently into the news in Canada with the announcement that the Toronto District School Board approved moving ahead to created an "Afro-centric school":
The debate over Africentric schools in Toronto is raging [due to] a controversial step to help struggling black students with alternative education. By a vote of 11 to nine, school trustees agreed on an "operational model" for a black-focused school. The school would focus on the experiences and contributions of African people with a goal of discouraging students in the black community from dropping out.
A study done in 2006 found that 40 per cent of black students do not complete high school. [Source: CTV News]
Do you think a race-focused school will help? Is it appropriate to create schools which are tailored to specific races, or should public schools attempt to present a unified and diverse curriculum that is applicable to everyone in modern multicultural North America?
Discover Jesus
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Today is a new day, a fresh start! From today on, things will be different.
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Embarrassment. Shame. Disgust. These ugly words don’t begin to describe the horror of what it felt like to be beat up as a 14 year old. I can still remember my classmates gathered around cheering for the ones delivering the powerful blows. As the beatings continued, I looked for a place deep within myself where I could pretend that the beatings weren’t happening to me.
I didn’t know what I had done to be hated so much. As an adult, I still don’t know. I didn’t understand why tormenting me was such a fun event for everyone else. The beating seemed to last forever and finally I was left laying on the ground. Beaten and bruised, I stood up to make my way back to the school building. I knew this day would forever change my life.
My peers accomplished something that day. They stripped me of my self-worth and made me hate myself as much as they hated me. I believed I deserved it. I was too scared to tell my family or any of the teachers. It happened a lot that year.
In the years that followed, I went through a lot of pain because I disliked myself so much. So much hurt could have been avoided if I would have dared speak out. I was convinced that no one would hear me if I did. Now, as an adult, I can see that my thinking was wrong. I did not deserve to be beaten-up. I had done nothing wrong and if I had gone to someone in authority they would have helped me. I was not as along as I felt.
School beatings have been in the news a lot the past few days. How can students and adults stand aside and watch as children are tortured? What can we do to stop this abuse? What if the student was one of your own friends? What if it was you?
People are not perfect, and neither is the world we live in, so it shouldn’t surprise us that our relationships aren’t ideal. Conflict is inevitable in any relationship. Experts tell us that it is a part of every healthy marriage and the same holds true for dating relationships. Avoiding conflict is not the way to romantic bliss. Learning how to handle disagreements with your partner is a big step in the right direction.
