Father God, I pray that you will breathe a fresh knowing and revelation into Azzi’s heart, mind and situation. May You bring hope, joy and peace into Azzi’s circumstances so that all anxiety and confusion shall cease. May Azzi know that all things are possible with You. When there seems to be no way…You make a way. In Jesus Name, Amen

The article hits on many important points for those who are dating as well as married couples. For me,

“He gives us real choice within the wider boundaries of his will”

is right on point. It sometimes gets tricky to consider where the line is between what is meant to be (God’s will) and our own choices. Bill Strom did a good job in illustrating how it looks like to be guided by His will to make the ultimate decision, with an emphasis on the role of our choices.

Now a couple of questions for the community —

Is it healthy to choose to marry a partner you do not have chemistry for, you do not have those in love feelings for? In a way “choosing to love the one you (will) marry” (because you’re already comfortable with them, they are helpful, they are Godly, and/or they stuck around the longest as a friend) vs. “marrying the one you love”?

What about choosing a future spouse as if you have already passed the honeymoon phase without even having the honeymoon phase? (not because of an arranged marriage situation but more because you anticipate that romantic relationships lose the honeymoon phase anyway)

As a Christian, you can end up with several Godly potentials that can spur you in your relationship with God. If that applies to several possibilies, then is not having chemistry a litmus test of God’s will and unconditional love? (Again, this is for the dating stage — not after you have made a commitment to another person before God)

I have had interesting discussions about this :)

“One who lets the other person just be who they are, letting go and truly believing God to dealing with them while working on our ownselves. Remembering we’re not fighting against flesh and blood, but a real spirit world of darkness that wnats to destroy the very foundations of a good marriage…we can choose to operate in fleshly weapons…or spiritual ones….love expects nothing in return..it just loves”

So true Sherry! Sometimes we get caught up in the emotions of relationships and how the other person affects us that we sometimes forget it is a spiritual battle, that there is more to what we see and that the path of emotions. When it breaks one another down is not from God. When we can leave a relationship so easily without regard to how it creates wounds – both in ourselvs and in others – it is not from God. God wouldn’t send Jesus to demonstrate love unconditional and selfless only to have us do otherwise in intimate relationships.

Even in dating, I believe we need to choose to love one another in a way that does not make it a challenge for the other to guard his/her heart so as not to rob them of sacred emotions and gifts meant for their future spouse. Being able to do that while dating helps us practice self-less love, love that sacrifices ones own needs/ impulses, for the benefit of the other. Love that respects boundaries. If dating truly looked like that, it might not be so bad to date different people before marriage. But how often does dating look like that? It’s not a surprise that the dating field is also a battle field because of how marriage is spiritually attacked.