Do You See?
“See what you have to look forward to now?”
The whisper in my ear made my smile widen. It was Dec. 10th and we were on our first outing with our new baby. She was only 10 days old, but we braved the frigid Yukon winter to attend the Christmas pageant at a small mission church.
I knew the service wouldn’t be a grand production. The “church” was just a hall, tiny and dilapidated. The carols were sung a cappella, without a pianist to help keep us in tune. The “pageant” consisted of six or seven children dressed in bathrobes, their heads swathed in kitchen towels, and the backdrop was made of cardboard stars covered in tinfoil.
But I was seeing everything attached to Christmas in a new way. The tinfoil stars glittered more brightly than a chandelier. The carols were as harmonious as though sung by angels. And the children… ah, the children made the story live!
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I was bursting with thankfulness.
I had just been given the desire of my heart, the precious gift of a child of my own. We had been told it wouldn’t happen and after 5 years without conceiving a child, my husband and I tried to resign ourselves to that reality. I took great pains to hide the deep sadness I found almost unbearable. No one knew how much I wanted a baby, but the clues were there. I was angry much of the time. Convinced God was punishing me, I hated Him. The bitterness poured into all aspects of my life.Until the day God laughed.
It was on the road to Mayo, Yukon. I was going to visit a friend, determined not to think about God or religion or any of the baffling questions my husband kept bringing up. But no matter what I tried, my mind would not rest. The question of God’s existence and what He had to do with me, would not go away. In desperation, I pulled my vehicle into a look-out point above the Stewart River.
I challenged God to prove Himself
The beautiful river valley stretched out below, but I barely saw it. In a turmoil, I challenged God to do something to prove He was there. Then I realized how foolish I was, talking to a God I did not really believe existed. At that point something happened which I have never been able to describe adequately. I “heard” laughter, like a grandfather chuckling, and the words, “Yes, but I love you anyway.” None of this was audible, yet it was shockingly real. I thought I was going insane. The turmoil had finally pushed me over the edge and now I was hearing voices!
I stomped on the gas pedal of my truck, turned the radio up as loud as it would go, and fled. My visit with my friend turned out to be more discussion of spiritual things, but by the time I returned home I was determined not to pursue Christianity. Besides, I had something else on my mind. I had been suffering from a strange flu – the kind that happens every morning. My friend said, “sounds like morning sickness to me.” But that wasn’t possible. The tests had told us so.
Soon after, I woke with the realization that I had to get to the washroom. It was about the 7th day of the “flu.” As I repeated the morning’s routine of the past few days, the realization that I was in fact pregnant flooded over me like a warm rain. With it came a searing thunderbolt of truth. This was the “something” I had challenged God to do. The child growing in my womb was His answer, the proof of His love. He gave me the desire of my heart. She was born Nov. 30, 1982
I believed the Christmas story
“See what you have to look forward to now?” Oh yes, I saw. I saw a future filled with the knowledge there is peace without measure, grace without limit and love without conditions. I saw a future suddenly bright because I believed the Christmas story. A tiny baby, whose sole purpose was to die for me and my child, was born in Bethlehem. I saw the reality that the Christ is still intimately involved in our lives here on earth.
Though the church was just a hall, the music less than perfect, and the costumes home-made, the story was exquisite. The story is true!
Take a look at your life. How would you describe it? Contented? Rushed? Exciting? Stressful? Moving forward? Holding back? For many of us it’s all of the above at times. There are things we dream of doing one day, there are things we wish we could forget. In the Bible, it says that Jesus came to make all things new. What would your life look like if you could start over with a clean slate?
Living with hope
If you are looking for peace, there is a way to balance your life. No one can be perfect, or have a perfect life. But every one of us has the opportunity to experience perfect grace through a personal relationship with God through His Son, Jesus Christ.
You can receive Christ right now by faith through prayer. Praying is simply talking to God. God knows your heart and is not so concerned with your words as He is with the attitude of your heart. Here’s a suggested prayer:
Lord Jesus, I want to know you personally. Thank you for dying on the cross for my sins. I open the door of my life to you and ask you to come in as my Savior and Lord. Take control of my life. Thank you for forgiving my sins and giving me eternal life. Make me the kind of person you want me to be.
Does this prayer express the desire of your heart? You can pray it right now, and Jesus Christ will come into your life, just as He promised.
Is this the life for you?
If you invited Christ into your life, thank God often that He is in your life, that He will never leave you and that you have eternal life. As you learn more about your relationship with God, and how much He loves you, you’ll experience life to the fullest.
