What Does Your Soul Crave?
I read a book called Soul Cravings by Erwin McManus. These are my thoughts (McManus’ quotes are in italics).
It’s hard to define the things inside my heart. I wonder if I’m the only one who feels what I feel and wants what I want. Am I the same as others in this mass of humanity, or am I alone in my experiences?
Maybe you sometimes feel the same way.
In high school, I had a vague notion that when I graduated I would take off for a couple days, go somewhere in the wild, set up a tent, and spend three days with myself. My hope was that at the end of the time, with nothing but myself and some food, I would have a better idea of who I am and what I want, and where to head with my life.
It’s six years later, and I would still like a getaway like that. Even to myself, I’m a mystery.
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Some themes in life are reoccurring. In many different ways, different places and different voices, human desires are articulated.
- Intimacy
- Destiny
- Meaning
It seems that these are integral parts of the human make-up, but why? What makes us long for these things?
Given all the problems love can create, why do we keep longing for it? How many thousands of years will it take for us to learn? How many Romeos and Juliets need to lie dead on the floor before we’re willing to give up this perverse addiction? Oh, I know they weren’t real, but then again, is love? If evolution is our preferred understanding of the human story, why can’t we evolve ourselves out of this primal Achilles’ heel we know as love? And don’t give me this thing about the propagation of the species. Love isn’t necessary for reproduction – just sex is. All you need is attraction, not emotion…If intimacy is only about attraction, we could just keep lust and dispense with love. But it just won’t go away. – Erwin McManus
When I first read this, I stopped and went through it again. And then a third time. Yeah. Why do we crave love? Why do I want to be known so deeply, to know someone and trust them and be trustworthy?
It is not enough for me to be kind of cool, or for me to have had a moment or two of meaningful connection. I want it to go on. I stress over relational disharmony, I crave connection – not just a physical connection, but a deep emotional bond of being known and being wanted.
All of us long to become something more than we are. We are driven to achieve, moved to accomplish, fueled by ambition. It burns hotter in some than in others, but it is within all of us. We’re all searching for our unique purpose, our divine destiny, or simply a sense of significance or some measure of success…all of us are united in our desperate attempt to make a future for ourselves. We all desperately want to achieve something, to accomplish something; we just don’t know what. Worse than that, we don’t even understand why. Yet that doesn’t stop us from searching. – Erwin McManus
It’s true, I think to myself. I do want to achieve. I don’t know what exactly, but something. I don’t want to sit here in anonymity for the rest of my life. But why? I could get by, I’m sure. Why wouldn’t that be enough?
Have you ever thought about this? What drives us to do, to accomplish? Why do we want to make the world a better place – for myself at least, if not for others? Where does our creative urge come from, and why are we not content to be spoon-fed for the rest of our lives?
This may be a jump for some, but Erwin and I both think it has to do with God. Not God who sits in a palace and points his lightning-trident at anyone he catches doing wrong, but God who loves us and created us with purpose and creativity. God who created us with the hope that we would do good and not harm.
Continue reading: Part 2: What’s God got to do with it?
Dear Heavenly Father,
I pray now for Paul. I thank You for Your mercy and grace in our lives. Sometimes I think we overlook a great miracle – the miracle of getting up, getting out and pressing on to live life everyday. There are so many reasons to give up, to want to escape or withdraw; everywhere we look, we can find evidence of brokenness, sin, disorder, disharmony and despair. Thank You for Your grace, which is sufficient. Thank You for Your Son, our Lord Jesus, who wraps us up in Himself, so that we are whole and holy, righteous and strong for the Kingdom. Father, bless us as we live to witness to Your goodness, Your provision, Your compassion and Your love. Increase our faith, help us to look to Jesus, not to the storm around us, which can so easily bring us down.
Father, I also pray for all the little children who are suffering abuse today. Father, I know Your heart breaks for them, I know Your arm is not too short to save, I know that You are the God of history, personal and involved, so we ask for relief. Be the refuge for these children, You are our Rock and Fortress, our help in time of need; help them to know it.
Thank You Father for answering these prayers prayed in the name of Jesus. Amen
Paul M. McLaughlin – 2013
My URL; http://www.efn.org/~scan
My Email; [it is our policy not to post personal contact information. For your safety we will remove your comments completely if you persist in sharing your email address, mailing address and phone number.]
Organization; Stop Child Abuse-Save Our Children
Webpage URL; http://www.efn.org/~scan/abused00.htm
Phone; [removed]
Stop Child Abuse NOW! since 1975 from Donora, (Pittsburgh), Pennsylvania to Portland, Oregon by a Survivor and his Handicapped, Paul M. McLaughlin.
DONORA, PENNSYLVANIA to PORTLAND, OREGON – 1975
True Story from Donora, Pennsylvania and Portland, Oregon. One man over a childhood during which he and his twin sister were tormented and severly abused for eighteen years while the older brother and sister was not abused and not seek help. As a precious little boy he came close to death twice but Paul McLaughlin survived, and has been a tireless crusader for the rights of children and against child abuse. http://www.efn.org/~scan/abused00.htm
WARNING
Paul and Paula abused for over 18 years of their childhood. Large SCARS on Paul’s face, scalp, mind and memory. Paul and Paula placed on top of hot stove burner by the mother. Forced fed bars of hand soap and powder soap.. Enema treatment that you do not want to know about. Stand in cornner of a room for long hours. Hit and beaten with a stick without any clothes on. Tied up in the attic and beaten and passed out because of pain. Hands bent backward. Teeth knocked out. Forced to eat food till we vomit and have to eat our vomit. So much abuse that can’t be written. Paul almost dead two times since a baby infant and again at the age of 5. Medical report on web pages.
PARENTS
The father was never abused when he was a child. The mother grew up and was also not abuse when she was growing up
into an adult. However, the mother have a mental mind of a 12 year old child and is consider to be a handicapped. The mother
abused the twins in the family and not abused the older son and daughter. Paul and Paula was severly abused and they did not
repeat the same behavior onto any other children, kids, family.
EDUCATION
Paul M. McLaughlin graduated from Donora RINGGOLD High school in 1970 at the age of 21 – Special Education and got drafted into the army. Paul’s twin sister Paula graduated in 1967 at the age of 18 and moved to McKeesport, Pennsylvania.
MILITARY and BIRTH
Paul cheated on written examination to get into the army and away from his abuser. Paul and Paula, born on October 13, 1948 in Donora, Pennsylvania. “700 Castner Ave” – Donora is about a 45 minutes drive from SE of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.
EXAMPLES OF WORKS FOR ABUSED CHILDREN
Paul began his life’s work in Portland and Eugene, Oregon. He speak out on talk radio, open forums, symposium, a television commercial. Advertising on awareness of child abuse, newspaper and magazine articles. Volunteer his time with other nonprofit organization on fund raising for the homeless, hungry, crippled children, cancer, United Way, Child Abuse, etc. 1975 to 1999
COMPUTER and HIS WIFE
Today, (2009) Paul M. McLaughlin and his wife Liz SEVEN McLaughlin now live in Eugene, Oregon where they continue to fight for the right of children everywhere from fear and abuse. Paul on computer since 1994 to educate people on the topic of child abuse.
[removed]
PAUL’S TWIN SISTER PASSED AWAY.
As of August 27, 2007 Paul’s twin sister Paula, passed away from having kidney stones since the age of 21 in McKeesport, Pennsylvania. See photos of web pages for Paul and Paula’s of childhood and Paul’s works of helping abused children since 1975
YEAR 2047;
The Paul M. McLaughlin story will be told again in the year 2047. Paul’s story, audio tape, newspapers, will be told again in
Eugene, Oregon. SEE WEB PAGE PHOTOS OF THIS TIME CAPSULE
Paul taken ill with epilepsy for over 25 years. In 1999, Paul taken ill with Multiple Scerlosis. Had to learn to walk, speaking, vision in bad way and other ugly illnes that goes with MS. Kidney Stones since January of 2013 – Surgery.
You will not see this in your community.
Paul M. McLaughlin True Life Story From Donora, Pennsylvania
in Register Guard Newspaper in Eugene, Oregon
http://www.efn.org/~scan/abused00.htm
Web Page About Paul McLaughlin of his works — Christian True Short Story at:
http://www.efn.org/~scan/story5t.html
Paul’s Street Campaighn since 1975 to 1999 across the U.S.
http://www.efn.org/~scan/crusade-pics.html
scan@efn.org
Paul M. McLaughlin
Liz SEVEN McLaughlin
Stop Child Abuse Now!
[removed]
Work to Prevent Child Abuse – 1975 to 2000
by Paul M. McLaughlin.
Donora, Pennsylvania to Portland and Eugene, Oregon.
———–
April is Child Abuse Awareness month, and there’s no better
time for you to get involved, stay informed and spread the word
to others.
When children are nurtured, they can grow up to be happy and
healthy adults.
But when they lack an attachment to a caring adult, receive
inconsistent nurturing or experience harsh discipline, the long-
lasting consequences can affect their health, well-being and
relationships with others.
I was one of those children. I know the terror and desperation of
living in fear from over 18 years of my childhood from severe
childhood abuse that almost taken my life away two times as a
baby infant to the age of five. I know the pain of being forgotten
and alone. I will never forget.
Since 1975, I have been working to build awareness, provide
education and inspire hope to everyone involved in the effort to
prevent the abuse and neglect of our nation’s children.
Help us promote healthy families today!
http://www.efn.org/~scan
http://www.efn.org/~scan/abused00.htm
[it is our policy not to publish personal contact information]
“I Was Loved in the Midst of Suffering”. True testimony about Paul McLaughlin and his love for all children who has suffer from some form of childhood abuse. Paul knows at hands of what abuse is. SCARS on face, large deep scars on scalp. Broken nose and mental abuse by the mother. http://www.efn.org/~scan/story5t.html
I beg for all children to read my life story and read the kind of abuse that I went through as an infant to an 20 year old man. I almost lost my life and I got revenge of the suffering that I went through. I was told many times to forgive the mother who had abused me and who tried to kill me. I was told that when I die, I will see my mother again and she will be younger again and beautiful. I have to learn to forgive those who has done wrong in my life and I also must learn to not hurt anyone in a physical or mental way. I NEVER ABUSED ANYONE, BUT HAVE PRAYED AND PRAYED FOR PEACE FOR ME AND TO MANY OTHER PEOPLE WHO ARE SUFFERING FROM SOME KIND OF ABUSE. I done something in my life to help children and I wish that many more people would do what I have done. To learn more about my works and my story, please see and read my story and just maybe more miracles will happen. Send me a email and I be happy to send you that information at. THANK YOU FOR THE BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE WHO SENDS THEIR LOVING CARING HEARTS BY EMAIL LETTER. IT HAS BROUGHT A WARM KIND FEELING IN MY MIND AND HEART. I ALSO GIVE THANKS FOR THE WELL EDUCATION PEOPLE. [it is our policy not to publish personal contact information] DO NOT BE AFRAID TO ASK QUESTIONS TO THIS SLOW LEARNER. http://www.efn.org/~scan Paul Marvin McLaughlin
Hi Paul, I could never presume to know the answer to your question. It is a question that many other people have asked as well and while I know that God has brought peace to the hearts of some I am not sure that anyone has received the complete answer from God about “Why”. I know my grandpa asked that question as well. He was orphaned by the age of 7 and was caught in the middle of the Russian Revolution. He saw enough death, torture, rape and evil in his early years that he would have every reason to become an angry and bitter man. When he came as a refugee to Canada he was placed with a family that treated him like a slave, making him sleep alone in the barn. There were many occasions when the father of that family beat him to the point of unconsciousness.
But there were a few things that helped him through all that and planted a hope deep within his heart. The first happened when he sat beside his mother’s bed as she lay dying from small pox. As she was breathing her last she described to him the angels that she saw and the beauty of the light that was shining down on her. That gave grandpa a confidence that there was something more than just this life here. The other thing that my grandpa points to as something that gave him strength through difficult days was a young girl in Canada who heard him cry as he tried to recite a poem on Mother’s Day. Her heart was moved to compassion for this young 11 year old boy and she committed to pray for him. And she never stopped praying for him until she died some 73 years later.
The two of them together discovered the power of a loving God who is able to take terrible things in our lives and transform them into something beautiful. My grandpa married that young praying girl and together God led them into a life of pastoring churches across Western Canada. Through all those terrible experiences that my grandpa faced, God prepared him to have a tender gentle heart who understood people’s hurts. He had a tremendous ability to comfort people who were dying or mourning the loss of a laved one. That became a huge part of his work as a pastor and he was able to come alongside hurting people and share with them the comfort that he had received from God.
Paul, I don’t know why God has allowed you to suffer like you have but it could very well be that part of it is so that you can help comfort others who are hurting. Your work in raising awareness of child abuse is certainly making a difference in this world. I don’t want to say that is why you were abused but God is helping you to use your suffering to help ease the suffering of others. Let me encourage you to continue to care for the suffering of others and allow God to use you to bring be an agent of comfort in a world of hurting people. And let me encourage others to follow the link to Paul’s website by clicking on his name in his comment and see the kind of work he has been doing to help stop child abuse.
Heavenly Father, I pray for Paul. You know the questions that he has in his heart and You know the plans that You have for his life. I pray Lord that You would comfort him. Bring him new hope of Your plans and purposes for him. Empower him to become an agent of Your comfort in the lives of other people and give him the joy of seeing people set free from the weight of bitterness and anger. Thank You for Your constant perfect love for us all. Amen.
So I grew up being severe abuse by my mother. Twice almost lost my life and abused for over 20 years plus serving 2 years in the army. My older brother and sister were NOT abused. I graduated from Donora, Pennsylvania high school in 1970 at the age of 21. My question is: Why did God allow children to be abused and why so many children lost their life from this abuse.? I do NOT believe in Satin. Satin has nothing to do with my life on earth. God has something to do with my life on earth.
[it is our policy not to publish personal contact information]
[...] What Does Your Soul Crave? [...]
It is human nature to want to be more than you are and to have meaningful connections and relationships. I do believe that we are love and God put us here to do good not hurt others. The first step to getting this is to love yourself, I think.
“I came so that they may Life and Life to the Full.”
“Life and death is in the power of the tongue: so choose Life.”
If I live in reaction to the powers of darkness, then the devil has a role in my agenda. And he is not worthy… I can’t afford to let what the devil has done-through me or to me-affect me. I don’t want his fingerprints on my thinking. He is not worthy of setting my agenda. – Bill Johnson
“It is perilous to study too deeply the arts of the Enemy, for good or for ill.” – Elrond, from Lord of the Rings
There’s the story of a famous psychiatrist who was asked what advice to give to a person suffering from loneliness, anxiety, or depression. The journalist asking him this thought he would say something professional – go visit a counselor. But his answer was unexpected. He said, “My advice is to put on your coat, and lock your house. Then go across the railroad and help someone who doesn’t have something – that you DO have.” We all need the Presence of someone who cares. Taking the risk to be present to care precedes the ideas and actions of caring. And usually, the Presence makes the biggest difference of it all. We all need the Presence of Jesus – if Jesus is love.
And to be clear – He already hurt for us 2000 years ago on cross. This was so true that He said, “It is finished.” So instead of our pain, we experience His Life. Instead of poverty and abuse, we experience His Riches and Honor. Have you ever thanks Him for the cross? Did you know that He healed everyone who came to him for three years – this included thousands of people. No one ever healed as well as He did – or loved as deeply as He loved. There are stories of His healings throughout the centuries. And today millions experience healing and abundance because of Jesus. Don’t get bitter and wonder – what about me – instead thank Him for what He’s done for your world. That’s what He’s in the middle of doing for you too.
You can love yourself, but one day someone loves you because of Jesus- not for selfish reasons -not even any strings attached – but they lay down their life for you anyway and that’s when you know you’ve met the face of…Someone.
I do love myself, but I only learn how to do this from That Person. Otherwise I just sink into self-indulgence – which gets really weird. It’s really not about intellectualizing. And it’s not about lonely self-hatred. It’s about something else…
Most of us think of God as judgmental. It’s so weird. Why? Does that make it true? Is he judgmental? Jesus promises that He is not judgmental and He also promises He’s God. So while being honest with us about His Truth, that truth seems like a lie to us. Why? Anyone willing to fight an unseen Enemy of hatred to get to the truth of Love? Anyone willing look past imperfect human jars of clay to see the perfect Savior within? Why do we have landscapes and cityscapes? Pride puffs up, but love builds up.
No greater love is there than this – that a person lay down their life for friends. I’m sorry but I’m just pathetically arrogant if I try this on my own – but if Someone really isn’t judgmental then maybe they can show me how to do this without arrogance. Is there any way that Someone could make this Easy? Jesus said – my burden is easy, my burden is light.
No one has ever seen God – yet God is revealed in the face of the Selfless Adventurer – the one ready to die to show his friends Their Love.
All of us are too sin-sick to lay down our lives for anyone – yet Jesus showed his love for us this way – while we were still sinners He died for us to give us Life. Do you sin? Has anyone called you Perfect anyway? Jesus does. God does. Do you think you’re sinless? Perfect Blood cleanses sin. …. nobody but Jesus knows your imperfections so well. Yet no one else will call you Perfect more adamantly – and more truthfully. It’s His Perfect Suffering on a cross in our place that allows us the confidence to stop hurting ourselves – to let Him hurt for us instead.
I am really touched by what Simona said. Wow! Love is a “who” and not a “what”. I love because the very substance of my being is love. I have been born again out of love. I don’t think to love, i cannot but love. Glory to God!!!
YOU ARE LOVE! The raw material making you is Love. Love is not a feeling, a mood or a habit that you have to develop or cultivate over time. Love is your very nature.* Love is Not an Emotion, It is Your Very Existence!
hey, we all crave love, but in craving it we give away our power. Because we are love, and if we love ourself, then we do not need to find that love in someone else. yes, we still want company. but we find that company in knowing that i do not need the love of that other and sure as heck we do not want them to suck the love out of us.
be simple, love yourself.
Hey- FYI– I just got the short film/ teaching series that’s available on DVD on this; it’s called “CRAVE” … really amazing resource. You can get it at bookstores but its on Erwin’s site as well.
“This may be a jump for some, but Erwin and I both think it has to do with God. Not God who sits in a palace and points his lightning-trident at anyone he catches doing wrong, but God who loves us and created us with purpose and creativity. God who created us with the hope that we would do good and not harm”
Im as lost with your questions but probably more than you are and Im 44 years old. But I can say God exists no question and He mad Man (Woman) in His image. And look at the creativity in the world. Look closely at a Cheetah or an exotic fish. This is God’s creativity. It’s amazing. Your creativity comes from God.
Kitty, thanks for your comments. When you say you are a “proud atheist”, what about this particular stance causes you pride? Most would define atheism as being non-religious. So what about religion do you especially dislike? What have your experiences with “organized religion” been like?
Did you happen to check out the follow-up article, “Part 2: What’s God got to do with it?” It continues the thought at the end of this article, and without it, the ending here may indeed seem a bit abrupt.
You lost me on that last “God” sentence (I’m a proud atheist), but other than that I agree.
Im so sorry! maybe i didn’t make myself clear. When i said that i agreed with Cat, i was not talking about having children, I was agreeing that the message of our basic, God-given longings is a simple one to understand. I dont consider simplicity to be a bad thing. I would never suggest that people have children just to leave something lasting on the planet.
and btw…the nick ReGenR8 was referring to a spiritual condition, as in re-born. I shall re-think using this nick in the future …:-P
Just another comment. Our ability to reproduce is certainly one way leave something lasting but I would hope you would agree that it’s not the only one. Our ability to touch peoples lives in a meanful way, that helps them to become a better person, I think would also qualify as something lasting. If we can encourage people, help them through thier struggles, show compassion in words and deeds. Contribute to making this world a better place, which could take on many forms, these things can leave many significant impressions on our life here. And ultimately showing people what you said ReGenR8 can be our greatest contribution.
I’m gonna have to agree with Cat….His questions are very basic ..(that’s the beauty of it)..and the reason he answers them all with Gd is, Gd is the answer to them all..So perfectly simple we miss it.
So Cat, they have been answered better? I would surley like to hear them. What are they?
I think our desire to create something lasting is a sort of analogue of our need to reproduce. Not everyone can have kids–not everyone LIKES kids–but we still have this drive to create something that will last when we’re gone. It’s not entirely rational, but hey, it’s worked. As for love, apes are social animals. We survive better when we’re part of a group, so people who love each other have an advantage.
As I’ve said before, I wasn’t impressed with McManus. The questions he asks are so basic, and he answers them all with God, when they’ve been answered better, more in-depth, and more satisfactorily for hundreds of years now.