Comments on: Heart Problems: A Dad Shaped Hole

By: Bernard

Thu, 22 Sep 2011 01:05:33 +0000

It is amazing how much a father influences a child’s self esteem by either being positive or negative. Fathers need to watch out that they don’t exasperate their children. It is a struggle for me too because I basically grew up with criticism from both parents and my father had his own business so I did not spend much time with him but he still tried to spend time with his children for which I am thankful.
I am thankful for the good time I had with my dad. I realize that because of the kind of life he had he was unable to show emotions in a healthy way. He is not even able to talk about the pain he endured except it comes through small stories he tells me.

By: Tine

Tine — Tue, 20 Sep 2011 03:36:54 +0000

to all you daughters with a hole in your heart with the shape of your dad. You are not along! I pray for a healing of your broken heart. Mine is broken too! But I hope I can let go up the past and appreciate the present. I hope I can love my dad. I am holding on to my Father’s promise that He will never leave me nor forsake me!. I call Him Abba (God) is my Father! And I hope that will help me love my dad!

By: Sharon

Tue, 07 Jun 2011 14:47:56 +0000

this is an emotional issue with me, my dad was home in the evenings growing up and worked during the day but he wasn’t home emotionally, i did have a dad but then again i didn’t and now he is in a home with alzeheimers the last stages of it and doesn’t know us or talk and is in a wheel chair. i am sd when i see daughters out with fathers and i didn’t have that chance at all.

By: German Malave

German Malave — Sun, 05 Jun 2011 19:37:55 +0000

I’m impressed, I must say. Really seldom do I discover a blog that’s both educative and entertaining, and let me tell you, you have hit the nail on the head. Your article is important; the matter is something that not many people are speaking intelligently about. I’m very happy that I stumbled across this in my search for something relating to it.

By: Francine

Francine — Wed, 03 Nov 2010 21:51:13 +0000

Still receiving updates on this subject tells me Dads have a huge impact on every Childs life.
Whether it be positive or negative I’ve learned with the guidance and molding and shaping me by my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, that I must take the positive and cling to it and the negative as something to learn what not to do or to avoid throughout my life to avoid the same negative outcome in my life and my own family. So we can see our past negative experiences as blessings in disguise because we are better individuals because of our parents mistakes and cling to our Lord Jesus Christ for the remainder of our lives. Be blessed and be a blessing.

By: Lee

Lee — Wed, 03 Nov 2010 21:18:58 +0000

My ex left the marriage and his 3 children,11,8,and 4..They have all suffered from this..My daughter went into drugs and was always looking for love,never understanding why her daddy left her.My oldest son went on to feel never good enough or small to have his dad’s love..The youngest was sheltered and loved by his siblings..Men who walk out on their kids do a lifetime of damage and change the future of there kids…Today over 20 yrs later..my kids love their dad..but see him in a whole different light….They tell me ..you don’t want him back mom…My daughter still yearns to be daddy’s little girl and would do anything for him..my boys..no..their over it and see him for what he was and is..He went on to father 3 more children that are in the same spot as mine..Not knowing if their dad really loves them or not…Very sad

By: D

Sun, 31 Oct 2010 14:59:53 +0000

I am reading each story and comment of their own father. I believe that my father is the reason or cause of my problems today, HOWEVER, there is nothing really ‘wrong’ about him. Let me explain… he is not an alcoholic, he is not abusive, and he has never walked out on us.
But.. he was also never reallly home. He worked everyday, 12 hours a day, for us: food, shelter, cars, etc. I do not really know my father. And He really has high expectations for us; something I cannot ever reach. Because of him I was afraid to fail (I never was taught it was okay to make mistakes, or perfectionism0)

By: charlene

charlene — Sun, 18 Jul 2010 13:54:06 +0000

I am the sixth child out of twelve, my father loved me and my siblings. He was an alcoholic which also six of my siblings are. My father died at age 48 of a heart attack. I could always talk to my father whether he was drunk or sober. He always made me feel like I was important. I loved being near him whether he drank or not. He always gave me a way to figure out my problems on my own by making me think things through. I miss him to this day so very much. His dying left me with an emptiness that has never been filled by anyone. I love my dad very much.

By: Francine

Francine — Sat, 19 Jun 2010 22:01:21 +0000

I just came from visiting my dad who is incarcerated. He is 73 yrs old , he was a abusive alcoholic and when I was a child He was my monster he scared me to death… Seeing him limp (effects of an anurism) to the visiting table see his balding pure white hair and mustache he doesnt seem so scary anymore. He wore my mom out and she is with Jesus now. My brother was murdered execution style and was a pedefile. My three older sisters and I are so messed up from our upbringing that we dont have relationships with eachother, incapable of loving one another without judging or with conditions. Most of our children have some type of super selflishness that is evident in my father. Sincerity, mercy and grace are lacking from us all.
Ive tried but have been rejected too many times and I have shaken the dust off and have moved on knowing that my Lord and Saviour has everything under control. My two daughters are my two angels and my son is as hard and unloving and selfish as can be. He reminds me of my father, well two out of three isnt bad, and I know God will have His way with us all , Praise God He is sufficient for us all. Happy Fathers Day to all the fathers and to those of you who complain about your Dad, if your Dad tells you he loves you and talks to you hey that is a blessing, hang on to him and count your blessings…
Be blessed

By: blue-jay

blue-jay — Sat, 19 Jun 2010 16:39:54 +0000

I used to be the apple of my dads eye. It was great!!! Seems he was always snatching me up from …death …or so he thought. Once all of us and the nieghbors were sledding out on the “hill”…everyone went in for lunch except me. I found a good spot and snuggled into the snow drift. The sun was out and bright and warm…but it was michigan in january..freezing.. but not to me. When my dad snatched me up he took me in the house and put me in front of the fire. He was mumbling something ..not sure what.. and took off my mittens and boots and socks. He started to rub my hands and feet and realised…I was as warm as a stove top.. I was ok..I supprised and astonished him many times. I had a wonderful childhood with him. We swam and fished and played softball. He knew the answers to everything. All the neighborhood kids came over to play ball with us. He would grow a two acre garden with the most delicious veggies and strawberries. He taught us how to fish and hunt and track what we were hunting. It was “heaven” on earth!!! Unfortunatly I messed it all up. I have never been able to get back into his good graces..no matter how hard i tried..Now though i love him so… he has a brain disease called “ataxia”. It is the shrinking of the brain stem and voluntary muscle movement. He was “walking” …but now is in a wheel chair. He cant just answer the phone now …speech is only on a good day.