By: Nick

Nick — Fri, 30 Jul 2010 20:03:27 +0000

The stepmom is a bitch, she needs to understand the family bond which she doesn’t have and respect it or give up and leave if she is too proud. Giving ultimatums on a family matter like this shows the “quality” of her character, I feel sorry for the poor bastard that married her.

By: David Gurley

David Gurley — Wed, 09 Jun 2010 17:04:30 +0000

Thank you Dennis and Barbara,
Hope springs eternal in a parent’s heart.
After some twenty years as a single father of two young men, I married a woman coming out of a bout of breast cancer. She claims that her four cancer cures were, surgery, chemotherapy, radiation, and a divorce. Her first marriage was thirty years of mental/emotional abuse from an adult victim of a sexually abusive childhood. she spent most of her latter years in that marriage wedging herself between her hostile husband, and her youngest son, his chosen target for animosity.
Now, years later, her son is thirty-something, unable to retain any kind of normal, healthy interpersonal relationships. He expects negativity from me, and, thus, ‘twists ‘ any of my statements of opinion, or, offerings of positive advice, into verbal attacks. He interrupts with astoundingly unreasonable oblique references to an imagined animosity on my part. And, just yesterday, tried to instigate a physical altercation with me,(cursing,posing, verbal goadings…),knowing that his mother would fall into her traditional role of his protector and place herself between us.
Through much prayer empowered with praise, combined with a single father’s experiences in life and family therapy, I am made to think that my step-son is indeed congenitally, and mentally impaired.
He is a convicted felon,(drug sales), unrepentant, and full of anger. I can only pray for his serenity and Salvation from a distance, as he is unatainable to me.
I cannot sleep at night when he is in my house. He has broken the air of serenity and spiritual gratitude that Jesus has blessed us with…
Your reminder to us as married man and wife, having forsaken all others to come together, is apreciated.
I hope that you might have more suggestions as to how my step-son and I can free ourselves from this animosity.
Yesterday, when step-son was “trying to start a fight”, I sensed as I observed his and his Mother’s actions, in positioning of themselves, and how he waited until he was safely squared off with his mother between us before his verbal hazing became more profane and less respectfull,(ahem…), that they were going through a series of motions that they had been practicing for a long time with ‘someone else’. Later that evening when the boy wasn’t around, Jo Anne,(MOM), confirmed my suspicions. Now, I am made to think that this young man is a manipulator with a plan for agitation, taught him by his father.
I also am made to think that thirty years of standing between two people that one loves more than all others as they rage hatred at each other can cause cancer. Jo Anne’s first husband, is out of the picture, but I’m here, and step-son only knows animosity in a father-figure, so, he will attempt to enrage me, so MOM can show him that he’s still ‘her little boy’ when the “Three-in-a-row Screamers” are lined up.
I’m afraid that avoidance will be the only tool that help me get along with my step-son, Forrets.

Comments on: Dealing with an Older Stepson

By: Nick

By: David Gurley