I think a summary is in order here. There a few obvious differences that are intermingled here on this page: Proclaimed Christian or Non-Christian; Repentant or un-repentant; Is forgiveness an expectation or a gift; Be like Jesus, emulate Paul, follow the Holy Spirit, or expect one of those from others. The opposing viewpoints expressed in this comment thread are all based on a few assumptions by the writers; the challenge to us [as comment writers] is to figure out what those few assumption differences are so we can provide good feedback.

For everyone here, I leave you today with a thought to grapple with. Please look at 1 Corinthians 5 and focus on Verse 11; it could easily be about the context of forgiveness or the consequences of sin.

Jesus’ message was to the Jews who were living a ‘good moral life’ in their own strength but had lost their relationship of dependence on God. Paul’s message was more often to Gentiles who felt so unworthy of God’s love because they had grown up in worshipping false gods and immorality. The message of Jesus was “No matter how good you look on the outside there is no way that you can hide the evil that lurks in your heart. Come to me and be set free.” Paul’s message was, “God is not asking you to measure up to a standard in order to be made right with Him. Come to Jesus and be washed clean.” The message is the same but because it is directed to different people with different issues the emphasis of the message is different.

I must agree with what “D” is expressing here. We to have become dismayed with the excuses made for those in our church that refuse to obey simple commands layed out by our Savior such as forgiveness and many others. The majority of the church is following Pauline scripture instead of those of Yeshua. Those in the church have run rough shod over the original intent of the Son in the name of profit and free living under the Pauline principle of “Grace”, But Yeshua said “freely you have recieved, freely give” and also “If you love me you will obey my command”. No where do I read anything from Yeshua about nobody’s perfect! He says “be ye perfect, as your Father in heaven is perfect”
I know it was not your intent but you (brenda)fall perfectly inline with what I think “D” was trying to point out about todays christians.

D, you have obviously had painful experiences in the area of forgiveness, or lack thereof on the part of Christians. You seem to have a great deal of bitterness toward Christians and our failures in this particular area. I would point to one area of this article in particular that struck me:

“Forgiveness will challenge you to grow – to love more deeply and to learn more about life and interacting with people. But, more importantly, forgiveness will set you free!”

As Christians, we are not perfect, but growing toward serving Christ Jesus daily with the goal of allowing Him to transform us more and more into His image and likeness. Only Jesus forgave and forgives perfectly. I understand that it can be extremely disappointing when forgiveness is withheld, and especially so when it is not given on the part of Christ-followers. However, to paint all Christians with the brush of hypocrisy seems to me a harsh judgment. It is my prayer that your future experiences are much more healing and positive in Christ Jesus.

That’s a good point you bring up – the choice of forgiving without announcing it to the perpetrator. There may be ways however to express the forgiveness and yet making it clear to the perpetrator that there are still consequences to their actions. An interesting part of this article refers to how our capacity to forgive is rooted in our being forgiven. Ultimately, having a relationship with Christ would help give us discernment about the appropriate boundaries for each person that have harmed us so that we can be open to forgiving the perpetrator.

G —

Yes, forgiveness is not a simple manadatory obligation, and I might add, “superficial” …and yes, I agree that it is through faith that we accept repentance and be able to forgive others. The Holy Spirit gives us discernment.

I pray that the Lord continues to reveal to you both more wisdom and understanding about forgiveness. May He use you both to help others understand and grow as they grapple with forgiveness.

(G, regarding replies from the author, sometimes authors do reply and sometimes it may take a while.)

Aaron seems to take the seemingly legalistic but passive approach of required forgiveness in his comments about not removing people from your life and be Jesus but shares very accurately and concisely at the end of the comment “…forgive others of their sins when they repent…”. Forgiving one another as a result of repentance and giving your un-repented and un-validated abuse to God to deal with are two very different ways of receiving freedom from pain and suffering.

MCannon also has the idea that forgiveness is mandatory in all cases. Sharing “…only telling them once I no longer had to endure them as a part of my life” shows that MCannon intrinsically understands that abusers will be cut out of ones life especially with un-repented or repeated abuse and only once that occurs could freedom begin.

So, the right way [normally referred to with the word should] to receive freedom from pain and suffering is not as simple as mandatory forgiveness.

Also, the suggestion that real Christians attempt to be [act like] the all knowing God infused Jesus is a disturbing proposition; it is like suggesting that we all act like our parents to our family and act like our boss at work. Let us recognize that we are to follow Jesus and be led by the Holy Spirit. We cannot be Jesus if we are following Him; He has the power and we have the obedience. By faith we say Jesus knows ones heart, but we can only know actions and words; so by faith alone can we accept repentance and thus provide forgiveness.
I do hope that you all can and will understand and accept these basic truths.
I look forward to future comments on this thread especially from Lynette Hoy.

Your statement is very true and I agree with all that you have said.