What happens to the soul after suicide?

Written by Lynette Hoy NCC, LCPC

soulsuicideWhat happens to one’s soul/spirit after suicide?I recently had a close friend commit suicide and I am so worried that she will still not be at peace with herself. She had an anxiety disorder due to a troubled childhood and although she loved life, her friends, and her family, she just could not be independent as she could not relax.

We struggled together with this for so long. She was a creative and loving individual who had traveled much and lived away from us for a few years, so she had known independence. She feared for her sanity – she explained to me that she wanted to die because she actually did love herself and the constant thoughts going through her head would eventually turn into madness. I dearly love her and couldn’t bear to think that she will eternally go through this struggle. I am searching within myself to find meaning in my loss.

Advice: It’s obvious that you were and are a very close and loving friend. You have suffered with your friend right up to the end and beyond. You cared about her welfare, her emotional and spiritual state. But, now this tragedy has occurred and no matter what you or anyone tried to do – she has passed into eternity.

First of all, I want to tell you that your friend’s suicide and death was not anyone’s fault. Her suicide was the result of her choice and her psychological instability. Don’t let false guilt and self-blame take over. You and others tried to help. But, this woman is the one who made the choice despite all your pleadings and intervention.

Secondly, you need to grieve your friend’s death. You will go through several stages of loss: shock and denial, protest and dealing with the reality of her death, anger, confusion, depression and finally, reorganization. It’s normal to grieve. It’s important to care for yourself. You may need counseling. Go to your pastor for prayer and support. Read your Bible, especially the Psalms and the gospel of John. Jesus talks about God’s love for you and for the world, His plan to give you eternal life (John 3:16) and abundant life (John 10:10). Scripture will bring you comfort and hope for the future – hope for eternity.

The Bible does have stories about people who committed suicide but, it doesn’t talk about where their souls went – to heaven or to hell. But, Jesus promised: “I am the resurrection and the life – he who believes in me though he may die – yet shall he live.” John 11:25 If your friend trusted in Christ as her Lord and Savior – she is in heaven today. How do I know? Because Jesus said “I am the way, the truth and the life. No man comes to the Father but by me.” John 14:6

Jesus claimed to be God, to speak the truth and the words of God. He died on the cross for the sins of the whole world and then, rose from the dead on the their day. Over 500 witnesses saw the resurrected Christ!
Because of these facts – you can have great hope for the future! You can trust that Christ loved your friend greatly and will judge her justly.

Suicide is a devastating experience to those who loved its victim. Suicide happens because the person is so depressed and has not received the appropriate treatment – mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually.

But, suicide, though a sin, can be forgiven – at the foot of the cross where all sin is wiped away when one believes in the Savior who sacrificed Himself to redeem the world.

You will never feel comfortable with what happened. A life was lost. But, you can trust that God can bring good out of this circumstance. God can become more personal to you in this time of suffering. God can give you courage and make you a person of character with strong values. God can demonstrate His love and comfort to you during your pain. God can give you more wisdom to help others who have suffered.

This world is a broken place – a place that is not our home. We are just passing through. Your friend could not stand the emotional and mental turmoil she experienced. But, you can. You and God can go on.

She ended her stay on earth and God allowed her to do it. He did not cause her to do it because He is not the author of evil. He does allow people to make choices which are against His will. But, you can find hope and courage to discover God’s will for your earthly life. You can leave a legacy that will give others hope for tomorrow and for eternity.

If you find you are depressed and anxious because of this – see a counselor. You can find a counselor. God bless you as you discover what He has in store for you even in the midst of this loss.

Take a look at your life. How would you describe it? Contented? Rushed? Exciting? Stressful? Moving forward? Holding back? For many of us it’s all of the above at times. There are things we dream of doing one day, there are things we wish we could forget. In the Bible, it says that Jesus came to make all things new.

What would your life look like if you could start over with a clean slate?

Living with hope

If you are looking for peace, there is a way to balance your life. No one can be perfect, or have a perfect life. But every one of us has the opportunity to experience perfect grace through a personal relationship with God through His Son, Jesus Christ.

You can receive Christ right now by faith through prayer. Praying is simply talking to God. God knows your heart and is not so concerned with your words as He is with the attitude of your heart. Here’s a suggested prayer:

Lord Jesus, I want to know you personally. Thank you for dying on the cross for my sins. I open the door of my life to you and ask you to come in as my Savior and Lord. Take control of my life. Thank you for forgiving my sins and giving me eternal life. Make me the kind of person you want me to be.

Does this prayer express the desire of your heart? You can pray it right now, and Jesus Christ will come into your life, just as He promised.

Is this the life for you?

If you invited Christ into your life, thank God often that He is in your life, that He will never leave you and that you have eternal life. As you learn more about your relationship with God, and how much He loves you, you’ll experience life to the fullest.

Read more about faith
Read more about depression, anxiety, and fear
Read about grieving
Read more about suicide

Lynette Hoy, NCC, LCPC

© copyright 2003 Lynette Hoy, NCC, LCPC



333 Responses to “What happens to the soul after suicide?”

  • Trish Hicks says:

    Heavenly Father,
    I lift up Harshita to you Father,I ask you to comfort him and give him wisdom Father God Harshita is very troubled right now. I would ask if you could just put that peace in his heart of yours. Father God in your word it says come unto me you who are heavy laden and burdened. Father God Harshita is very burdened..I ask you draw Harshita nigh unto you Lord so that you can put your loving arms around him and tell him Father God that he will be alright. Its in the name of your Holy and mighty son I pray Father God,the Lord Jesus Christ.Amen.

  • Realistic says:

    Leave the part of who goes to heaven or not to God’s hands. Salvation is tied to faith in Jesus Christ through grace. All have sinned. Those who try to decide who goes to heaven or not, is trying to take Christ’s place, in simple words “wanting to be like the most high”, that sin was first done by Lucifer.

  • Chris says:

    dogman…sorry to hear you are struggling. why not share more in detail your situaion so we can step by step find the answers you need in Gods book of promises, the bible. God does have answers for you and all of us, but we must know the bible well to understand what they are. blessings!

  • DogMan says:

    People often say when it comes to suicide that God won’t give you more than you can handle or cope with but if that was true why do one million people a year commit suicide? Christians will say God will send people that commit suicide to hell for eternity. How could someone that believes in a just God think that if a person is so depressed or hopeless that they take their own lives tat God will send them to a place of torture and anguish for eternity. As someone who contemplates suicide daily I believe that if their is a God I give him or her way more credit than that. If God is real when you take your life you will end up in his or her forgiving loving arms.

  • Chris says:

    todd oh st univ….while its true that some rich christians let their riches go to their heads, paul is clear in 1 tim 6, that being rich in itself is not a sin. God will hold us all accountable based on luke 16 on how we have managed the money he gives us as good stwards or not. there is no need to make pre-judgments as jesus warned us not to in Matthew 7.1. romans 14 is also a good chapter to read for you where paul warns us not to judge another mans servant. our faith needs to be in christ alone with or without parents, with or without financial backing, with or without having been born into a wealthy home, jesus promises to provide for us if we will keep our eyes on him alone. heb 12, phil 4.19. blessings to you today!

  • Sharon says:

    to TODD OH ST UNIV– I am sorry you are struggling with life but why are you saying about Christians being rich ALL??? maybe some Christians don’t know the real reality of life but we don’t know what they do with their money do we??? but for me I go through some depression and have been through with very little or no money it is tough and it is a struggle to live and we do live in an apartment you are right JESUS when he was on the earth he slept outside or who know HE did tell some one that the SON of MAN had no place to lay his head I am praying for you.– Sharon

  • Todd OH ST UNIV says:

    all too often todays richy rich ”christians” are so out of touch with REAL reality they haven’t got a clue about how REAL christians struggle with despair and poverty, obviously there are less choices today than ever before, no jobs for college graduates, fuel at a record five dollars a gallon, no hope ,quite frankly many good decent folk would rather end their lives than sink low enough to have to be forced into a homeless shelter, to be forces to be around worthless alcoholics and drug addict sinners. again i say all the rich church people NEVER understand nor can relate to the REAL christians trapped in hopeless poverty who DONT HAVE ALL THE BIG CONNECTIONS to find work or jobs, and whose parents are already in Heaven and they HAVE NO ONE and are totally alone and cut off in isolation from all other human beings on the face of the earth, and whom are hammered and chastised on a daily basis for being poor and downtrodden by the meat grinder of life, was not Christ himself poor and homeless with no place to lay his head, i hope all the fat cat rich people think about that this holiday season, but they won’t as their behaviour is both classic and utterly predictable, they choose to worship only the foul stench of money, instead of bowing down before the true God above, truly the poor will enter thru the gates of Heaven long before any rich person, in fact on judgement day the Bible promises all the rich people will be punished while the poor will be rewarded with a crown of life for all the suffering they have been forced to endure.

  • Shelley says:

    Thank you both for your comments and I pray that the Lord our God will bless you both, in Jesus Name amen

  • halbcust says:

    Re: deep’s comments. There are many who believe this but also many who believe what scripture teaches and that is that we all will continue to live somewhere. Scripture also teaches that if one dies without committing their life to Jesus Christ they will indeed NOT leave all their troubles behind but they will have so much more that the ones they face now will seem small.
    Also while we are here we never know just how long our troubles will continue whereas if we die without Christ there is no turned back. No second chance.
    While we are alive here on earth we have the opportunity to know personally the God of second chances.

  • deep says:

    after death ……………nothing..
    leave the bad things
    someone said;alll problems wiil be solved .
    soo.. just move on

  • Jamie Jamie says:

    Hi Rin, did you know that you are significant to God? Jesus said that God knows everything about you even to such an extreme detail like the number of hairs on your head–He doesn’t have to count very high on my head :) Now I know that some people think, “How could God care about me when there are so many other people and so many other things to keep His attention?” The answer to that is in basic theoretical mathematics. Any highschool math student will tell you that if you take an infinite number and divide it by any number, the answer is still infinity. So if you take God’s infinite love, His infinite attention and divide it by the number of people who have ever and will ever live, you will find that each one of us is still the recipient of His infinite love and attention. You exist because God wants you to exist, and He loves you with and unlimited love, and His infinite attention is directed squarely on you, leading and guiding you to live out the perfect purpose for which He created you. And that is why you should live.

    Lord God, I pray for Rin and ask that he would be aware of Your infinite love in his life. Help him to recognize Your leading voice that is speaking to him even now. And let him get a sense of the plan that You have for him and his importance to you. Amen.

  • Jamie Jamie says:

    Hi Alifiya, I have talked with many people whose loved ones committed suicide and none of them say “It’s better that he/she ended their life.” In fact most of them go through terrible guilt thinking that they could/should have done something to stop the suicide. I imagine your loved ones would go through the same pain and guilt. I am sure you don’t want that for them, right?

    Before you do anything to hurt yourself, and put that kind of guilt on your loved ones, would you please call one of these numbers and talk with someone who can help you look at your situation in a different way and find other options to ending your lives, OK?
    Dial 911 in Canada and USA
    1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433) USA & Canada
    1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255) USA-National
    Hearing impaired call 1-800-799-4TTY (1-800-799-4889) USA
    Centerstone(Suicide Crisis Call Center) 1-800-273-TALK (8255) USA
    There are good people there who care about you.

    So what is happening in your life that has brought you to the place of considering suicide? Why do you think your loved ones are better off without you?

  • Rin says:

    Good evening first of all, and i belive that i shouldn’t go down just yet….of a hundred white candles, the red flame creates the darkness of a million shadows….thats me, but anyway thank you for your help…but……….just because you exist doesn’t give a reason to live…..after all……whats my reason, who am i?

  • Alifiya says:

    Hi, idk wats wrong wid me.. I counseled too but not finding solution. So I thougt to suicide… It wl b good for my beloved ones… Coz dey r dying bcoz of me so it’s better to end my life

  • Chris says:

    roxy…i regret hearing of your cousins friend. death is terrible in whatever form it comes in since God in the beginning had never planned for us to die. what is important is that we understand that death comes to all eventually and we need to be ready through our spiritual relationship with christ who has conquered death through his resurection. life can be very challenging and without having a saving relationship with christ, may very well be too hard to handle and as some do, end it on their own. for more information on knowing jesus personally in your life so you can overcome the problems that come your way log onto…knowingjesuspersonally.com or click talk to a mentor above. i pray jesus would help you to see the life he is offering you, life in abundance and victory over even death through everlasting life amen

  • Roxy says:

    I have a friend who’s cousin committed suicide. I saw her ig and fb posts and towards the end you can tell something was terribly wrong and no one seemed to notice. From what I know she hung herself in a hotel room. And no one understands why. I’ve wondered so many times as to what and why was she driven to that point when her life seemed so full of love. It’s also started to make me obsessively curious as to what happens after death and after suicidal death. I’m so curious and keep imagining myself doing it to find the answers. Curiousity suicide?

  • Chris says:

    angel…sorry to hear of your friend. its important to find out what is bothering her in order to remedy the situation. many people have abuse in the family that they cannot live with. its important that that be addressed as a possible issue. also, the only real way of having peace in this life is by having a personal relationship with jesus christ as our lord and savior. he is for all of us. to know more about having the peace of christ in your and your friends heart, log onto…knowingjesuspersonally.com or click talk to a mentor above. i pray jesus would come into your heart and your friends heart so you both can know the peace that passes all understanding amen!

  • angel says:

    hii today mrng my frnd commited sucide bcz of physical tensions in home…… how to stp sucide thoughts ovr her cn u help me pls

  • Chris says:

    gb….i regret to hear of your difficulties. yes, death by any form is tragic since God in the beginning never had intended for people to die. the pressures of living this life without christ are unbearable. neither had God ever intended us to live life without him. it cant be done successfully. i encourage you to focus on him who is life, christ jesus. there is nothing we can do for those who have left this world but we can do something about our own lives and helping others to avoid needless suicides. please click on knowingjesuspersonally.com to find out more about living a true life through jesus or click talk to a mentor above. i pray jesus would relieve you of this depression, open your eyes to the inheritance he has died to give you and bring you new life today in him amen!!

  • gb says:

    I first found this page in 2012. A very very good friend of mine committed suicide and the lain I endured was so bad, almost unbearable. I cried for days til my eyes were swollen.after that I had a co worker commit suicide and was more aware of all the recent suicides. I looked up suicide rates and even how long it takes a person to die by suicide. I had to go to the bridge where jr jumped and look down. I had to see what he saw. I still texted him to tell him updates on my life. Just things that others would consider crazy. Ive never experienced such a tragic loss before. Fast fwd 2 years and my kids father, whom I’ve knowm for 20 years committed suicide. This was a bit more tragic as he didnt die right away. He was on life support and brain dead til eventually his family took him off life support. I had to explain to my 8 yr old and 16 yr old that their dad has passed away. I waa unable to see him in the hospital due to family dusputes and due to finances there was no service and no grave. My greiving was different. At first I seemed ok, then q couple months later it just all hit me like a train. I miss him so much, even though we were divorced.i feel bad for every mean thing ive ever said and sad that this year when it was bring dads to school day that my sons dads seat was empty. Every night I have nightmares. Most of the time I dream he is alive, he isnt dead but was sentenced to a long time in prison. Other nights I dream that I killed him and other times I wake up forgetting that hes really gone. I want to feel normal again. I want to be happy. I am on depression meds. Any advice would be great.

  • gloria says:

    I really hope you changed your mind. I am a survivor of suicide. Ive had my husband, ex b, uncle and good friend commit suicide. If you only knew all the pain left for others to live.you were meant to be in this world. There is ALWAYS HOPE. please tell me you changed your mind.

  • Chris says:

    rin….i regret to hear of your discouragement. perhaps you and your friend are having problems being accepted by your families or peers, i dont know but i can tell you God loves you and he has placed you both here for a great reason and purpose that you can trust him about regardless of any circumstances that seem to indicate otherwise but we must let God through jesus christ take over our lifes situations. after all, he put us here. wouldnt He be able to keep us here in a peaceful and prosperous way? surely he would. if you want to know more on how to live peacefully and prosperously through faith in God, please click…knowingjesuspersonally.com or click talk to a mentor above. God has answers for your lives. there is no need to resort to self-killing of oneself ever. that is never the answer. i pray now that christ would come to you both. that you both would sense his love and presence with you now so that you can begin living happily according to the plan God has for you in his wonderful Son jesus christ. amen!

  • Jamie Jamie says:

    Hi Rin, I am sorry to hear that you and your love have had such a hard time and feel like the best option is end your lives. What has happened that leaves you with that as your best option?

    You asked about whether you would rest in peace together in Heaven: that’s not an answer that anyone on Earth is able to answer for you. What I can say is that anyone who recognizes that they have rebelled against God and His plan for their life, who believes that Jesus is the Son of God who gave up His life to pay the penalty for humanity’s rebellion against Him, and who is following Jesus every day and trusting in Him to lead them through every circumstance in life so that they can proclaim the love, wisdom and power of God to all of Creation, that person has a place in Heaven prepared for him/her. Jesus said, “God so loved the World that He gave His only begotten Son, so that whoever believes in Him will not perish but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16) Jesus also said, “Come to Me all of you who are weary and weighed down; I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28) Jesus also taught us to look to God for His will to be done in our lives. He said that God cares for all of our needs so we don’t have to be anxious about anything; instead we should be intent on making God and HIs righteousness known to everyone and trust God to give us what we need (Matthew 6:33)

    All of those things that Jesus said seemed to suggest that suicide is not part of God’s plan and purpose for you. Is it your desire to do God’s will?

    I know that life may seem really difficult right now but God has not forgotten about you. He loves you and has a perfect plan for your life. Have you ever experienced God’s love?

    Let me pray for you: Dear Jesus, Rin is in a desperate spot and needs Your help. Would You help Rin to realize Your great love and would You rescue Rin and Rin’s love from going against Your plan and ending their lives? Amen.

    I would love to hear back from your Rin. But I recognize you may need to talk to someone right away. Call one of these numbers and talk with someone who can help you look at your situation in a different way and find other options to ending your lives, OK?
    Dial 911 in Canada and USA
    1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433) USA & Canada
    1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255) USA-National
    Hearing impaired call 1-800-799-4TTY (1-800-799-4889) USA
    Centerstone(Suicide Crisis Call Center) 1-800-273-TALK (8255) USA

  • lookingup says:

    Hi Rin,

    Why would you want to take such a huge risk? If you do not go to heaven you would be in a place of eternal torment. Here at least there is always hope.

  • Rin soatome says:

    Um…..hi….my name is Rin….and im going to commit suicide with my love at 12:00 tonight….is it possible we can rest in peace together in heaven

  • Jamie Jamie says:

    Hi Shannon, I am so sorry to hear about your loss. Was your brother older or younger than you? Did he have a family of his own? How has your family responded to his death?

    Let me pray for you: Dear Jesus, I ask that You would comfort Shannon and the rest of the family and friends who are grieving the loss of this young man. I am sure they all have so many questions running through their minds and very few answers. I pray that You would help bring peace to their heart. Give them confidence in You provision for them and for this young man. Bring people into their life who can support and love them through their pain and free them from the feelings of guilt and regret. Amen.

    Shannon, what kind of support do you have in your life? Are there people who are caring for you? A couple in my church have been going through the pain of their son’s suicide and I know that this is not easy to live with in isolation. You need friends and family that can care for you.

  • Sharon says:

    to Harshita– my sympathy to you on the loss of your loved one may God comfort you at this time I am praying for you.

  • Shannon McBee says:

    Hi Harshita, I know what you are going thru as I lost my brother 2 months ago to suicide he just turned 29. I have the same questions… My heart and prayers go out to you.. I will keep you In my prayers!

  • Shelley says:

    Dear Father God.

    Lord I lift up Ever ready to You, that You will bless them and there family, in Jesus name Amen

  • Ever ready says:

    Thank you Chris for those wise words!

  • Barbara Alpert Barbara Alpert says:

    Dear Harshita, I am so sorry to hear about your tragic loss.Only God knows the true condition of each person’s inner battle and thoughts. I pray that God’s Spirit blesses you with His comfort and peace, letting you know that your loved one is okay and is at rest.

    Please realize that God does not expect you to go through this season of loss alone. May you realize through a commination of reaching out to God’s Word, His Spirit, family, church, and perhaps a local support group…you will be lead to further understanding and healing for yourself.

    Here are a few links to support groups that will perhaps benefit you during this season of loss.



    May God’s blessings of peace, healing, and fullness of life be with you and your loved ones! In Jesus’ name, Amen

  • Chris says:

    harshita…i am terribly sorry to hear of your loss. death by any means is always tragic for us who live in this world. the only real hope we have is the one jesus christ offers us who rose from the dead, after dying for our sins on the cross. those who have gone on are now in a different world altogether. those of us who are here have the opportunity of being able to live with God forever through receiving our forgiveness that jesus purchased for us on the cross when he the innocent, paid the guilt of us the guilty ones. with the knowledge we all must leave this world one day, doesnt it make sense to be prepared through faith in christ? if you would like more information on how to receive your personal forgiveness which we all need, log onto, knowingjesuspersonally.com or click talk to a mentor above. i pray jesus confort you now with the hope that as you seek christ for your own life, you will have the assurance of your own salvation and help othrs to have thiers as well amen!

  • harshita says:

    I am very upset as the person I loved truely has committed suicide.I am unable to understand what should I do? I am worried about him whether he is living peacefully or not.i want him to be happy where ever he is right now.please pray.

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