The Effects of Internet Pornography
Internet pornography’s accessibility, affordability and anonymity have helped the porn industry reach a whole new level. People no longer have to drive to an adult store to get porn, for it is readily available at the click of a mouse. Porn has been normalized to the point where most men are not hiding their liking of porn, but embracing it. Some women have even become addicted to viewing porn on the web. As pornography is more common because of the Internet, it has taken a larger role in our lives. Some have been hurt by it, some have been able to entertain more fantasies because of it and some have even made a fortune from it.
Pornography and relationships
Internet pornography hurts marriages. Wives feel betrayed by their husband’s need to go online to be sexually satisfied. Nine months after her wedding, Donna found out her husband never stopped viewing online porn as he had promised. She was stunned and hurt. Describing her feelings about it she said, “I blamed myself–I wasn’t attractive enough.”
Another woman described her feelings towards her husband’s online pornography habit this way, “It makes me feel fat and ugly, like he’d rather masturbate to those images than have the real thing.” Oftentimes the wife is hurt when she discovers her husband’s addiction to cyberporn because she feels she is not enough to fulfill her husband’s sexual fantasies. Some wives blame themselves for not having a body sexy enough to satisfy their husbands. According to Ana Bridges et al. in the article, “Romance
Partners’ Use of Pornography: Its Significance for Women,” “In her eyes, his involvement [in internet pornography] implied that she must be physically unattractive, sexually undesirable, worthless, [and] inadequate as a wife.”
Erotic images are more available than ever, and according to comScore, which measures Internet traffic, 66 percent of Internet-using men between the ages of 18 and 34 look at online porn at least once a month. Porn-gazing can become an explosive issue for a couple, corroding intimacy and diminishing sexual connection. Some may think that only chronic porn surfing can negatively affect a marriage, but they are wrong—even casual porn gazing can become an obstacle in a marriage.
Two-thirds of divorce lawyers say that the Internet has played a significant role in divorces within the past year, with excessive interest in online porn contributing to more than half of such cases. According to Richard Berry, president of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, “Pornography had an almost nonexistent role in divorce just seven or eight years ago;” its significant role now is “clearly due to the Internet.” Online pornography has evidently devastated the relationship between husband and wife, sometimes shattering it completely.
Pornography and children
Internet pornography has become an issue for parents and their children. With younger people being more technologically inclined, parents who are not up-to-date with technology are not able to control their children’s activity on the web. Seventy percent of 15-to-17-year-olds said that they had accidentally come acrosspornography online, according to a 2001 poll by the Kaiser Family Foundation.
Many wonder about the consequences of viewing pornography at a young age. Are children becoming more sexual? How does this affect the mentality of boys and girls? In another poll, 59 percent of 15-to-24-year-olds believe that seeing porn on the Internet encourages young people to have sex before they are ready; 49 percent said it promotes bad attitudes toward women and encourages viewers to think unprotected sex is O.K. The web is shaping the views and values of children, sometimes even more than parents, whether we like to admit to it or not. Sociologist Diana Russell, who has written several books on the subject of web porn’s influence on children, claims: “Unfortunately for many kids growing up today, pornography is the only sex education they’ll get.”
Pornography and the church
Perhaps surprising to some, Internet pornography has become an issue within the church. It is a personal problem for 40 percent of American pastors. According to Christianity Today, 51 percent of pastors admit that looking at Internet pornography is their biggest temptation. In a case at the Seventh-Day Adventist Church in Desoto, Texas, no one suspected that Pastor Bernie Anderson, 36, was secretly spending hours looking at porn on the web. He was a firm believer in the literal word of the Bible, a happily married man and father of three. He was compassionate and loving, always there to lend an ear. But he felt like a hypocrite. Johnson and Schenfeld describe his struggle:
He tried to stop, but the images flickered again. After one porn binge, he decided he could no longer live with himself. He called a fellow pastor and confessed: “I’m a pastor addicted to porn.” The response startled him. “You’re not alone.”
Later, Anderson enrolled in a five-day treatment program, where ministers gathered in groups to talk about the issue. Reminded of God’s grace and complete forgiveness through Jesus Christ, he learned to forgive himself, and says he has stayed clean.
Internet pornography has become a big enough issue that the Christian church has taken initiative to help people stop. XXXchurch.com, Pureonline.com and Stephen Arterburn and Fred Stoeker’s Every Man’s Battle are just a few helpful tools in the battle for sexual integrity.
Experience freedom
“Online pornography was something in my life I felt chained to. I needed forgiveness and freedom from the guilt. Jesus gave me that,” said a man who has stayed clean for years. Jesus Christ offers complete forgiveness and true freedom. God sacrificed his son Jesus on the cross to die for all of our sins. No matter what we’ve done or how much guilt we may feel, Jesus gave up his life for us so that we can be completely forgiven. He rose from the dead after three days and offers us the gift of grace—ultimate freedom from any guilt, pain or addiction.
He offers you that same gift of freedom. As Rusty Wright said in his article, “Dynamic Sex,” “Jesus offers forgiveness from every wrong—no matter what—that we’ve ever done because He died on the cross in our place, bearing the punishment we deserved. Anyone can be completely forgiven if he or she will come to Christ. God can cleanse a person’s mind of all past guilt. He can restore the freedom of mutual love and trust in a relationship.”
You can begin a new life of freedom by believing and accepting Jesus Christ. You can receive Christ right now by faith through prayer. Praying is simply talking to God. God knows your heart and is not so concerned with your words as He is with the attitude of your heart. Here’s a suggested prayer:
Lord Jesus, I want to know you personally. Thank you for dying on the cross for my sins. I open the door of my life to you and ask you to come in as my Savior and Lord. Take control of my life. Thank you for forgiving my sins and giving me eternal life. Make me the kind of person you want me to be. Amen.
This website has most definitely improved what once was my vulgar lifestyle. Thank you powertochange.com, although I struggle with everyday urges, I appreciate all of your help.
Thanks! :-)
Lord Jesus, I want to know you personally.
I WOULD LIKE TO JOINT THE BIBLE SCHOOL
MY COMMENT IS GOOD TO BELIFE IN WHAT GOD CAN DO FOR THE WORLD AND HELP PEOPLE
Good morning,
I need help with my porn addiction. It is hurting my wife and really hurting my marriage. My wife says she will leave me if i don’t get help for it but i don’t see it being a problem for me.
Can someone contact me to discuss some options that xan help me and my marriage?
Thank you
Edward
when you submit yourselves to God; there is lot of differences you can do; for you in yourselves wants new things of your life; for the first is love your self,respect your self; for God accept you as whole being and by Him He will change you by His words How? for the beliefs of a husbands and wives “there is give and take relationship so when God teach you, try to obey His laws, try to apply His word into your life and see the next thing? for the word you apply there is coming of trials How? as it said James 1:14-18
but each of one is tempted when by His own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed, then after desire has conceived it gives birth to sins and sins when it is full grown gives birth tp death.
so the best thing you will do; discipline yourselves like if you have those copy in your house or internet delete, try to avoid borrowing tapes and if you have this in your house like magazines throw it out all in garbages why? it will harm into heart and minds and sometimes maybe
it will start a big conversation of wife and you
then do lots of exercise, like jogging,badmintton,soccer,orpingpong make yourselves busy for the whole day. and try to read one two scriptures a day like here or in thoughts for today and you will get lot of wisdom that you can apply to yourselves and your family
and if satans attacking you pray, for prayers it
helps a lot in our daily living, ask God to guide
you in His teaching and tell to God you want to
change your habit coz this is main of LQ(lovers quarell) of your wife, and if you are sincere in
your prayers, God give you ideas that you can do
for each day that may your walk truly in His way.
for its like a cigarette cannot avoid right away
but its on you; if you want to save your good
relationship of your family, you can do it, for
you are the head of your family,and think always
we are likeness of God.
for in the end God will judge all people according
their deeds and works they done in life even its
small or big.
as it said Mathew 6:22-23
The eye is the lamp of the body;if your eyes is good your whole body is full of light, but if your eyes is bad your whole body is full of darkness;if then the light within you is darkness;how great that darkness…..:/
Thank you
Laurie Wang
very inspiring and educational to all. a good
reminders to all youth and to all have a family. God bless and more power in power to change ministries, its help a lot to change the world,
as it said in Psalm 1:1
blessd is the man who does not walk in the councel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers.
In Jesus name
Amen
Hi Edward,
I apologize for the delay in responding to you. At your request I have sent your comment on to one of our mentors. You should get an email from him in the next couple of days.
Claire
PowertoChange.com
hello sir i need your help. i know everything this is bad but when i alone in my home everyday i start to watch those website and waste my 2hrs every day and its harm my study and health and my eye… i am single and 25 yrs old man this addiction is from last 4 years and everyday i want to come out of this thing but i can’t. it is like two part of the mind one is syas u have to watch and one is says you do not……
HELP ME THIS A LAST HOPE FOR ME……
I am in serious trouble………..
Hi Nike,
I have sent your comment on to one of our mentors. You should hear from him in the next couple of days.
Claire
My husband was addicted to porn and masturbating up until 2004 – when it all came out. He went to “Avenues for Men” and I went to “Avenues for Women” for 2 years. Since then, he’s had “weak moments”. Here’s the real issue: we don’t have a healthy, intimate, sex life. How can we when he learned sexuality through porno? Even after all this time after he’s “stopped”, the lasting effects are still so harmful. I’m going to be 46 this year and now face getting older… I feel robbed!
Hi Eileen,
I don’t have an answer for you but my heart breaks for you. Would you like me to match you with someone on our mentoring team that can help work this through with you?