He needs to hear the full unadulterated gospel of grace. When he talks to you next time, just listen to what he has to say and make him know that he is entitled to feel how he wants and that he is entitled to his own views. Don’t scold him for his views even if they are wrong. Make him know thou that you have your own views. Drop a word of encouragement, (the word of God) and allow the Holy Spirit to move on that word in him. We sometimes take the job of the Holy Spirit, which unable him to work. I’ve done it lots of time but did not realise it cuz I was so zealous for a guy to get saved then I can marry him but I blew it lol. Actually it’s not funny but I could not understand why he can not see the beauty in Christ like I can. I was doing the work of the Holy Sprit, who can handle it. All God wants for us to do is be a witness, not a convicta.

There are a number of preachers that are preaching the gospel of pure grace, Andrew Wommack, and Joseph Prince. You can google them or watch them on Sky, on God channel. They would blow your mind, it is awesome. They show the full love of God, I feel so alive and learning much much much and I feel on top of the world. It’s amazing. If you can go on there website and listen to them or order their materials, I tell you, you would be so so much more happier cuz they got it and they are persecuted badly like Paul in the NT was for preaching radical grace. That is what we need to hear more and that is what the world need to hear, but instead, we are hearing religion, which stinks.

You Kimi, determine the direction you want to go once and for all and get some good radical grace teachings and let him know this is the direction you are heading in and be devoted, don’t tell him, he has to too, cuz it will transform you in many ways over time and he will see it, the joy, the peace, the love, the energy and that will attract him. Don’t let him feel like you are forcing him in anyway but if he says something negative about you – condemn those words by using Christ words, eg, he may say something about your walk with Christ that it is not perfect, you can reply, those are your words and you are entitled to them but I know who I am, I am the righteousness of God through Christ Jesus and has he is, so am I in this world. WHY MUST YOU SAY THIS? Cuz, words that are negative, if not challenged straight away, can affect our belief in Christ. Bad words are damaging. That is why Jesus challenged satan with , it is written it is written etc. You know, we put limitations on God – the religious world does and we follow and so your partner would have disapproved of that too and thinking like I thought once, there has got to be more and there is, better. God never said, we might know the truth and the truth shall set us free but we shall know the truth…….

Go to God with that and stand on that scripture and say Lord, I need to know more about what is happening, about you and pour out your heart to him and pray for your partner and leave it there, trusting that God will help you in that. Thank God every day for the answer and while you are praying, believe before you end the prayer that God has the answer as Andrew Wommack stated, Christ has anticipated everything, (problem you will faced before you were born). He has an answer for everything. Then get in his word to suit your circumstances and if you can listen to those two teachers, even better also and ask the Holy Ghost to lead you in this IN FAITH that he will. Then live your life and thank God for the answer every day and draw what you need from Jesus every day and even if you have to change church, be led by that and know that what ever happens, more arguments, that Christ is the beginning and the end. He is the beginning of your circumstances and he shall be the end. So whatever anyone says, Christ will have the finale say. We must trust in his love and that no weapon formed against us shall prosper. Satan can not win Kimi. Cuz your first importance is your relationship and what you know about Christ, make that first, seek his Kingdom and his Righteousness and all things will be added on to you. Christ wants you in peace and joy constantly and let that radiate through to your fiancé. Things may take time to manifest, but rejoice always, cuz you have the victory. Is all this easy, probably not but that is where we have to battle to enter his rest.

I wish you all the best and thanks for your post.

God bless you both

Preachers rarely talk about the cross, what Christ has given up for us, what is ours, unless they want an offering, who we are, what we own, what we are entitled too, how special and loved we are and how much we are just like Christ and that God loves us unconditionally weather we do good or bad.

Instead, they preach, we must be perfect and do well and give to God always our love, time, energy and love our neighbours and do good and then God will favour us, then we will be righteous, then we will be holy, then God will love us more and he will bless us and hear us when we pray. This paragraph spills out the wrong gospel. When people, especially young people leave church, it is not because they are bad. They are leaving church or finding fault with a message at church and then blaming God and the preacher because they just heard religion. If we sin and are suffering, we are suffering cuz we sinned. Every other religion does this. Being Born Again is different. Because no 1. We are righteous by faith, Romans 1:17 (Jesus righteousness and not our own) and there are other scriptures to back this up. We are seated in heavenly places, Ephesians 2:6 – yet preachers make us feel like we are below and not above cuz we are not perfect in our conduct. And in many scriptures, it talks about how much God loves us: Psalms 91:14 – Romans 5:5 Romans 5:8 -Proverbs 3:12 – Ephesians 2:4 – Solomon 2:4 – Hosea 2:23 – Romans 8:25 and a whole lot more.

This is important because they way things are going, many people think God loves them conditionally thanks to wrong teachings and it overwhelms people but Jesus came to be used and to draw constantly from him. Then we will be able to give unto him back and to others but our vessels need to be filled with him daily first. Look at the woman at the well, she came out in the afternoon to draw water cuz she felt ashamed to draw water with the other women in the morning cuz of her sinful lifestyle. Jesus knew she needed him and he was tired and his disciples went to get food. When they saw him, he obviously looked more radiant cuz they said, who gave him something to eat and they were surprised he was left alone with a woman. This is cuz the woman drew from him and it refreshes him when we treat him like God, cuz that is what and that is what he is; so we need to depend on him for strength, then we are able to give back to others and to him cuz we are filled. Mary and Marther, Mary did what was needful, she drew from the Lord and he commended her for that. She ended up anointing Jesus and John who says his one whom Jesus loves; you can only find that in the book of John lol. He drew from the Lord and knew how much Christ loves him and was able to be there when Jesus needed him the most – at the cross and he was instructed to take care of Mary, (Jesus mother).

So when we draw from the Lord constantly, we are able to be at the right place at the right time in service. Jesus came to be used of us. Say that in a church today, they will call it blasphemy. Too much religion and religious people are the most hateful, spiteful, and uncaring of the Christian group. Cuz they are the enemies of the cross of Christ and they make the word of God of non effect. So I commend your fiancé, cuz it is the Holy Ghost that is making him know that there is something wrong if he is being taught religion. Jesus never died for religion; in fact they were the ones that were trying to kill him, not the prostitutes or the tax collectors. God wants us to have a relationship with him and to use him. His God, he can handle it but I was taught in the past, don’t bother God, leave him alone, you keep asking him to help you to bless you to help you overcome things. Don’t you think God is tired of it. You are like parasites to him. Yea Kimi, you have preachers that are cursing God’s people. Some do it out of ignorance but Christ said, without me, you can not do a thing. It is imperative to draw from him every day and our past present and future sins are all not covered, but destroyed, at the cross. God has already provided everything through grace. We are not taught to rest in the Lord, but rather, if we pay our tithes and offerings, if we obey God every word, if we are kind to neighbours etc etc etc, then we are worthy to rest in the Lord. But GOD SAID TO LABOUR TO ENTER HIS REST. We will have peace in our lives instead of stress. Your partner probably sees people getting worked up over other Christians that are not dressed the standard of the church, they may wear too much make up, they are not conservative enough, there are all these steps to take before you can get close to God but Jesus done it for us so that we can get close to God, as close as Jesus is too God. Religious people would hate this post of mines cuz it takes away their confidence in themselves as Paul showed the Galatians church in Galatians 5: 11. Your partner is rebelling against the false gospel praise God. Galatians 5:3 is a fundamental statement that Paul said, but it needed to be said.

Many religions observe the days, what to eat, what to wear, how to sit, especially for women, how to conduct themselves in their personalities but Christ gave us all our unique personalities and so if he has observed these things, he is not rebelling against God, he is rebelling against religion that would make the cross of Christ of non-effect in his life. He is smart Kimi.
PT 1

I was able to get to talk to my fiancé a bit about our problem a day after I wrote down my comment here. He thought that the joke he made was fine – to think that there are worse but I explained to him that anything that makes fun of God offends me and he apologized and respected it. He also explained that he believes in God – it’s just that he doesn’t believe in religion. I really find it hard to understand. It’s actually where our debate began because I told him that anything can be his god. He must be firm in which “god” he pertains to. Honestly we had a very long debate about it until I realized that it was becoming too aggressive and I dropped it. I don’t want to fight and argue. Now I see that he still have some faith in God but he is very confused and rebelling against the Church.

I hope you would take time to read this because I also would like to hear what you think. He was raised a catholic and served in their church. He knew most of the Bible and like me, was very active in our younger years in the church. As he grew up, he saw the corruption of the elders and the hypocrisy of some members. Same with me (I’m from a Baptist church) – I saw corrupt people and ‘Pharisee’ like people which drove me away from attending every Sunday until I finally stopped. We shared this same disappointment but I told him that despite that I firmly believe in God and Jesus as our savior. He told me that he did too. Now, according to our conversation last night, he said that he does believe in God, the One in the Bible, and that he believes in Jesus and that He will save him. But he hates evangelical talk. He said that he’s heard it over and over again.

Like what I’ve read in this article, I try not to push the topic. Today he had a big problem at home which got him really depressed. I helped him make some decisions until he was able to deal with it before the day ended. In my messages to him, I told him to pray and that God will help. He didn’t respond to that and by the time we talked he said that he forgot to since he was in deep thought. I figured that he was just avoiding the topic. Then I thought maybe some of these things are happening so he would learn to call upon God once more. He relies on himself too much.

Knowing these facts, I hope you can give me a bit more advice on how I can talk to him even if it takes some time. I’m sure God has a plan for him too because my fiancé knows about salvation and about Him so I never think it’s too late for him. I’m also sure that I was introduced to him for a reason. My fiancé always thanks me for changing his life. When we met, many things have changed and we both stopped bad vices. He treats me as the most important person in his life and that being with me caused him to become better. If I leave him because of this, I think that he will blame God and hate Him for “taking me away” – then I would’ve failed, instead of bringing him closer I might even drive him away.
I thank you again! Please take your time, its okay if you find it too long and not respond at once but I hope you still can. God bless you all! And I thank Him for leading me to this site.

The difference between true Christianity and being a Muslim or a Buddish or a Jehovah Witness is that true Christianity is not religious but the rest are and Jesus never died for religion; in fact it was the religious fanatics in the NT – that were always trying to kill him. I know the two can not mix but it is up to you what you do but if I was you, I would not even consider marrying him cuz his beliefs so differ from yours and there will be much conflict. Please think about this very carefully. There is a reason why you found this wonderful website. You need encouragement not to do something you may 90% I beleive, you will regret.Take your time, for your sake. Jesus is right there if you need him.

All the best for the future and I hope you make a wise decision for your sake.

God bless you and have a great day

But as I wrote to Kimi, it is a dangerous road that you walk by being so intimately connected with him. There have been situations where a Christian saw their spouse become a follower of Jesus but I have also known so many who have lived through miserable marriages because they did not share a faith in Jesus. They have said to me, “Just tell people ‘Don’t do it! It is such a painful life!’” A dear friend of mine just buried her unbelieving husband. You cannot imagine the grief that she has suffered knowing that she was not able to help her husband discover forgiveness in Jesus Christ before he died, no all the years that they have lived together but the feeling of separateness because they could not share the most intimate of aspects of their faith together.

Lord God, I do pray for Jenny’s boyfriend. Help him to discover the truth of new life and forgiveness in Your Son, Jesus. Help Jenny to be able to reflect Your character in a way that would draw this man into a relationship with You. Give Jenny wisdom to know how to speak to him and live out her life as a testimony of the power of Your transforming love. Guide her in the path that You want her to follow and use this painful experience to strengthen her love and commitment to You. In Jesus’ name, amen.

Jenny, ley me also invite you to talk with one of our online mentors. They will help you find the parts of the Bible that will help you hear what Jesus is saying to you. You will find a Mentor Request Form at http://powertochange.com/experience/talk-to-a-mentor.

I say all that because it has a direct impact on the issue of being a relationship with someone who does not share that same relationship with Jesus. The more that you reflect the character of Jesus the more tension there is going to be in the relationship. Jesus said, “If the world hates you, you know that it has hated Me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, because of this the world hates you. Remember the word that I said to you, ‘A slave is not greater than his master.’ If they persecuted Me, they will also persecute you;” (John 15:18-20) Your life will be a constant reminder that they have not accepted the life that Jesus has to offer and that will be like a burr under the saddle, continually rubbing and creating a sore. The comments your fiancé is making is part of his rejection of Jesus and it comes out at you. The outcomes of that are going to be either he sees in you the truth and comes to faith in Jesus, or he continues to berate your faith and you choose to minimize that in your life and reflect less the character of Christ or you remain faithful and his anger towards you grows and grows.

I think FIFI has given you good counsel: postpone your marriage, and solidify your commitment to Christ. Pray for God to bring your fiancé to a place of surrender to Christ. As your relationship with Jesus is strengthened you will recognize Jesus leading and be better able to follow Him in the path that He has planned for you. Jesus said, “My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me” (John 10:27) A follower of Jesus never needs to be confused about the direction of life because Jesus speaks clearly when He wants us to act. If you are confused it is always best to stop and listen more intently to what He is saying.

Lord Jesus, I pray for Kimi. I ask for clarity for her. You have promised to lead her in the best path for her but right now she is confused about what to do. Help her to know what it is that You are saying to her and give her the courage and strength she will need to follow You no matter where it is that You lead.

I also pray for her fiancé. Help him to see the authentic relationship that Kimi has with You and give him the desire for that himself. Set him free from the rebellion that he has against You and bring him into the new life that You offer to all who believe and surrender their lives to Your direction. Amen.

Kimi, let me invite you to talk with one of our online mentors. They can help pray with you and discover together what Jesus is saying to you. You will find a Mentor Request Form at http://powertochange.com/experience/talk-to-a-mentor.