Becoming a Woman of Virtue
Making it personal
“Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands” (Proverbs 14:1).
- Am I building up my house or tearing it down?
- Am I investing in my marriage? Am I nurturing the heart of my marriage?
- Do I frequently express admiration and gratitude to my husband?
- Am I reserving the best of my physical and emotional energy for my family?
- Am I creating a climate (through words, actions, and attitudes) that makes my husband want to be at home?
- Am I content to be “at home”? Am I finding my “fulfillment” through reverencing and serving my husband and family?
- Do I reserve intimate communication, looks, words, and touch for my husband? Am I giving of my emotions, attention, affection to a man other than my husband?
- Am I meeting my husband’s sexual needs?
- Am I trustworthy? Is there any behavior or relationship I am involved in that I am keeping from my husband? Have I been totally honest with my husband?
- Does my husband have the freedom to be totally honest with me?
- Am I fueling sensual thoughts and desires through books, magazines, TV programs, music, or movies that are not morally pure?
- Have I become a “refuge” for a man who may be struggling in his marriage?
- Am I looking to a man other than my husband (pastor, counselor, colleague) to be a primary source of counsel or to fill an emotional vacuum in my life?
- Do I have a more intimate relationship–physically, emotionally, or spiritually–with any man than I do with my husband?
- Does my demeanor tend to be “loud and defiant,” or do I communicate a meek, quiet, and submissive spirit?
- Am I a “wall” or a “door” (Song of Songs 8:12)? Am I a “loose” woman? Do I communicate to the men around me that I am “available”? Does my demeanor invite them to “partake” of intimate parts of my body, soul, or spirit? Do I engage in flirtatious speech, looks, or behavior?
- Is there anything about my speech, actions, dress, or attitudes that could defraud the men around me?
- Am I discreet and restrained in the way I talk with men at work? Is my conversation ever loose, crude, or unbecoming for a woman of God? Am I expressing admiration for a man that should more appropriately come from his wife?
- Does my dress help men to keep their thoughts pure and Christ-centered? Is my dress feminine and modest?
- Have I erected (and am I maintaining) adequate “hedges” in my relationships with men? What are those hedges?
- Am I currently in a situation that is (or could become) compromising? Am I in a situation that could appear to others to be compromising?
- Would my husband, as well as other men and women who know me, say that I am a woman of moral virtue and purity?
- Have I purposed in my heart to be morally pure? Am I making myself accountable to my husband and to another godly woman for my walk with God and others?
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“Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies”
(Proverbs 31:10).
©1998 Life Action Ministries. Used by permission.
Hi Donna, my heart full of love went out to you as I read the anguish of your soul. That woman of great virtue is right there hidden beneath a pile of trash the devil has been piling upon you all of your life. He’s blinded your eye so that you cannot see her. You’ve been searching for her from outside of you but she’s not out there, she’s right there inside of YOU. The REAL Donna is that precious spirit that the Lord gave you when he formed you in your mother’s womb. Once you allow God to strip away all the trash, all the hurts and pains, all the insecurity, rejection, abondonment and yes all the anger and fear, you will find DONNA, that woman of great virtue because this is your inheritance! This is what God has purposed for your life! Your enemy is not man but a crafty old devil that has been around when God made woman out of man’s rib. The devil was jealous and fearful of woman from the beginning because it was the Seed of woman (JESUS) that was to crush his ugly little head on the Cross at Calvary!
Seek God with ALL of your heart and with everything you’ve got and when you find him, you will find TRUE love because GOD IS LOVE! That’s right, when you come to know the Father’s heart for you (the answers are found in the Holy Bible) you will find the rest that you’re been seeking for in all the wrong places and with all the men that you’ve ever been with. God says in his Holy Bible “If you seek me with ALL of your heart, you will find me”. GOD LOVES DONNA, GOD LOVES DONNA, GOD LOVES DONNA!!!! That’s why He gave his one and only Son… because God SO LOVES DONNA!!! I am praying for you. Bless you sweet child of the Most High God. Anne
A woman of great virtue has been my goal for 15 years now. But my husband was not virtuous and now I am divorced. A single mother with four children (3 have left home), I have a desire to be a virtous wife, but am a frustrated single mom for a decade. I am dating the fourth man since my divorce, and am unhappy. he isnt the husband you are talking about in your questions…I cant find him and have about given up. I feel like God has set me apart, but I am unworthy as I have this 43 year old body that needs attention, love, sex, and intimacy. i am thinking that a my time to flower fades, I will be alone all the rest of my days. And thats probably better than the men i seem to attract anyway. Now that my job as total provider(my husband became a drug addict and is in the gutter) is coming to a close I am scared to death of being alone and having no purpose. Letting go of my sons has been the hardest thing I ever did. But I have done it and now what…? I have so much love in my heart, but it is riddled wit mistrust and jealousy and abandonment issues.Who will love Donna?