Comments on: Dating

By: Megan

Megan — Fri, 31 Dec 2010 04:07:49 +0000

So I’m only 15 but I’ve had a boyfriend for four months now. I’ve made some really bad choices in my life, which I know I’m young so how can that be?? Well after my friend was murdered in 7th grade I was so lost that I actually went on a chat site and talked about sex with an older man. The police came after my parents found out and I live with disgust everyday even though nothing happened, I was just grounded for three months. But the grounded didn’t do anything compared to the feeling of not being able to look at myself in the mirror some days. I know it’s gross, or it might seem dramatic but I feel like I can’t be loved. No matter how many times he says he cares and guys say they care about me, and even friends I don’t understand how they can see me as a human. But some of them don’t know about many things from my past, and I’m afrad that if I tell them then they won’t want to be near me any more. And what I’m even more afraid of is that they’ll say “It’s okay” and tell me how great I am now, when all I can think is “but it’s not okay!!!” and I push people away because Im disgusted with myself and don’t want them to have to be near a person like me. How do I break through?? How do I stop sobbing every night and getting head aches because I try to be on stuednt government and poms and dance and vollunteer and get good grades so that I can make up for my mistakes and have a reason for people to love me?? How do I love myself so that I can let others love me?? And in the end trust myself enough to love them?? I’ve broken alot of guys hearts. And one guy even got in a car accident after drinking because of me and I can’t stand the thought of hurting my boyfriend but it’s hard not to run away.

By: Rayven

Rayven — Mon, 31 Aug 2009 19:02:19 +0000

I dated a guy for about 5 months. We broke up a few times for a few reasons. I have trouble staying with one guy. I don’t cheat…But I break up with guys for other guys a lot. Colin and I hav broken up about 3 times and honestly I’ve never felt this way about a guy. He can’t tell and no one can tell because I’m always being terrible and breaking us up when things seem to get too serious. The summer passed and we saw each other at band camp…Everything came back. The memories, the kisses, the hugs, everything came back and completely took over and he even started talking to me again. He started texting and we talked about it…and he said he missed us. I gave him a few days to think about us and he replied and said that he doubted us. That he wanted us back but couldn’t let himself. We saw each other at the band party at the end of the week and we flirted, hugged and everyone kept asking if we were together again. It sucked so much when I had to say no. I came home and cried. Then our mutual friend told me he was interested in another girl and was interested in her…The same girl that helped me when I didn’t know if I should break up with him or not…The same girl he was texting all night at the party before He gave me a long hug goodbye and a secret kiss on the neck and left.
I told him we had to stop talking..He told me that everytime he thought he was over me, he saw me and he wasn’t. And that’s how I feel. Then yesterday he IMed me and said we couldn’t stop talking…And I told him that I had doubts and I was afraid of hurting him but I love him. I may not be IN love with him…But I love him a lot. I’ve never cared about a guy this much. I cried so hard when I found out about the other girl and when I realized he was actually gone for good. It sucks that it takes to lose something to realize how much it meant to you. He said he needed to think and that he just didn’t think he could let himself do it because he had too many doubts. Should I try to be friends with him like he wants, even though it hurts so much? Or should I keep trying to get him to come back to me so I can prove to him that I actually will be good this time?

By: Ame

Ame — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 17:13:08 +0000

Tiffany,
What you are experiencing is normal. It’s ok to not to want to mess up. Although you should get tested for a disease called Bipolar Disorder. It’s a chemical imbalance in the brain that makes your emotions out of wack.

YOu don’t sound like the girl that would veer of the road for to long.
Live and let learn sweetheart.

Best of Luck,
Ame

By: Ame

Ame — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 17:11:07 +0000

Jamie,
I’m so sorry. However, it’s not the end of the world. Try and make things right with your boyfriend. Let him know that you want to earn his trust back little by little.

Although maybe dating isn’t right for you at the present moment. Take some time and reflect on it.
The Best of Luck,
Ame

By: tiffany

tiffany — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 14:18:21 +0000

I first met my birth father around 6 years ago. I though it was cool and all but last November I found out that he killed his ex-girlfriend and severely hurt her grandson. He was high and drunk. My mom always says that I act like him. And thats what worries me…I’m scared that I’m going to end up just like him. She said he was a good guy and he cared about everyone he met. (I do too) I don’t ever see how I act like him but she dated him for a long time so she knows him better than I do. People say I’m smart and that I have a great future if I stay on the right road. I’m just scared that somehow I’m gonna veer off it and into a ditch or something. My mood changes suddenly and I snap for no reason so yea again I’m scared. Anyone have any advice for me?
Tiffany

By: Joy

Joy — Sat, 28 Jun 2008 15:49:03 +0000

Jamie,

I think you’re too young to be thinking about relationships right now.. I think you need to focus on schooling, and other things… You have your whole life ahead of you.. I wouldn’t blame him for not trusting you, cause you cheated on him… you broke that trust.. When someone breaks that trust, how can they expect that person to trust them again?

God created you to love him… Let God be your husband for now..

Romans 12:1-2 – I urge you brothers and sisters by the mercies of God, present your bodies as a living sacrifice, which is your spiritual act of worship. DO NOT be conformed to the patterns of this world, but BE transformed by the renewing of your minds, then you know what is acceptable, perfecting pleasing will of God.

I encourage you to enjoy being yourself… but I encourage you to seek the Lord… A guy isn’t the answer for you, they will never be able to fulfill your needs.. its only a relationship with Jesus that will.

You can’t get him to trust you… I see that you have insecurities.. You broke that trust. You can’t expect him to trust you just like that..

By: Jaime

Jaime — Sat, 28 Jun 2008 09:32:11 +0000

I’m a 16 year old female. I have a wonderful boyfriend who doesn’t trust me because I cheated on him. this is our second time going out he lives in a different state from me (8 hours to be exact) and i’m trying to get him to trust me. he leaves on the 9th of july which is 10 days before my 17th birthday he leaves for the army and im scared something will happen between us or that he will get hurt like killed or something. I’m scared and don’t know how to make it throw this help me be strong and not be depressed when hes gone and help me trust him. when he has done nothing to make me not trust him. i don’t trust him i’m not sure why tho help me please

By: Calli

Calli — Sun, 15 Jun 2008 20:50:17 +0000

Dear Karen,
My x-boyfriend cheated on me too. I’m still trying to forgive him. And it’s difficult, but it’s his fault he hurt you like that. My boyfriend cheated on me, and when we were going out, he treated me like trash, absoloutley no respect. It’s not that I didn’t mind him treating me like that or touching me too much. It’s just that I was so desperate for love and attention that I stayed in the relationship until he walked up to me and said it’s over. After that, I felt mixed emotions. Anger, depression, sadness, and I was shaking uncontrollably. My advice is to pray and ask God for the man that HE has planned for you. That’s what I do. But waiting and waiting is painfully annoying. I admire girls like these who do their best in their situations like these. It makes me feel better. Just be strong. Be strong Karen.

By: Ame

Ame — Sat, 14 Jun 2008 17:39:03 +0000

Pei Pei,
I’m not quite sure I understand your ummm infatuation with this girl. However, I don’t understand why people can’t accept the fact some people are attracted to the same sex. Although, I think Chris hit it right on, many people get confused between best friends and love. There’s nothing wrong with liking this girl. However, make sure you think it over before jumping in. It is accepted in some parts, but many parts of the USA are still very opposed to gays. I wish you all the luck in the world and I hope you decide what’s the best route to take. Just know that not everyone thinks like I do. In fact many people think the way Chris appears to. I’m here if you need me.

By: Chris

Chris — Sat, 14 Jun 2008 04:04:24 +0000

Hey Pei Pei, you are a girl? And she is a girl?
You do not really love her the way you think you do. The world has created this idea that it is 100% normal, and that you can easily love the same sex.
But really, she is your best friend., that is all. I believe many “gay” people get confused between a best friend and someone they “love”.