I can’t be happy no matter what I do

cannotbehappyI can’t be happy whatever I do. I try everything, but all the things that were making me happy aren’t making me happy anymore. I get angry too much and sometimes I don’t want to see anybody. Also, when I look at the mirror, I can’t like myself. I’ve been feeling like this for 3 months.

Advice: Usually at the onset of depression there is an identifiable event that either triggered the unhappiness, or caused it. Can you think of what that event was three months ago? If this onslaught was at a certain point in time and you can’t pinpoint it, then you need to make an appointment with your doctor. Something is causing the seratonin level in your brain to drop. Let us know what you come up with.


122 Responses to “I can’t be happy no matter what I do”

  • Tom Tom says:


    What seems to be the problem?

  • Tom Tom says:

    Watch me—
    I wonder why you would have as part of your tag that you would expect to get “Christian hate.” Has that been your experience in the past? If so, how?

    As to your post—
    Stating that because many smart people have proven many scientific things makes them right about the origin of the universe, is what’s called an argument from authority. This is not a valid argument because we know that there have been many smart people who have been wrong about something. Your statement also suggests that people who believe in God cannot be among the smartest men and women, so how would you reconcile that with the fact such learned and noted scientists as Lister, Pasteur, Newton, Kepler, Faraday, and Kelvin were all Christians? I must assume that your statement about all who believe in God denying scientific facts is referring only to supposed “facts” about evolution. Obviously, Christians do not deny all scientific facts in general.

    I believe it was C. S. Lewis who said that anyone who can look around at anything in the universe and not have proof of God, is like a fish telling another fish that there is no proof of water. However, the main problem is that people look at things with preconceptions. The evolutionist typically looks at things with evolutionary preconceptions, while the creationist looks at the same things with creationist preconceptions. Therefore, the same evidence can be used to “prove” two totally different conclusions.

    Keep in mind there are two major kinds of science. One is observational science which is used to “observe” the world around us to try to determine how it works. The second kind of science is historical science. A scientist observes things and creates a hypothesis as to how it came to be that way. If it can be seen in present time and duplicated, it becomes observational science. Otherwise, it will continue to be simply a theory. Because neither creation or evolution (the molecules-to-man type of evolution) can be observed happening today or duplicated, neither is scientific. Therefore, in order to try to prove either creation or evolution, we must look in another direction.

    Consider: In order to “do” science, certain things must be taken as givens. We must have rules of logic, we must have absolute morals, and we must have the ability to “know” and understand things. Science can’t be illogical, there must be morals attached or we could never believe what a scientist had found, and we must be able to know that what is discovered or found hasn’t, and isn’t, going to just change randomly over time. There must be consistency.

    With a foundation built on an all-knowing, perfectly moral, never changing God, science becomes possible. But if everything just haphazardly, randomly, and by chance evolved over billions of years, there is no reason it won’t continue to do so. Morality has no foundation, there are no rules of logic because they will simply keep evolving, and nothing can absolutely be “known” about anything. There is inconsistency which means that science can’t be done. Therefore, only the reality of a Creator God makes sense, scientifically or otherwise. Scientists agree that “something” can’t just come from “nothing.” Therefore, the obvious conclusion would be that there had to be something or someone outside of space, time, and matter that created it all.

    Space limits what more I might add in this post, but I’d be glad to discuss this with you one point at a time.

  • Watch me get a lot of Christian hate says:

    Everybody always believes in a God that has shown no prove to exist but then deny’s all scientific facts that have been proven by some of the smartest men and women in history

  • Tom Tom says:


    Since it was God who created us and our emotions, doesn’t it make sense to seek solutions to emotional problems from his standpoint?

  • me says:

    I was reading this till it got all religious on me.

  • Elkay says:

    Amy, we would love to help you but can’t without more personal info . . . so please hit the Talk to a Mentor button on this page, briefly describe your situation, and a trained Mentor will get back to you via confidential email . . . there is no cost to you as we simply want you to experience God’s love for His children.

  • amy says:

    im only 20 and don’t know what I want to do and I cant do anything my friends do I rather be home cry

  • believer says:

    Depression can have different causes for sure, but something that doesn’t seem to get mentioned is that fruits and vegetables are vitamin and mineral depleted now compared to how they used to be, because of the condition of the soil. Depression could be caused by something as simple as a vitamin D deficiency but many doctors don’t test a person’s vitamin and mineral levels, and instead prescribe an antidepressant. Unfortunately, when a person then fails to improve, it could potentially lead to more psychiatric medication.

    Also, doctors in our culture tend to have an elevated status to the point where people may idolize them or their opinions whereas the word of God says to put our trust in the Lord. Of course it’s often good and may be necessary to see a doctor, but to pray first – because doctors are human and therefore fallible.

  • I hope and pray that you will seriously consider confessing your sins

  • Aldo says:

    Deb, I sympathize for you because of what you are going through.

    As I was reading your blog, I thought “this woman needs to come into a relationship with God through His Son, the Lord Jesus Christ.” You see Deb, Jesus is the answer to all your problems, whether they be big or small, financial or habitual, domestic or physical. He wants to be your redeemer, your healer, and your deliverer. Turn your life over to Him, and trust Him to bring about what He knows is best for you.

    I hope and pray that you will seriously consider confessing your sins, asking forgiveness for and repenting of them, and making a profession of faith in the Lord Jesus Christ.

    If you would like to do that now, here is a suggested prayer you can say and truly mean. Remember, God is not so much concerned about the words as He is with your intent.

    “Dear God, I admit I am a sinner and need Your forgiveness; I believe that Jesus Christ, Your Son, died in my place, paying the penalty for my sins on Calvary‘s cross. I am willing right now to turn from my sin, and accept Him as my personal Savior and Lord. I commit myself to You, and ask You to send the Holy Spirit into my life, to fill, guide, and empower me, and to help me become the kind of person You want me to be. Thank You Father for loving me, forgiving my sins, and for giving me everlasting life, in Jesus name, Amen.”

  • Deb says:

    4 years ago i met the love of my life. I was so happy id been divorced for a couple years ama was enjoying time with my kids even starting from having nothing. Now i cry all the time i have extreme anxiety…in less than a year i lost at least50lbs and now hear negative about how sick i look now….My relationship is almost gone and it’s killing me….this week I’m entering inpatient treatment I’m so scared. It’s my decision i know i need the help and i just don’t understand what switched in my mind I the last few years to make me not want to live.of course i love my kids and girlfriend but its tearing apart fast. She’s been unfaithful right at the beginning but justifies it as i knew cause she was honest and said she had issues with fidelity i kind of feel maybe that’s where it started…i think i forgave her itd only been a few months i never been through anything like that and it continued to happen because our bedroom life she said wasn’t good….we spilt see was seeing someone she cheated on me with behind my back still and were trying to get things going….i got my own place again but I’ve been on so many meds and nothing works im so lost i can’t even communicate because of my past i was 8 months old put in. foster care until i was 11. 10/11 foster homes throughout its been hell and now 32 years later its all coming back i can’t really explain anything its all an excuse our whatever…

  • Elkay says:

    Broken, I am very sorry that you have had to go through so many different types of pain, grief and suffering. No one should have to endure an abusive childhood or be abandoned by their parent. And then have a failed marriage . . . so very sorry.

    I cannot tell you what God’s answer to your prayer for an end to pain and suffering ultimately is. But I do know that God is good and that He’s in control. Somehow or another, for those of us who are His followers, God uses harsh trials and circumstances to mature our faith and conform us to the image of His Son. On occasion, we see immediate positive results from trials. But other times, we must wait months or years (or until we reach heaven) to fully understand what God was doing in our difficult circumstances.

    The highest prayer we can pray is “Not my will but Yours be done” and you said that if living in pain is God’s will, then you will gladly do so in service to Him. That reminds me that Peter tells you to be “very glad for the fiery trials you are going through as these trials make you a partner with Christ in His suffering, so that you will have the wonderful joy of seeing His glory when it is revealed to all the world.” (1 Peter 4:12-3)

    And earlier in that same book, he promises you that “there is wonderful joy ahead, even though you must endure many trials for a little while. These trials will show that your faith is genuine. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world.” (1:6-7)

    Broken, I hope these two Scriptures help you see what God might be doing so until your pains vanish one way or another, maybe your prayers can be for acceptance, endurance and continued thankfulness for your salvation. Let me pray for you, “Heavenly Abba Father, Broken is living a life marked by fiery trials. His faith in You is strong and he desires to live out Your will for his life. So Lord, if it can be possible within Your will, we come to Your throne of grace and ask that Broken’s pain, grief and sufferings be taken away. Until that day, please give him a strong conviction of Your presence and love and great assurance of an eternal future with You in a restored world where there will be no more sorrow, crying or pain. This we ask in the name of Your Son, our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Amen.”

  • dream says:

    Broken. Why you should accept the pain? You are not alone. Everybody has some pain but God told us to rejoice! I can tell you that it’s possible. Seek baptism in Holy Spirit with speaking in tongues. Then Holy Spirit will be giving you joy without measure. I had many suffering in my life too and recently my father died, but I also feel that there is an evil spirit who attack us, spirit of too much sadness and depression. Reject him in Jesus name. You spirit and soul can rejoice in the Lord. When you are reading psalms there David is commanding his soul to rejoice in the Lord.

  • Broken says:

    Oh and thank you for taking the time to write me back. I really do appreciate it.

  • Broken says:


    Yes I am a member of a Bible believing church (Baptist). I think my problems with happiness goes further back than my wife. That was just one of the more recent and notable examples of my life of pain. I have read the passages that you gave me but didn’t really “feel” the message you are trying to pass on to me.

    I honestly believe that I was put here to feel pain. I’ve prayed multiple times for understanding of my life. When I pray for this and then read my bible it’s always a passage about someone suffering for their faith. (John the Baptist in prison, Job, Paul, etc…) I don’t know maybe this is how my life is supposed to go. At least my physical life. So instead of asking for my pain and suffering in this life to end I think I’ll just start praying for my eternal life to be good and accept the fact that I am to be in some kind of pain until I am called home.

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