Whether our sexuality was stolen from us or we gave it away, we experience a loss. But unfortunately many of us don’t allow ourselves to grieve those losses. Psychologists tell us that there are five stages of grieving; denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Writing out our life map begins to move us beyond denial to truth....

When we’ve been used or abused with sex, it damages our view of sex, ourselves, others and God. Part of the healing process will be seeing ourselves and sex from God’s perspective. God made sex. And He made it good, pure and pleasurable. But when sex has been a source of pain and wounding, it’s impossible for us to view it from God’s perspective;...

I’ve heard every possible story. In addition to hearing the stories of the women who come into our bible study for sexual healing, people email me from all over the world. Just when I think I couldn’t possibly hear anything worse, someone shares the unimaginable with me. The evil that people do to one another must break and grieve God’s heart,...

If sex is important in marriage, why does it slowly get put on the back burner? One excuse that I am sick of hearing is “I don’t have time.” I’m sure you are busy. I know I am busy. But think of all the things that you make time for. If you really wanted to have sex you would make the time. So what is stopping you? Take some time to...

We all know that building strong relationships takes ongoing work. We start by prioritizing our relationship(s) and finding time for those who are important to us.  If we neglect to do that life moves along and we can lose touch.   A close relationship is like a dance.  When one person moves, the other one responds.  The dance can go really...

Has love betrayed you? There is hope. “Why was it so hard to resist sex before marriage, but now in marriage, resisting is all I do?” “Why do I love my husband, but don’t want to make love?” “Why was sex so good before marriage when I shouldn’t have been having it, but now that I can, its lost its sizzle, and I’ve lost...

First comes love…or sex? “First comes love, then comes marriage, then here they come with a baby carriage.” You may recognize this little rhythm my generation used to sing to embarrass each other.  Based on today’s culture the rhythm could go: “First comes sex, then comes living together, and the baby carriage could happen anytime or...