We thought our intelligence, defense technology and security information guarded us. To our dismay, we were wrong. Now we know that even Americans are not immune to the assaults of hatred from other countries.

Hours after the start of this disconcerting violence against America, President Bush faced the nation and encouraged all of us to seek comfort from “a power greater than any of us.” He described his confidence in God, quoting from Psalm 23 in the Bible, “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil, for you are with me.”

To what degree can we rely on God to be with us? Is He really someone we can turn to at all…in times of crisis as well as times of calm?

God Who is There

God is the Creator of the universe who yearns for us to know Him. That is why we are all here. It is His desire that we rely on and experience His strength, love, justice, holiness and compassion. So He says to all who are willing, “Come to Me.”

Unlike us, God knows what will happen tomorrow, next week, next year, the next decade. He says, “I am God, and there is no one like me, declaring the end from the beginning.”[1] He knows what will happen in the world. More importantly, He knows what will occur in your life and can be there for you, if you’ve chosen to include Him in your life. He tells us that He can be “our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in times of trouble.”[2]

But we must make a sincere effort to seek Him. He says, “you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart.”[3]
That doesn’t mean that those who know God will escape difficult times. They won’t. When a terrorist attack causes suffering and death, those who know God will be involved in that suffering also. But there is a peace and a strength that God’s presence gives. One follower of Jesus Christ put it this way: “We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.”[4] Reality tells us that we will experience problems in life. However, if we go through them while knowing God, we can react to them with a different perspective and with a strength that is not our own. No problem has the capacity to be insurmountable to God. He is bigger than all the problems that can hit us, and we are not left alone to deal with them.

God’s Word tells us, “The Lord is good, a refuge in times of trouble. He cares for those who trust in him.”[5] And, “The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. He fulfills the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cry and saves them.”[6]

Jesus Christ told His followers these comforting words: “Are not two sparrows sold for a cent? And yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Therefore do not fear; you are of more value than many sparrows.”[7] If you truly turn to God, He will care for you as no one else does, and in a way that no one else can.
But What About Evil and Suffering?

God has created humanity with the ability to choose. This means that we are not forced into a relationship with Him. He allows us to reject Him and to commit other evil acts as well. He could force us to be loving. He could force us to be good. But then what kind of relationship would we have with Him? It would not be a relationship at all, but a forced, absolutely controlled obedience. Instead He gave us the human dignity of free will.

Naturally, we cry from the depths of our souls…”But God, how could You let something of this magnitude happen?”

How would we want God to act? Do we want Him to control the actions of people? In the case of dealing with a terrorist attack, what could possibly be an acceptable number of deaths for God to allow?! Would we feel better if God allowed only the murder of hundreds? Would we rather God allowed only the death of one person? Yet if God would prevent the murder of even one person, there is no longer freedom to choose. People choose to ignore God, to defy God, to go their own way and commit horrible acts against others.
The World We Live In

When Jesus Christ was asked by His disciples how to pray, He started with this: “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be Your name, Your kingdom come, Your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.”[8] Notice that last line: Your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Pray for God’s will to be done on the earth. Why? For the simple reason that God’s will isn’t always done on the earth. If it were, why would people need to pray for it?

On Earth we cannot rely on God’s will always being done. And that’s a terrifying reality. This planet is not a safe place. Someone might shoot us. Or we might be hit by a car. Or we might have to jump from a building attacked by terrorists. Or any number of things that might happen to us in this harsh environment called Earth, the place where God’s will is not always done.

And many of us, no — all of us, choose at times to stiff-arm God and His ways. Compared to one another, certainly compared to a terrorist, we might look like respectable, loving people. But in the raw honesty of our own hearts, if we were to face God, it would be with the awareness of actions in our lives that cause us to cringe at how we acted. We are aware of our proud, destructive thoughts and hurtful self-serving actions. We have rejected God and declared that we could run our lives just fine without Him. The Bible says that “We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to his own way.”[9]

The consequences? Our sin has separated us from God, and it affects more than this life. The penalty for our sin is death, or eternal separation from God. However, God has provided a way for us to be forgiven and know Him.

God Who Was Here

God came to earth to rescue us. “For God so loved the world, that he sent his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish, but have eternal life. For God sent the Son into the world, not to condemn the world, but that the world might be saved through him.”[10]

God knows the pain and suffering we encounter in this world. Jesus left the safety and security of His home, and entered the hard environment we live in. Jesus got tired, knew hunger and thirst, battled accusations from others and was ostracized by family and friends. But Jesus experienced far more than daily hardships. Jesus, the Son of God in human form, willingly took all of our sin on Himself and paid our penalty of death. “In this is love, that he laid down his life for us.”[11] He went through torture, dying a slow, humiliating death of suffocation on a cross, so that we could be forgiven.

Jesus told others ahead of time that He would be crucified. He said that three days after His death He would come back to life, proving that He is God. He didn’t say He would reincarnate someday. (Who would know if He actually did it?) He said three days after being buried He would show Himself physically alive to those who saw His crucifixion. On that third day, Jesus’ tomb was found empty and many people testified to seeing Him alive.

He now offers us eternal life. We don’t earn this. It is a gift from God offered to us, which we receive when we ask Him to enter our lives. “The gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus.”[12] If we repent of our sin and turn back to God, we can have the gift of eternal life through Jesus Christ. It’s pretty simple. “God has given us eternal life, and this life is in his Son. He who has the Son has life; he who does not have the Son of God does not have life.”[13] He wants to enter our lives.

The World To Come

What about heaven? The Bible says that God has “set eternity in the hearts of men.”[14] Maybe that means we know, in our hearts, what a better world would look like. The death of people we love convinces us that there’s something very wrong with this life and this world. Somewhere deep down in our souls, we know that there must be a much better place to live, free from heart-wrenching difficulties and pain.

To be sure, God does have a better place He offers us. It will be a completely different system in which His will is done all the time. In this world, God will wipe every tear from people’s eyes. There will be no more mourning, crying, death or pain.[15] And God, by His Spirit, will dwell in people in such a way that they will never sin again.[16]

The events of the terrorist attack on America are horrific enough. Refusing an eternal relationship with God, which Jesus offers you, would be worse. Not just in light of eternal life, but there is no relationship which compares to knowing God in this life. He is our purpose in life, our source of comfort, our wisdom in confusing times, our strength and hope. “Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.”[17] It has been said by some that God is just a crutch. But it is likely that He is the only reliable one.

Jesus said, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.”[18] For those who will rely on Jesus during their lives, He says it is like building your life on a Rock. Whatever crises attack you in this life, He can keep you strong.

Knowing God

You can receive Jesus into your life right now. “To all who received Him, to those who believed in His name, He gave the right to become children of God.”[19] It is through Jesus Christ that we can come back to God. Jesus said, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father, but through Me.”[20] Jesus offered, “Behold, I stand at the door and knock; if anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him.”[21]

Right now you can ask God to enter your life. You can do this through prayer. Prayer means talking honestly with God. At this moment you can call out to God by telling Him something like this in sincerity:

“God, I have turned away from You in my heart, but I want to change that. I want to know You. I want to receive Jesus Christ and His forgiveness into my life. I don’t want to be separated from You anymore. Be the God of my life from this day onward. Thank you God.”

Have you just now sincerely asked God into your life? If you have, you have a lot to look forward to. God promises to make your present life one of greater satisfaction through knowing Him.[22] He promises to make His home in you.[23] And He gives you eternal life.[24]

No matter what happens in the world around you, God can be there for you. Though people do not follow God’s ways, God is able to take horrible circumstances and bring about His plan anyway. God is ultimately in control over world events. If you are God’s, then you can rest on the promise that, “All things work together for good for those who love God and are called according to His purpose.”[25]

Jesus Christ said, “My peace I give to you; not as the world gives, do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world.”[26] He promises never to fail us or forsake us.[27]

To grow in your knowledge of God and His will for your life, read the sections Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John in the Bible.

Copyright 2001 EveryStudent.com. Used with permission.

Religion

It is the shortened life span of earthly redemption that leads most to their need for ultimate, or spiritual, redemption.

I just watched the movie Aeon Flux because, except for renting Kill Bill, the new film genre of fashion model as psychotic assassin had all but passed me by. Here is the Aeon Flux plot. People are cloned after they die, so they never really die: death is a commercial break between reruns. But the movie has a happy ending: a cure is found, the practice of perpetual cloning is brought to an end, and people can once again return to the “hope” of death, not having to contend with the wearisome aspects of continued existence.

I sometimes volunteer at the hospital near my house. I’m not sure what philosophy student wrote the screenplay for Aeon Flux, but I assure you that the prospect of nonexistence is not a comforting thought to those on their deathbed. It is only comforting in the abstract, and if there is one thing a deathbed is not, it is abstract. And it is for this reason that most people eventually seek out spiritual redemption.

But where does one go for spiritual redemption? Usually to one of the major religions, unless you’re really wealthy, like Cher or Madonna; then you can create your own.

What one finds in religion, though, is not redemption but the possibility or path to redemption. Certain activities are required, and if you choose an Eastern version, certain lifetimes are required. But that which we seek—acceptance before God—is elusive. Have we done enough? What is the criterion or cut-off point —1,234 good deeds? What if we’re one short? Will a pilgrimage be required? Have we earned it? Have we arrived? The result is that religion infuses us with guilt —there must be some commandment we’re in the process of breaking—and our guilt is assuaged only by judging others, for if someone is morally beneath us, we must be closer to the top, closer to redemption.

It’s like we are on one side of a canyon and God is on the other, and we are constantly building bridges to get to the other side, only to find that whatever bridge we have chosen—philosophy, religion, social justice—cannot possibly span the distance.

Grace

Then into the universe enters grace: true redemption and not simply the promise of it. In Jesus Christ, God does for us what we could never do for ourselves—dying for our sins and applying to us his perfect life—and that is as close to a definition for grace as we’re ever likely to find. Our part of redemption is making a decision to humble ourselves and accept God’s hand out of the mire, to place faith in Jesus Christ, to consent to be redeemed.

I’m not sure there is any one way to do that. If you’re Catholic or Episcopalian, I think it’s supposed to happen at Confirmation. But most people aren’t all that concerned with redemption at age thirteen.

As in a marriage, there’s any number of ways to say your vows. I eloped, so I wouldn’t really know. I simply said “I do” to a justice of the peace, and that was it. I believe that’s about all I said to God.

As a freshman in college, lying in my bed, reading one of those green Gideon Bibles people give you, I said “I do” to Christ. Actually, what I said was something like “Jesus, I want to know you. I want you to forgive my sins. I want you to change and direct my life. I want eternal life, and I believe you can do all of these things—that you will do all of these things.”

A simple prayer, followed by redemption. And as you’ve probably figured out already, it was that change in my life that has animated this book. As a recipient of grace, I feel somewhat constrained to explain it to others, to explain it to you. If redemption is what you really seek, then simply express that to God in your own words —or feel free to use mine.

In some entrepreneurial states you can still redeem your old aluminum cans. You take your empty Fresca six-packs to a redemption center, and they’ll give you money—nice, shiny money. This is as it should be. This is the theology of redemption. The moment you make that decision, the moment you say “I do,” Christ takes your sin and credits you with his righteousness. Not the hope of redemption. Redemption.

“I tell you the truth, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be condemned; he has crossed over from death to life” (John 5:24).

Back to the start of Redemption 1.2.

Rick James was formerly employed on Madison Avenue, as an art director at the advertising agency of Young and Rubicam. He has a BFA from Syracuse University and an MDiv. from Trinity seminary. Rick is now publisher of a small Press and lives in West Chester, Pennsylvania with his wife and three teenage children.
Used by the permission of the author.

In the movie Cinderella Man, Russell Crowe plays Jim Braddock, a boxer who through  injury, bad breaks, and the Great Depression finds himself in a life-and-death struggle to keep his family from submerging so far below the poverty line that they cease to exist as a family. They stoop so low, so eye level with the gutter, that Jim Braddock sells all he owns, surrenders his pride, and begs enough money to keep his electricity on and his family together.

Upon Braddock’s having reached the bottom (which is the neighborhood where redemption lives), his old boxing manager offers him a fight and a stepladder out of misery. Braddock enters the ring as a changed man. He is reborn with purpose and motivation, able to break free from the gravity of failure. He fights his way to the heavyweight championship and is vindicated before the entire country—Jim Braddock is resurrected.

Scratch that. I think a better scene is in Shawshank Redemption when Tim Robbins (playing Andy Dufresne) emerges from the sewage pipe, allowing the rain of freedom to wash over and cleanse him. And redemption, of course, is never more powerful than when Morgan Freeman narrates it.

We could, in fact, list hundreds of movies and songs with the same theme, for as I said, it is pervasive to the point of being a myth or a Jungian type. It is the story we always hear and never tire of hearing. Redemption is ? in the human equation.

Spiritual Redemption

While a prominent theme in and of itself, spiritual redemption does not tug at the heart the way its temporal sibling does, but that owes itself more to the illusion born out of movies than it does to reality.

Here’s what I mean by that. When any Jim Braddock story ends, the camera stops filming immediately after the temporal redemption has occurred: a gratifying moment of vindication before the credits roll. Which is nice, as far as it goes.

But in the real world, such redemption is always momentary —a snapshot—as life continues on after the climactic scene wraps. The love that brought temporal redemption grows cold, bitter, or maybe just stagnant until it’s just two octogenarians staring without conversation over black coffee at 11:00 a.m. in McDonalds. Or maybe there’s an affair a decade later. Or one of the partners dies early, leaving the other, twenty years of loneliness in a nursing home.

Relationships, bodies, success all grow gangrenous over time. All vehicles of temporal redemption are themselves subject to decay.

Like many writers, I am subject to bouts of depression. During one of my extended wakes (depressions), I turned to tobacco. Thank God for tobacco, or whatever they lace it with, because it brought relief, parole from my darkened cell. Tobacco is the workingman’s antidepressant. Some years later, though, a doctor’s exam showed a precancerous growth, which led to the realization that the tobacco equation doesn’t balance—the joy of smoking is never equivalent to the agony of quitting.

The point being this: the means of temporary deliverance contained within itself the terminal seeds of cancer. And so it is with all temporal means of redemption—a job, money, success, relationships. They tug us out of one tire rut, only to drag us into the other, for the camera of life is always rolling, always rolling.

Read more about Redemption 1.2.

Rick James was formerly employed on Madison Avenue, as an art director at the advertising agency of Young and Rubicam. He has a BFA from Syracuse University and an MDiv. from Trinity seminary. Rick is now publisher of a small Press and lives in West Chester, Pennsylvania with his wife and three teenage children.

Used by the permission of the author.

A stronger definition of peace is one that allows you to rise above your circumstances and remain calm despite the storm raging around you. It is a sense of assurance that no matter what happens, things will eventually get better, and that somewhere, someone trustworthy is in control. This sort of peace is not dependent on circumstances. Rather, it allows you to see beyond your surroundings and fix your eyes on a point in the distance that allows you to hold steady on your course and ride out the storm.

How can you find this sort of peace? By putting your trust in the one person who transcends all of our trials and struggles: Jesus Christ. In the Bible, Jesus offers to give us peace if we follow Him. “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28). As God, Jesus is the only one who can truly offer us this gift. If we put our trust in Him, He will give us the strength and the endurance we need to weather any situation.

Jesus doesn’t promise that life will be easy. In fact, if we truly follow Him, He says we will experience trials of many kinds. But rather than let these problems lead us to despair, we can be assured that we are not alone, and that we are not struggling in vain. As the writer of the book of James in the Bible says, “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance” (James 1:2-3).

You can place your trust in Jesus by asking Him to help you deal with your circumstances. Are you struggling with something right now? Take a moment and tell Jesus about it. Tell Him you trust in His ability to help you deal with the situation, and ask Him for the strength and wisdom you need to get through it. Then wait expectantly to see what God will do. Your circumstances may not change, but your level of peace and contentment will. Discover more about how Jesus can bring you peace in the “How to Know God Personally” section of this site.

Copyright Power to Change. Used with permission.

A couple of weeks ago I was right in the middle of downtown Vancouver

On a usual day, people downtown don’t try to touch you, but on this day there were open smiles and invitations.  People wanted to connect, to celebrate together.  So I walked down the street slapping hands with people I will never meet again. It struck me how easy it is to connect when we’re willing.  How often we hold ourselves back from that.

Holding back

The desire to hold back is very common.  I think we do it to protect ourselves, to keep from getting hurt.  Even in church it’s not always easy to say hi to the new person or to invite a family you don’t know over for lunch.  We’ve convinced ourselves that we shouldn’t want that connection.  But the idea of separateness is a very modern one.  Not so long ago living communally was vital for survival.

Just last month my brother was in India and had the pleasure of participating in a community lunch.  Dozens of people were up on the roof all preparing food together.  Men and women, young and old, they chopped vegetables and called out to their neighbors.  Dave was struck by the joy in they had in making dinner, a task we often see as a chore.

The church was always intended to work together as a body, a community. So much is possible when we work together, but so often our instinct is not to get involved.  We worry that we’re not skilled enough.  We worry that we’ll get locked into a commitment.  I wondered if it’s simply a part of our North American thinking, but I read article recently that challenged that.

In his article “Stand By” Shaun Smith asks “What if I decide to make a difference and it doesn’t make any difference at all?”  I think this is the real reason that so often, we back away.  What if I make the effort and am rejected? What if I spend resources and nothing changes? The problem is, this question screams at us so loudly we miss the other question lingering in its shadow “what if I become familiar with doing nothing at all.”

The other day someone reminded me “Don’t say their no for them”.  It’s easy to think that someone will say no before I even ask and talk myself out of taking the risk.  But God may be at work in ways I don’t know about and my little question could be just the opening they are looking for.

Take a minute to read Shaun’s article, you won’t be disappointed.  Do you find it easy to reach out to others? Have you ever caught yourself saying someone’s “no” for them?

Powerlessness. Futility.

These are two words that devour my soul. What could I have done differently?  It makes me feel as though I am a bystander. I’m not in the moment, I’m watching someone else’s moment. I try to get involved, try to encourage the weak, try to make a difference. But moments still slip past, people still stumble and I feel like a bystander.

The call to be a difference-maker

A struggle I have with the concept of change stems from my early Christian experience.  One morning a well-meaning pastor preached “You could cure cancer, and it still wouldn’t be enough.” He was highlighting the difference that Jesus makes. Jesus turns me from darkness into light – a 180 degree turn in my final destiny. In one sense, I suppose that’s true. That’s a big difference.  But what about change now?

Where is the call to be a difference maker? Does making a difference in Haiti have an impact? Does engaging my neighbor, thanking my bus driver, owning up to the hurt I cause when I live selfishly make a difference? Jesus calls me, and us, to great things. In John 14:12, he says, “anyone who has faith in me will do what I have been doing. He will do even greater things than these.”

Does this mean that I am not living up to my Christian faith when I’m not healing people, saving people, and bringing people back from the dead? Is this a call to greater miracles, loftier aspirations, and more incredible physical healings? Is change just about trying to one-up Jesus?

Washing windows at a bus stop

At my public transit station, there is a man who cleans the windows every morning. People listen to their iPods, stare at the floor, and gather outside when the bus comes to take them away. No one is there to admire the view. Is this the kind of change I’m called to? I do the best I can in my sphere of influence, but in the end, it feels as though

I’m washing windows at a bus stop.

I sit and watch the window washer. While he washes windows, he talks to people – anyone – about everything. While people sit and wait and watch for their bus, here is this man who washes windows who talks to strangers. He reminds me of the whispering voice of God, calling me to change my world. I hear the whisper over the cheer of the bystander.

Greater things than these

There are times when I do get involved. It makes me uncomfortable, or it’s awkward, or it’s a disruption in my busy schedule. I think of all the things that could possibly go wrong. What if I helped that person holding four grocery bags and walking on an icy street? What if I donated a little more of time helping kids learn to read?

What if I decide to make a difference and it doesn’t make any difference at all?

The allure of the bystander is that it keeps me safe. I don’t risk anything, and I am rewarded for it. With my peace. With my dignity. With my selfishness.

And so today, I stand by the casket of the boy who laid down in front of a train. I talk to his brother and ask how he’s doing. I offer my condolences, my support, my house if he needs a place to sleep or vent or just heal. I am compelled by the whisper of God to make a difference.

Change. Impact.

These are two words that create life in me. And a call to greater things.

Losing in an Olympic event would be feel disappointing, to say the least.

That was exactly what Netherlands speed skater Sven Kramer faced at the 2010 Winter Olympics. As Kramer skated in the 10,000m competition, his coach, Gerard Kemkers, mistakenly waved him toward the inside track instead of the outside track where the skater had been heading. The coach’s error led to Kramer being disqualified from the race, even though based on his time he placed first and would’ve won the gold medal.

People wondered whether Kramer would be able to forgive his coach. Kramer himself probably wondered if he would be able to forgive. And even if he could, would the rest of his country be able to forgive this public blunder of epic proportions? The chief sports editor for the Dutch newspaper The Telegraph commented that “This is a historic mistake. I think in Holland, over 50 years, we will still remember this mistake.” (Source: NPR)

We have all made mistakes in our own lives. While ours were not likely scrutinized by the world as Kemkers’ was, many of them seem just as meaningful to us, especially moral choices. From lapses in judgment to ignoring our own ethical standards in the misguided pursuit of some goal, the effects of a seemingly simple moral choice can end up haunting us for years.

The result is that many people are saddled with guilt. The proper way to deal with guilt is not denial; but how can we continue to have self-confidence in ourselves despite our mistakes and moral failures? If you feel like you’ve really messed up, you may appreciate Peter’s situation. He claimed he would follow his mentor even to death if necessary, but eventually Peter abandoned his mentor (and best friend). Read about how Peter’s guilt and anxiety were assuaged.

If you are struggling with issues of guilt and anxiety, and need someone to talk with, please contact us to talk today. You will be matched up (confidentially) with someone familiar with your struggles who will reply privately to you via email.

That was exactly what Netherlands speed skater Sven Kramer faced at the 2010 Winter Olympics. As Kramer skated in the 10,000m competition, his coach, Gerard Kemkers, mistakenly waved him toward the inside track instead of the outside track where the skater had been heading. The coach’s error led to Kramer being disqualified from the race, even though based on his time he placed first and would’ve won the gold medal.

People wondered whether Kramer would be able to forgive his coach. Kramer himself probably wondered if he would be able to forgive. And even if he could, would the rest of his country be able to forgive this public blunder of epic proportions? The chief sports editor for the Dutch newspaper The Telegraph commented that “This is a historic mistake. I think in Holland, over 50 years, we will still remember this mistake.” (Source: NPR)

We have all made mistakes in our own lives. While ours were not likely scrutinized by the world as Kemkers’ was, many of them seem just as meaningful to us, especially moral choices. From lapses in judgment to ignoring our own ethical standards in the misguided pursuit of some goal, the effects of a seemingly simple moral choice can end up haunting us for years.

The result is that many people are saddled with guilt. The proper way to deal with guilt is not denial; but how can we continue to have self-confidence in ourselves despite our mistakes and moral failures?

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:9

If you feel like you’ve really messed up, you may appreciate the apostle Peter’s situation. He claimed he would follow Jesus even to death, but eventually Peter abandoned Jesus when he denied him three times. If guilt is heavy on your heart today, read a short devotional about Peter and God’s forgiveness. The truth is that God forgave Peter, and entrusted him with great responsibility even after his very public failure.

If you have non-Christian friends who are struggling with guilt, you might want to point them to this article written for non-Christians which describes how Peter’s guilt and anxiety were assuaged.

Struggling with issues of guilt and anxiety, and need someone to talk with? Please contact us to talk today. You will be matched up (confidentially) with someone familiar with your struggles who will reply privately to you via email.

God has plans for my destiny, plans to utilize me in ways I don’t expect.   Author Erwin McManus speaks about this in his book Soul Cravings, saying “ We are designed with a need to move forward.  Without it our lives become only shadows of what they could have been”  (see Erwin speak more about our longing for Destiny) Wallowing in these bad habits is not an option.  Moving past them and expecting to be used by God is.

Moving past the negative

God has equipped me to move ahead and to rid of the old.  In fact, He not only equipped me to do so, He expects me to.  When I start my day, I need to give myself entirely over to God.  Giving up the old makes room for the new. The scripture speaks to us plainly on this topic:

Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires.  Do not offer the parts of your body to sin, as instruments of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God, as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer the parts of your body to him as instruments of righteousness.  For sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace.  (Romans 6:12-14, NIV)

We are not slaves to old negative habits.  We are able to create positive and  changes in our lives through the strength of the Lord helping us along our daily walk.

I believe that God gives us clear direction on this matter.  Through prayer and our willful actions we can go to Him to help us change our lives, to rid ourselves of the old and make way for the new.  That being said, I also believe that God gave us the intelligence to be able to constructively look at our habits and make changes in practical ways.

Feeling stuck

The realization that you are stuck in a negative pattern in an area of your life may not be an easy one.  You might not notice it on your own.   It may take a long time to accept it.  But when you do, there is a desire to right these wrongs.  We as humans all have a fundamental craving to be good people.  We want to make the effort to change the negative when we see it, to right the wrongs.

When I become aware that I have been acting in a poor manner and have fallen into bad habits I stop and take stock.  It is the most beneficial thing that you can do for yourself to move forward. There are some questions to ask so that you can assess where you are in the process:

• In what situations do you see yourself participating in the bad habit?
• Is it possibly a habitual thing you don’t think about or notice you are doing?
• Is it something that happens in social situations?
• Is it stress related?
• How often does it happen?
• Are there certain environmental factors that lead to it happening or trigger it?

Taking stock

Take some time to stop and reflect on when you most notice your negative habits appearing.  After every occurrence,  note what happened before you found yourself in that place.  What were you thinking and feeling before, during and especially after it happened?  Realizing and validating how you felt afterwards can be a great motivator.  Getting rid of the old habits will rest on being able to pin exactly what it is that brings about the negative actions time and time again.

Now you should be able to accurately note if there is a reason that you see yourself continually engaging in the behavior.  Is this a negative and harming personality trait?  Is there a positive feeing or thought associated with it somehow?  What function does this action really have? To deflect?  To make yourself feel confident and prevent unease in a hard or stressful situation?

Why you do what you do

Once you have come to realize exactly what the old habit is, and WHY you continue to do it, you can focus on bringing personal relief to the situation.  Do you need to work on self-confidence, being in groups, stress, handling criticism?  Do you lack guidance, are you struggling with your relationship with God?  There are many reasons that you may have begun to slip into this negative behavior.  I know that almost every time I have caught myself engaging in a negative behavior pattern, it has been a symptom of a far greater problem.  The diagnosis has been different for me nearly every time.  But the desire to face the problems head on and move past it has been a constant.

Refusing to be held in a pattern

After you have acknowledged the reasons and feeling behind the behavior, you need to move onto the next step.  Changing the habit.  What are alternative and healthier reactions that you can pursue the next time you feel yourself slipping? How can you change your ways of thinking and viewing the subject that will allow you to prosper instead on fall into a negative pattern?  Try to think of positive and healthy ways

When you notice yourself slipping into the old ways, simply stop.  Take a breather.  Count in your head, take a deep breath and reassess the situation.  Why are you reacting like this? What exactly is it that you are feeling that is propelling you into this action?  What are some ways that you can level out again and bring this negative old behavior into the new, positive pattern?

Do a 180.  I would again suggest that after, you even write down what initially triggered you, and how you began to react.  Assessment of these moments will help you to avoid them in the future, and to start of reacting in a positive manner.   The scriptures speak to this.  “And have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator” (Colossians 3:10 NIV)

Moving forward

Now you are moving in the right direction…forward.  Keep the momentum going.  Be patient with yourself, and set up a system to address when you are slipping behind.  Have a point person.  Having someone that you feel comfortable discussing these situations with will soon show to be greatly beneficial.

I am by no means saying that will be an easy thing to open up to someone, but it helps to be accountable to another person and have them be accountable to you.  As brothers and sister in Christ, we are not only accountable to the Lord — “So then each of us shall give account of himself to God.” (Romans 14:12) — but to one another as well. “Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted. Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” (Galatians 6:1-2).

On an simpler level, it is healthy and good for humans to share our thoughts and emotions, feelings and struggles with another who is not there to judge, but to offer understanding and support.  Just remember that if they do call you out on something, that they are doing it with good intentions, and that you have asked them to do that.

Patience is a virtue

Be patient.  Nothing is fixed in mere moments.  Be prepared to commit as much time and effort as necessary to make yourself healthy mentally and emotionally.  Getting rid of the old to allow room for the new in your life is not going to be an easy process.  You WILL slip into your old behaviors from time to time.  What does matter though, is the realization that you are doing this.  Once you are aware, fixing and aligning yourself in positive behavioral patterns will become easier and more successful as time goes on.

In the end, remember to talk to God about your troubles.  Be in conversation with Him.  Ask, and listen for your response.  Sharing with Him and trusting, being in His word and opening yourself up to learning will be the greatest thing you can do to help yourself serve Him.

Do you want to talk to someone about making changes in your life? Do you have questions about how to change your ways to God’s? Email us and you’ll be matched with mentors who are trained volunteers with real life experience who can answer questions, point you to other resources, or just listen.