Please open your Bible and read: 2 Timothy 3:14 -16

Scripture is filled with true stories about women who loved the Lord and became role models for future generations. With the approach of Mother’s Day, I want to share with you some of the meaningful lessons I learned from my mom.

Lesson 1: Loving God’s Word and Prayer. As a child, I came to understand what was important to my mother by watching what she said and did. Etched in my mind are memories of her love for the Bible and her diligent prayer for me.

Lesson 2: Trusting the Lord. Mother worked in a textile mill, and she made just enough to take care of us. Sometimes I would become a little frightened about whether our resources would be sufficient. She consistently responded by telling me to trust God – He would provide for our needs. She demonstrated a steady confidence in God.

Lesson 3: Obeying God. As a child, I knew that if I disobeyed my mother, discipline would follow. Obedience ranked very high in her book. By learning to follow her rules, I was being made ready to serve the Lord.

Lesson 4: Treating Others the Right Way. My mom lived by the principle that you behave towards others the way you want to be treated. Even if she was wronged, she responded to people in a godly way, and she urged me to do the same.

No matter the age of your children, you can influence them through your prayers and your life as you seek to follow Christ. What spiritual heritage will you be passing on?

Question: What spiritual heritage would you like to pass on?

Another Mother’s Day has come to a close.

But when the last homemade pencil holder or pot of flowers has been pushed off to the side, the holiday hopefully will also serve as a reminder for husbands to consider their relationships with their wives, as they consider everything their wives do for their family. While a one day celebration can be a wonderful thing, a year-long attitude of caring can be the foundation upon which a healthy relationship is laid.

In his article “Commitment and Faithfulness in Relationships“, Dr Bill Strom, Professor and Chair of the Communications Department at Trinity Western University, describes the difference between commitment and faithfulness: “Commitment is our intent to stay in relationship with our wives; faithfulness is the practice of doing so.” Dr Strom continues to explore these terms and how seeking to live them out can have great practical benefit for your marital relationship.

Do you find that Mother’s Day usually ends up helping your relationship, or hurting it? If you have a funny or poignant Mother’s Day story to share, please feel free to leave a comment! And don’t forget to take a look at Dr Strom’s article.

Do too many parents try to live through their kids and put too much pressure on them?

I wasn’t forced to play sports as a kid. My dad played hockey throughout his young life, up to and including high school. However, not wanting to force me and my brother to follow in his footsteps, he didn’t sign us up to play hockey, or any sport, when we were kids. Consequently, we didn’t end up playing organized sports at all!

Many parents don’t take this approach, however. At a young age, kids are pushed into playing sports or music or other activities. While there are some great benefits that can come from these activities like learning teamwork and gaining self-confidence, there are also dangers, none the least of which comes from the parents themselves.

The Gazette reports that “More than half of Canadian adults who attend children’s sporting events say they’ve witnessed verbal or physical abuse against officials and coaches by parents, according to a new survey.”

In the article Peter Crocker, chair of the Canadian Psychological Associations’ sports and exercise section and professor at  the University of British Columbia explains that “there’s a lot of pressure at these games because they want their kids to do well and there’s this dream of the college scholarship, or in Canada of (a hockey player) getting drafted and going through the system.”

Were you ever pressured by a parent in extracurricular activities? Have you witnessed an instance of angry parents at kids sporting events or unfairly trying to live out their dreams through their children? Share your experiences with us in the comments!

If you are struggling with issues relating to anger in your marriage or relationship, you may want to try our online interactive life lesson “Lovebusters: Angry Outbursts“. You can also contact an online mentor to talk about it confidentially via email.

Occasionally we want to highlight one of the more thoughtful, interesting, and applicable comments that we receive.

This devotional really hit home for me today. I am a first time mother, my baby boy is now 11 weeks old and how life has changed! I feel so unavailable for the Lord these days. Before I had my baby I had all the time in the world to serve and reach out to others and now it’s been hard for me to do much of any of that. I know being a mom is a ministry in itself but I can’t help but want to do more for others as well. It’s easy to think that you I don’t have much to offer now and have that lead to not doing anything. But I don’t want that to be the case; my availability may look different now but I am not going to stop having a willing and eager heart to do more for the Lord. As long as I am willing, He will guide me into opportunities to be used by Him. I need to keep my eyes and ears open for opportunities that probably look different than ones I have had before I was a mom. Now that I am a mom I probably have new things to offer and a new group of people I can reach!

Read the devo and the rest of the comments here. If you are a new mom, do you relate to the above? If you were a new mom, do you have any advice or encouragement for soon-to-be moms or new moms like Hailey?

Upcoming online chats: Join us for daily online chats! One of our features will be “Is it important to care for the earth?” on April 19 at 12:15 pm EDT Please join us to discuss how to care for the earth?

Do you feel isolated, hurt or afraid and have no one to talk to?

Moses was not satisfied with an angelic presence: He wanted the confidence of God’s personal presence leading the Israelites to the Promised Land. And God gave it to him.

God gives us His presence also.  When we come to him in prayer, He is not so busy running the universe that he has no time to listen to us. He’s not impatiently saying, “Make it quick. Can’t you see I have lots to do?” He listens like we’re the most important person to him.

It makes me think of a doctor I had during my first pregnancy. Even though the waiting room was full of patients, when I was with him, he acted as though he had all the time in the world–like I was the most important person to him. I always left his office with new courage.

Can we give the gift of our presence to someone today?

Look across the church foyer and pick out a person who’s standing by herself. Introduce yourself, maybe even invite her home for lunch. Remember the person in your block who’s new to Canada or a neighbor who rarely comes out of her home. Invite them to go for a walk with you, or to have coffee with you. Mothers don’t forget your children. Sometimes all they want is your comforting presence. Snuggle up with a blanket around you reading a book or watching a favorite movie.

Thank you Father, that the promise you gave to Moses is for us too: “My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.”

Questions: Who can you think of that would benefit from your presence today? What are some ways we can show others that we care? How does God show us that He has time for us at all times?

About the Author Helen Grace Lescheid

Joan Giesbrecht didn’t have to deal with raising her grandchild alone, but she nevertheless didn’t feel ready to be a grandparent when her daughter became pregnant at age 18. Read her story, “I Wasn’t Ready to be a Grandma!“, to hear how her initial anxiety and trepidation was overcome, and how she was able to find joy in her situation.

Are you a grandparent, and if so, did you feel “ready” when you heard the news? Do you feel “ready” now? If you’re having trouble coping with being a new grandparent, or are pregnant or a new mother yourself, please contact us, we’re here to listen!

For the Love of Mothers
Here are a few things that you have learned: You can stir the spaghetti sauce with one hand and hold a fussy baby in the other. Snuggling and reading books together is time well spent. They will blame you when things go wrong and when they go beautifully, they will forget to thank you. You will see that a child’s laughter warms more effectively than a blanket. Read the full article.

Take action: Our online interactive life lesson Glimpses of Grace from Ruth explores how this childless and widowed young woman overcame what appeared to be a dark future.

You said it: This week K shared on the Meet You at the Intersection of Experience and Honesty women’s devotional, saying “Wow…I am definitely experiencing this right now in my life and I do not like it very much but I know that God is also calling me to better things in my life. And I only can discover what all He has for me by being honest with myself and being pruned. Thank you for confirmation.” Join the conversation on TheLife.com Devotional for Men and TheLife.com Devotional for Women, each updated daily!

Blog: Can the role of mother be the most fulfilling?
We celebrate those who are moms on Mothers’ Day with a flower in church and maybe a sermon, but most days it can be a thankless job. Read more

Devotional: He Did It Just for You
Want to know the coolest thing about the One who gave up the crown of heaven for a crown of thorns? He did it for you. Read more

Coming up next week: One of the topics of our upcoming online chats is “Mothers and Daughters” Join us in the chat room May 13^th 2009 @ 12:15pm EST for this chat or see also our full chat calendar for other upcoming topics.

A Mother’s Day Even a Mom Could Love
Now that Mother’s Day has passed for another year, I have to be honest: Until I became a mom seven years ago, I had no idea how stressful and even (let’s face it) awful it can be. I knew, of course, it was rough on the women who desperately wanted to be moms and on mothers who had lost children. I even got that it was hard for moms who spent the day far away from their children. So how can we help moms have a Mother’s Day they’ll actually love? Read more

Take action: Having trouble feeling content being a mom? A dad? Single? Explore being content in our Struggling With Contentment online interactive life lesson.

You said it: This week, bangkok malco commented on Swine Flu Fear, saying “With the UK confirming two cases of swine flu and the World Health Organization raising its alert level from three to four, the threat does sound quite serious.” Agree? Disagree? Have your say on this post!

Blog: The Road to Adoption
The word “adoption” stirs up strong emotions. For some the word represents the fulfillment of a life long dream. For others, it speaks of one of the hardest choices of all. Read more

Article: An Unreasonable Joy
When my first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage at thirteen weeks I was heartbroken. Read more

Coming up next week: One of the topics of our upcoming online chats is “Mothers and Daughters” Join us in the chat room May 13^th 2009 @ 12:15pm EST for this chat or see also our full chat calendar for other upcoming topics.

5 tips for a happy day.

I have to be honest: Until I became a mom seven years ago, I had no idea how stressful and even (let’s face it) awful Mother’s Day could be. I knew, of course, it was rough on the women who desperately wanted to be moms and on mothers who had lost children. I even got that it was hard for moms who spent the day far away from their children, longing for their company.

But that it was hard on moms with kids at home? Coulda fooled me. And apparently they did because my first Mother’s Day was – umm – less than blissful.

Mind you, this was totally my fault – totally the fault of all my silly expectations and assumptions I’d brought with me to the day. Expectations my husband could never have met and assumptions I had no business making (or at least, not expressing!).

So when the day rolled around and my husband presented me with a darling pair of espadrilles I had admired in a catalog the previous month (I mean, really, how great is this?!?!) BUT didn’t make mention of any brunch plans, I freaked. What’s Mother’s Day without BRUNCH? What sort of ungrateful husband doesn’t even make BRUNCH reservations? What am I supposed to COOK today? Isn’t this day supposed to HONOR ME?

I’d like you to think I only thought these things, but no, they actually came out of my mouth – straight into the face of my husband. Nice, I know.

The next year was better. No shoes or any gift. But he did make reservations at my favorite Swedish restaurant in the city. We were set to leave right after church and drive straight down. I still freaked – but I managed to keep it to a minimum. But we get out at noon. We need to feed Henrik. He can’t wait that long …

When my husband took out a pre-packed package of graham crackers and a sippy cup to tide our baby over, I relaxed, but realized there was something else going on with this Mother’s Day thing. So I began to ask friends what they really thought of Mother’s Day. While everyone said they appreciated the idea of it (and all of us adore the gifts our kids make for us!), most friends had had their own frustrations with the day. And mostly, these frustrations had to do with feeling like in reality Mother’s Day was being celebrated for some other type of mother. For the mother you see on TV, for the mother Hallmark tries to tell you that we all are, for the mother that doesn’t always like what we like or spend the day we’d want it spent.

After these conversations with friends, I had a good, honest chat with my husband. First, I apologized for acting like such a Mother’s Day psycho and not appreciating his effort. Then, we started talking about my expectations for Mother’s Day and what would make the day truly special and feel like it honored me as a mom – as opposed to some glorified, however generic, version of motherhood. He wanted to know.

Since that conversation, I’ve continued to think about some things that to help make Mother’s Day less stressful and more joyful. In fact, in the years since this happened, five of these ideas have weaseled their way from my brain and into practice – helping make Mother’s Day wonderful for everyone involved.

1. Let others in on the big Mother’s Day secret. You know that unless your kids are grown and you miss them like crazy, busy moms really want some time alone on Mother’s Day. Let’s just get this out: We all have seasons when a perfect Mother’s Day means a day where a mother didn’t have to mother, right? So if you want time off or by yourself that day, let your family know this. Don’t be rude about it. Make sure your kids and partner know you love them and will miss them. But go ahead and admit this would make your day great.
2. Say what you want. Obviously this is in line with the first tip. But let’s say you want a huge hoopla, big enchilada kind of Mother’s Day: tell your family! Maybe a hand-picked bouquet makes you feel honored. Maybe it’s breakfast in bed. Maybe it’s a fancy brunch, tickets to a baseball game, or a picnic at the park. Whatever it is, let your family know. They love you – so give them the best way to show you.
3. Lower your expectations. So, you’ve let the fam in on the secret or told them what you want. Now, forget you said anything. When you expect nothing and end up with something – total gravy! Seriously, if you want to enjoy the day (and not ruin it for the rest of your family) ratchet down your hopes and dreams for the day. Those grand illusions only lead to disappointment. Remember, that family you love so much? They’re only human. They love you too, but they can’t love you perfectly.
4. Extend grace. So maybe your lowered expectations will churn out the gravy you hoped it would. Then again, maybe it won’t. Maybe no one will put out much effort; maybe it’ll be a day just like all the rest. Maybe you won’t feel any more loved than you did the day before. Oh, well. As I heard someone tell me recently, “Notice that feeling and then let it go.” Because seriously, people, it’s a day. If you knew your kids loved you on Saturday – without them having made you anything special or served you a wonderful breakfast in bed – you should know they love you still on Sunday.
5. Honor another mom. It’s easy to get all wrapped up in our own mommy selves on Mother’s Day but let’s not forget about our own moms, mothers-in-law, mother figures, or any other moms who may be feeling the sting of loneliness on this day. Don’t know what to do or how to honor another special mom in your life? Ask her what she wants.

Related reading: Ever wonder where all the joy went that used to be in your life? Explore Discovering the Joy in Your Life.