Those who’ve seen Jean Louis Gerome Ferris’ painting commemorating the first Thanksgiving are likely to be misled by the artist’s rendering.

The Pilgrims landed in Massachusetts on Dec. 26, 1620.  Lacking sufficient provisions and shelter for winter, most settlers became ill within weeks.  Ten of the 17 husbands and fathers died with the “first infection,” and of the 17 wives, only three were alive after three months.  By April, more than half of the population had died of disease or famine.  These bleak circumstances were punctuated by other forms of human tragedy.  For example, William Bradford’s wife drowned as they disembarked from the Mayflower, leaving him a widower with a 1-year-old son.

Summer of 1621 brought a welcome reprieve from the harsh environment.  The Wampanoag Indians taught the Pilgrims to plant corn because the wheat they’d brought from England wouldn’t grow in the rocky ground.  The colonists also learned how to hunt and fish in their new surroundings.  Yet that fall, when they gathered for their first Thanksgiving, they were aware that the trials they’d encountered were not over.  In fact, a month later the settlers were restricted to half-rations.  And it was several more years before this small band enjoyed lasting freedom from hunger.

As the Pilgrims grappled with hardship, how were they able to maintain the spirit of gratitude toward God that resulted in the three-day celebration we honor by our Thanksgiving holiday? What can we learn from these forefathers that will help us remain thankful in a modern-day world when discouragement, calamity and heartache invade our lives?

Trust in God’s provision

The Pilgrims cultivated a habit of gratefulness long before they sailed to America’s shores. Traditionally, they set aside days of communal thanksgiving throughout the year to acknowledge God’s mercies and praise Him for His faithfulness.  This religious practice had deeply ingrained an attitude of thankfulness that could not be shaken by life’s events.  Whether expressing gratitude for everyday survival or a situation deemed the special providence of God, their trust in the Lord’s goodness and divine plan allowed them to find solace and strength to face adversity.  They understood that their endeavors were of eternal consequence and drew purpose from the belief that their accomplishments were, according to the Mayflower Compact, “for the glory of God, and advancement of the Christian faith.”

What a contrast this outlook is with that of today’s culture.  In a recent Barna poll, 92 percent of people responded that they are “self-sufficient.”  Another survey revealed that many Americans feel the main purpose in life is personal fulfillment.  Given these perspectives, it’s not surprising that individuals often feel overwhelmed by emptiness and despair when difficulties arise. Counteracting the resulting sense of hopelessness and lack of control may seem a daunting task.

However, we have the same choice that our predecessors had: We can depend entirely on ourselves, or we can turn to the Almighty for help. Knowing that a right spiritual perspective is critical when dealing with painful setbacks, Gov. John Winthrop concluded a message to his fellow settlers with Deuteronomy 30:20. Winthrop said, “For He (the Lord) is our life and our prosperity.” A thankful heart sees each day through the lens of God’s providential care.

Fellowship of support

In addition to being bound together by faith, those who came to this new land were linked by a physical interdependence that is uncommon today.  With few resources, the colonists bore one another’s burdens in a manner that we can only imagine.  In view of this necessity, an essay titled A Christian Model of Charity called on the colonists to “knit together in this work as one man…make one another’s condition our own, rejoice together, mourn together, labor and suffer together.”  In this way, the writer said, they would “keep the unity of the Spirit.”

This bond of brotherhood was reflected by the more than 50 Pilgrims who attended the first Thanksgiving feast.  The group spanned generations, from toddler Oceanus Hopkins to 53-year-old William Brewster, and hired servants to seamen.

Approximately 90 Wampanoag Indians joined the festivities as well.  Although they differed greatly from the Pilgrims in culture and religious beliefs, they too valued fellowship and hospitality.  Their willingness to share their food and expertise with the new arrivals had helped ensure the Pilgrims’ survival.  Now the Wampanoags participated in the time of rejoicing as the settlers harvested their first crops.

There’s an old saying: “Shared joy is double joy, and shared sorrow half the sorrow.”  Thanksgiving through the centuries has provided unique opportunities to express love and appreciation for others, as well as to come alongside those in need. Even on those occasions when we are hurting, we can find consolation in doing something for others.  Thankfulness is multiplied as we reaffirm our sense of community and bridge our differences through Christ’s love.

The Pilgrim’s gratitude flourished against the ravages of circumstances because they held fast to their belief in a sovereign, loving Creator and found comfort and support in one another.  Whether then or now, in an uncertain world, the relationships we have with God and those around us are enduring reasons to give thanks.

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Being thankful changes who we are
Sharing a verse at Thanksgiving: One family’s tradition

“It’s my party and I can cry if I want to.” This was my attitude when my husband, a Marine pilot, was deployed over the holidays.

The first few holidays David was deployed, I went back to Canada where my parents live so I wouldn’t have to be by myself. But that became costly and it was too much work dragging four kids on the airplane.

I remember the day I determined to finally spend Christmas at home without running away. I imagined waking up Christmas morning, with my four children tugging on my pajamas, excited to see what was under the tree. Then I felt anxious, knowing I would miss out on what I knew so many other couples were doing… drinking eggnog together, making pancakes, dancing to Christmas music.

And what about David? I knew he was having just as difficult a time. It was just different. What was he eating in Iraq during Thanksgiving? At least I was invited to a friend’s house, no matter how awkward it felt sitting at a formal dining room table with her and her husband. David was probably eating hot dogs and chips, perhaps the candy I sent him. And then he would take a baby wipe and wash his hands afterwards, seeing as there was lack of sinks and water. Of course, he would be imagining what I was doing with our kids, wanting to be home to fry a turkey and make a bon-fire, and just hang out.

As Christmas approached, he was probably looking in his mailbox wondering when a gift would come for him. What about a card? Was anybody back home thinking about him?

A new celebration

After languishing through the holidays during David’s first few deployments, it hit me: Why load the holidays with such expectations? Why not see every day as a holiday, a day of celebration?

I began to sit down with my children and make banners and gifts for their father on a daily basis. I would buy the kids gifts on non-calendar holiday days just to show them I celebrated them all the time. Sometimes, it was the simple things they longed to do… reading a book, or playing Frisbee, making crafts, even sitting down on the couch and watching a movie.

We found creative ways to celebrate, even without Daddy around. Every day became Christmas, in a way. Every day became a day of Thanks, and every day became a day of Love in our home. David would even find ways to celebrate with us by sending handmade cards to each of the kids on a regular basis. One year, I received around seven different Valentine cards in a week. I laughed. He knew.

“Choose life!”

In many ways…we can choose life…living to the fullest, seeing every day as a day of opportunity to celebrate. I have realized it is in all our perspective and how we choose to look at things. I choose life… every day! What about you?

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His deployment changed everything
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Although God could instantly transform us, he has chosen to develop us slowly.

Why does it take so long to change and grow? There are several reasons:

We are slow learners. We often have to relearn a lesson forty or fifty times to really get it. The problems keep recurring, and we think, “Not again! I’ve already learned that!”—but God knows better. We need repeated exposure.

We have a lot to unlearn. Many people go to a counselor with a personal or relational problem that took years to develop and say, “I need you to fix me. I’ve got an hour.” Since most of our problems—and all of our bad habits—didn’t develop overnight, it’s unrealistic to expect them go away immediately.

Growth is often painful and scary, but if you want the next ten years to be the best of your life, the work you are doing now will be well worth it. There is no growth without change; there is no change without fear or loss; and there is no loss without pain. Even if our old ways are self-defeating, we are tempted to return to them because, like a worn out pair of shoes, they are comfortable and familiar.

You must let go of old ways in order to experience the new, but what God has planned for you is far more than anything you can imagine. Stay steady at it, remembering that “little by little” God is clearing the way for you to grow and change.

Questions: What are some of the reasons why change can often take so long? Why should we remain hopeful if it seems like it’s taking awhile for God to “develop us”?