This post originally appeared in Jonathan McKee’s blog on www.TheSource4Parents.com  

“If no one watches, they don’t have a game!” –Gale

It’s a little ironic that some parents are objecting to the violent premise of The Hunger Games. “It’s kids killing other kids!” In actuality, The Hunger Games compels the audience to value life, mourn death, and literally gasp at violence.

It’s sad that The Hunger Games is being compared to Twilight and other teenage fodder, because truly…there’s no comparison. The Hunger Games has proven to be so much more. The film, based on Suzanne Collins’ best selling book, was powerful and thought provoking, an amazing social commentary about our society’s growing callousness toward violence.

If you caught my blog a few days ago, I shared four important questions I encouraged parents to ask about films to help them teach their kids discernment:

1. Is this story glorifying violence or inappropriate sexual situations?
2. Is this story making “bad” look “good” or enticing?
3. Does this story irresponsibly display imitatable attitudes and behaviors that our kids will absorb and eventually emulate?
4. Does this story needlessly sell out to showing “eye candy” like nudity or gratuitous violence?

Now that I have seen The Hunger Games, I not only vehemently express my approval for the film, I can also attest that it didn’t include any of those four inappropriate or irresponsible elements.

The film was superior on so many levels, but I think one element that resonated with me the most was the glaring contrast between the impoverished districts struggling day to day for a meager existence, fighting for mere scraps of food, while the haughty Capital City lived pampered, overindulgent lives. The Capital City’s condescending attitude was disheartening, but their callous disregard for human life is what took the cake. A gladiatoresque reality show featuring kids killing kids was pure entertainment to these monsters.

At this point I almost expect someone to scroll down to my comment section and suggest, “Aren’t we similar monsters if we watch the movie?”

Before you do, allow me a moment to propose two responses to this accusation:

First, are we never to tell any tales of such monsters?
Is it improper to tell a story about good and evil? Should we steer our kids clear of any of these cold realities about human nature?

The Bible is full of horrific stories of rampant sin and its consequence: Cain and Able (kids killing kids), Sodom and Gomorrah, Lot and his daughters (Eeew!). Fairy tales have long told anecdotes about evil villains luring kids into ovens, deceiving young girls to eat poison apples, and even wolves disguised as Grandma enticing cute little granddaughters close enough to eat. C.S. Lewis told marvelous stories about kids traveling to an imaginary land where they fought bloody battles against an entire army and an evil witch. Several of these films have made it to the big screen.

Someone call Westboro Baptist. We should protest all of these stories!

Perhaps we should stop over-reacting, and instead, begin interacting with our kids about good vs. evil, even using some of these amazing pieces of literature as a discussion springboard.

Second, The Hunger Games film responsibly made good look good, and evil look evil.
Sadly, today’s media often makes bad look good. Not the case with The Hunger Games. This 2-hour-and-22 minute film will not only keep you on the edge of your seat, it paints a stark contrast between good and evil. It won’t take audiences long to recognize the many appearances of evil: hypocrisy, injustice, exploitation, complete disregard for human life…and plain ol’ murder.

Then there’s Katniss.

I’m not really giving away much of a spoiler when I tell you that Katniss, our heroine, begins the film by selflessly sacrificing herself, instead of a loved one, to take part in the heinous fight to the death known as the Hunger Games. Katniss demonstrates honor, mercy and self sacrifice throughout the film. Some might be bothered that she isn’t a pacifist—she does defend herself and others. But Katniss is a true hero, something we don’t always see or read about in stories today.

Social Commentary… without Selling Out
Let’s be real. The filmmakers had a tough job. How do you provide social commentary about a society entertained by “gladiators” … without becoming the very society you depict? I was impressed, if not amazed with director Gary Ross’ finished product. Ross artistically transformed the novel’s first person perspective so that audiences connected with Katniss, quickly empathizing with her, carrying her burdens…feeling her pain.

There’s a moment in the film where two lives are taken in one moment…and something happened in my theatre that I haven’t heard in years. The theatre literally gasped. Sadly, today’s movies are so chock-full of senseless violence, I’ve often heard laughter or cheers when someone is killed onscreen.

Not in The Hunger Games.

Ross created a mood that recognized the horror of killing. In The Hunger Games death is mourned. Noble heroes wept in this film. Many in the audience cried as well. I cried twice…but I cry easy.

In a way it reminds me of what Clint Eastwood did with his powerful film, Unforgiven. How often do films portray the mental anguish that one experiences after killing someone? In Unforgiven, we repeatedly see people experience the guilt and complete change of heart that occurs when they take someone else’s life. This is contrasted to a few characters who are numb to the effects of pulling the trigger.

Hunger Games paints a similar distinction. Killing isn’t to be taken lightly. Ethical lines are drawn in the sand.

Too intense for most kids under 13

And for the icing on the cake, Ross magically refrains from showing gratuitous violence. Don’t get me wrong. This film is probably too intense for most kids under 13. At times we see glimpses of the horror taking place, but Ross shows incredible discernment, making sure that his film doesn’t become a spectacle like the games themselves.

In short, The Hunger Games was heart wrenching, powerful and thought-provoking. I’ll be seeing it with my girls (14 and 16) this week with no hesitation. Will it make it to my Blu Ray shelf? The odds are highly in favor.

Jonathan McKee, president of The Source for Youth Ministry, is the author of numerous books including the new Candid Confessions of an Imperfect Parent, and youth ministry books like Ministry By Teenagers, Connect: Real Relationships in a World of Isolation, and the award winning book Do They Run When They See You Coming? Jonathan speaks and trains at conferences, churches and events across North America, all while providing free resources for youth workers and parents on his websites, TheSource4YM.com and TheSource4Parents.com. You can follow Jonathan on his blog, getting a regular dose of youth culture and parenting help. Jonathan and his wife Lori, and their three teenagers Alec, Alyssa and Ashley live in California.

I do have trouble buying for my nieces and nephews.  I buy them books because I love books.  But they apparently don’t share my passion.  They value my gifts about as much as I would value an X-box game. One of my nephews announced this year – rather brazenly – that he’d rather just have cash.

Waldfogel’s news isn’t all bad. We actually do quite well on certain gifts. The closer we are to people, the better the gift giving becomes. Siblings value gifts at about 99% of their value, and spouses do even better, at about $1.02.

But even if we manage to buy good gifts, is that really the point of the season? According to most of the seasonal flyers that pass through our mail slots it certainly is. Shoppers’ Drug Mart, for instance, in their 36 page “Gifts Made Easy” flyer managed to talk about the “Top 10 Gifts They’ll Love” (though I’m sure my nieces and nephews wouldn’t like those either), and lots of things to “Rock your Holiday”, or things that “Twinkle Twinkle”.  Christmas is only mentioned 3 times.

If Christmas is only about gifts, then we are in trouble. It has become a big waste, whether we’re successful gift givers or not, because all we’re doing is breeding greed. I know it’s difficult when children are young and they desperately want the latest toy, but parenting is about identifying teaching opportunities, and I think this is one of them. Life is not about accumulating stuff. Life needs to be about giving, about making a difference, about family, and values, and faith, and love, or life becomes very empty indeed.

That’s why several years ago we started a new gift giving tradition with our children. We call it the “Gold, Frankincense and Myrrh” ritual, where they each get three gifts, and nothing more. The gold gift is something they WANT. The frankincense gift is something they NEED, like socks or pajamas.  And the myrrh gift is something to NURTURE their souls. It could be a journal, or a book, or a CD, or a movie. It’s something that reminds them of their purpose here on earth, or encourages them to think, to write, and to pray about what’s important. It’s always the biggest challenge to find such a thing, but it’s a challenge I’m up for, since it’s a reminder of the reason for the season. And I’m pretty sure, despite what the flyers might say, that reason should not be greed.

“We will tell the next generation the praiseworthy deeds of the LORD, his power, and the wonders he has done.” Psalms 78:1-4

Do you have the impression that the next generation is not interested in hearing about the things of the Lord? We sometimes feel the divide is so great that we simply stay in our familiar circles far removed from theirs. Sometimes our own judgments even keep us from seeing past the earrings and tattoos. Yet there is a deep growing hunger in our youth for spiritual understanding and they are seeking answers that we, who have walked with the Lord and have experienced His faithfulness, have to offer.

Would it surprise you if you drove past your church this week and found over 500 young people lined up to ask a Christian mentor questions about life and faith?

That is exactly what is happening here at TruthMedia. It’s amazing! God is at work! A ministry from the US – DMLive – has partnered with us to help teens. Our mentor center receives thousands of emails every month from teens wanting to talk with someone about the challenges of their lives. Watch DMLive’s Dawson McAllister talk about his experience with The Mentor Center and mentoring teens.

Would you consider being a mentor to teens? We offer training and resources to help you. If you receive an inquiry you don’t feel equipped to respond to you can return it to the pool and receive another so you only deal with ones you are comfortable with. You can sign up for just one a month, one a week or one a day, whatever works into your schedule.

Look around you today and watch for the teens in your circle of influence. Pray for them as you pass them on the street. Share your own story with a grandchild. Ask God for creative ways to tell the next generation of His faithfulness to you. And please investigate the possibility of becoming a teen mentor. These kids are sitting down at their computers and seeking answers that their hearts yearn for.

Your faith in Jesus and your stories of His faithfulness to you are just the things that will inspire this next generation to look to God as well. Won’t you consider being a teen mentor today?

Father God,
Thank you that Your Spirit never ceases to draw hearts to You. Help me today to see the teens in my circle with new eyes. Help me to see the hungry hearts behind the fashion statements and to pray for those I encounter each day. Open opportunities for me to share Your faithfulness in fresh ways. If You desire for me to be a teen mentor online please don’t let the thought leave me and help me to respond. Lord, I want to share Your praiseworthy deeds with the next generation in whatever way You open for me today. In the strong name of Jesus I pray, amen.

Please check out the Mentor Application today.

Questions: How do you view the next generation? Are you willing to let God use you today to reach out to a teen in your world or online?

“God what are you doing?” I wondered.  The house had seemed like such a miracle, and now we were so disappointed.  We said yes to the second house, but were still in grief over the first one.  During that time the movie preview was postponed to 1:30.  At 1:20 my daughter said to me, “Mom lets go to a movie.” I suddenly remembered Courageous and we ran out the door.

I was not expecting the range of emotions that Courageous took me on.  I laughed, (really laughed) I cried (get-out-the-tissues-and-pass-them-down-the-row cried). I enjoyed it and the values resonated deep in my spirit.  Values are very important to me and it was great to see a movie with such a strong message about priorities.

It brought me to tears

At one point during the film my eleven year old asked why I was crying.  (Any parent will understand why I was crying, but it was lost on her.)  I was crying because I love my kids SO much, and because we are SO rich because we have them.  I cried because I miss my son and daughter who live in heaven.  I cried for the reminder to appreciate my family and take seriously my responsibility and to laugh and dance and spend time with them. I cried because no matter where we live we are together and we have each other and THAT is what matters MOST.

I walked out of the theatre with a new perspective.  We already have the thing that is the most important. I was still disappointed to lose the house, but chose to focus with gratitude on the great things about our new home instead.  Perspective can make all the difference.  I have recently learned that if we want to control our emotions we need to control our thoughts.  It sounds simple but is hard to practice.

Courageous reminds us to focus on what is truly important: family, values, integrity.  These are the things that last beyond the moment.  I love my family and if we live in a shack and are safe and healthy, we still have much to be thankful for!

It takes courage to face both the daily things and the BIG things that life throws at us.  This movie features several men who face both the big and small decisions with priorities based on family values.  I was truly moved.

As a Christian who fully embraces the values of the film, I would love to see you all go opening weekend so that we can make a statement that good movies are wanted in our culture.  This movie’s message is SO important for our culture.  The next generation needs parents focused on character, love, integrity, involvement, and time spent together.

Get more tips on how you can be a better father:
Creative Parenting
When Parents Break Your Heart
Could you forgive your daughter?
Courageous: Helping Dads Excel

Courageous is a movie about five police men living with exciting careers and challenges at home.  One of them is moved to improve as a father.  His co-workers are inspired to do the same, and they resolve to be better dads.  But it doesn’t end there.  Life happens, and they have to make decisions – will they be the men of integrity as they promised when it’s hard, really hard?

This movie is exciting, funny, and action filled.  The police scenes will leave you at the edge of your seat.  You’ll roar with laughter and be moved to tears.  The movie portrays all sorts of fathers – fathers who favor one child over another, fathers of teenage daughters with boyfriends, divorced fathers and fathers who want to be better.

The press release for Courageous describes why a movie like this is so important:

Today, fatherlessness in Canada is widespread and its effects are far reaching. Studies show that fatherless children are at a dramatically greater risk of drug and alcohol abuse, mental illness, suicide, poor educational performance, teen pregnancy and criminality. Even in homes where the father is present, he may be struggling with career, life’s purpose or marital issues. Dads are often busy and disconnected. The movie Courageous invites men to make a profound change for the sake of their families, collectively altering the future of our nation as men put into practice what fatherhood should be.

This movie is a must-see for families. In a culture that is becoming more and more desensitized to violence, Courageous adds some sensitivity back.  Take your spouse, buddy, co-worker, brother-in-law, and vow to make a difference in the lives of children around you.  Dare to be courageous – it’s not too late.

Courageous opens in select theatres September 30^th.

Resources available

Resources have been created for small group studies and individual resolutions for men as well as women.  Churches are encouraged to hold small groups and continue the process of fathers building stronger families.  You can find these resources and more at http://courageouscanada.ca/resources

Are you a Dad wanting to make a difference in your child’s life? Get more tips:

Creative Parenting
When Parents Break Your Heart
Could you forgive your daughter?
Courageous

April 12th, 2009 forced a change in my life.

Change comes suddenly and without warning, often in ways we are not prepared for. A loss of a relationship, job loss, bad news, unwanted circumstances are all outside of our control. The change forces new challenges and opportunities to navigate the road ahead and forge on to allow God to lead us to new destinations.

If you are facing change in your life there are a few keys in making change your friend rather than foe:

1. Allow yourself time to heal emotionally, physically and spiritually from the shock of the unexpected. Making decisions to soon or for the wrong reasons can complicate your situation. The Holy Spirit can heal the brokenness and emptiness and bring wisdom in making decisions about your future.
2. Surround yourself with wise friends who will guide you and provide Godly wisdom. Be open and honest even transparent in the feelings you are experiencing.
3. Accept the fact change is a part of life and understand your setbacks can be followed by comebacks.
4. Know your steps are ordered by God and He has a plan and purpose for your future.
5. Understand that disappointments have meaning. If you separate the word dis from appointment it means cut off or separated from your appointment. Stalling in the land of disappointment will keep you from reaching the great and exciting destination God still has for your life.
6. Postpone major decisions but when you are ready aggressively take action to move ahead. Don’t allow  doubt or fear  to camp in your thinking.
7. Believe that nothing happens that God is not fully aware of and has provision to bring you into a new level of faith and wisdom.

Got change? Whatever change you are facing today God is still in control. The clouds will roll back and the sun will shine again. Change when accepted constructively will become deposits and investments that will become more valuable over time.

Take the Next Step
Coping with Change
Finding Peace in Troubled Times