Recently there was a young family sitting behind me on my flight from Detroit to Syracuse.

On this particular flight the 4-year-old screamed because she was bored for the entire four hours and the parents just ignored her. I have traveled with children before, and I know it isn’t easy, but there are things you can do to make it easier – for yourself, for your kids and for the rest of us. Meltdowns happen, so anytime you fly with kids you’re going to need a plan.  The following five strategies have worked really well for me over the years.

1. Bring special toys
Buy a few new sticker books. Buy a portable video game or a portable DVD player that you only use for special occasions (like a plane ride). Bring along some Polly Pockets or Pet Shops or whatever your daughter likes. You cannot expect a 4-year-old child to sit still and be quiet on a plane for 4 1/2 hours when she has absolutely nothing to do.  (You can’t really expect an adult to do that either.)

2. Read to the kids
When my kids were young I never went anywhere without at least 10 books. My kids loved reading books, and I would sit between them on the plane seats and just start from one and move to the next. Yes, this meant that the plane ride wasn’t as much fun for me. I didn’t get to watch the movie. But the children were happy and giggling and entertained, and a few times I actually had other kids come to the row and listen in.  Occasionally other grandmotherly types offer to read a book because they enjoyed the ones I was reading so much. It doesn’t take much to bring a few books along.  It’s even easier if you have a e-reader.

3. Sit between the kids
Don’t sit in the aisle, two seats away from a 4-year-old child who is near the window. Sit between them so you have control. It does make it harder to talk your husband who is across the aisle, but please have mercy on the rest of us who are in the plane, and make an effort to control the kids.  I promise we’ll appreciate it.

4. Be aware of your tone and use it appropriately.
Telling the kids to be quiet in exactly the same voice you use to say everything else doesn’t work.  Trust me on this.  As a parent you may think that you made an effort to control the kids and there was nothing else you can do. But if you try to discipline your child in exactly the same voice you use to day, “I’ll have a Diet Coke” to the stewardess your child will not realize that she needs to take your threats seriously.

If you want your child to listen to you specifically and to do what you say, you need to use a different tone of voice sometimes. Just because you say, “Jane, be quiet” does not mean that you are disciplining Jane. If you say it and she does not react, then it meant nothing to her.  When you say it, and she doesn’t listen, and you don’t do anything, it increases the chances that she will continue to ignore your efforts.

I know you can’t go all ninja on the kids on the plane. You can’t start yelling, and you can’t give them a time out. You can’t suddenly start acting differently than you do at home and expect the kids to behave. That’s why this all has to start before you get on the plane. Start disciplining them at home so they understand your tone of voice. Follow through on consequences so they’re used to listening to you. Things will go much more smoothly.

5. Talk to your kids
This may sound crazy, but interact with your children. As soon as you sit down on the plane, in a happy voice (to distinguish from your mad tone of voice), start a running commentary and conversation with them. “Oh, Jane and Sam, isn’t this fun? We’re going to go up in a plane. Let’s do the seatbelts up. Can you figure out how to do it? Oh, look I can hear the engines. Can you hear the engines? What else makes a loud noise like that? What do you think is going to happen next?”

“Wow, we’re starting now. We’re moving. Aren’t we going fast? Do you think we’ll go up in the air soon? Look out the window! Can you see any houses? What do you see down there?” And so on. And so on.

Talk to your kids. If you start a commentary like this, the kids will stay engaged, and they won’t cry. I talked to my kids non-stop. Yes, it was a lot of work for me, but it’s a lot less work than listening to a child screaming.

More often than not these days, flying is an ordeal.  Flying with children is that much harder.  So the next time you’re headed to the airport with the whole crew in tow, make sure you pack a few of these strategies in your carry on.  On behalf of everyone else on the flight, thank you.

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“You don’t need to be afraid of the dark any more, nor fear the dangers of the day … For the Lord says, ‘Because he loves me, I will rescue him; I will make him great because he trusts in my name.’ ” Psalm 91:5,14

“Ladies and gentlemen, we should be out of the storm in a few moments …” The calm voice over the intercom was hardly reassuring as our Pam Am 707 pierced the fury of a storm during our flight from New York to Washington, D.C. Lightning flashed as the aircraft bounced and shuddered in the turbulence.

I gripped Vonette’s hand. “I don’t know how much longer the plane can endure this storm without breaking into pieces.”

She nodded gravely.

The 707 began to twist — first to the right, then to the left. Its wings flapped like those of a giant bird struggling against a violent downdraft. Vonette and I began praying. Convinced that our aircraft could not survive the turbulence much longer, I tenderly said goodbye to Vonette and she to me. We told our wonderful Lord that we were ready to meet Him.

Then I remembered how the Lord Jesus had calmed the winds when His disciples feared that their boat would capsize during another violent storm. (Mark 4:35-41) If it was His will, He would protect us, too. I prayed aloud, “Lord, You control the laws of nature. You quieted the storm on the Sea of Galilee. Please quiet this storm.”

In a very short time, the rain and turbulence stopped. Amazed and thankful, Vonette and I praised God for protecting us.

Hours later, the pilot landed the plane at a freight terminal in Norvolk. The flight that should have taken sixty-five minutes had lasted four hours and taken us far from our destination. Lightning had knocked a huge hole in the fuselage near the cockpit, destroying all the radar equipment. The pilot said this was the most violent storm he had ever experienced. But God was more powerful than the storm!

God promises to protect and rescue those who trust Him. What peace and joy this gives us as we turn over the difficult circumstances in our lives to Him!

TODAY’S ACTION POINT: With God’s help, I will claim His promise to protect me and will not be afraid of danger.

Question: What are two things you can always do in stressful or frightening situations? (Pray & trust!)

About the Author: Bill Bright

How do you handle the stress you encounter at work and home?

The incident took place just after the Jet Blue flight landed when a passenger stood to remove a bag from the overhead bin while the plane was still taxiing, a law enforcement source with direct knowledge said. A flight attendant exchanged words with the passenger, and the conversation escalated.

Slater picked up the intercom and used expletives directed at the passengers, according to a source with knowledge of the investigation. It is not clear exactly what was said on the intercom. The source said that when the plane at stopped at the gate, Slater then grabbed some beer from the beverage cart before deploying the emergency slide and using it to leave the plane. (CNN)

Although most people don’t seem to condone Mr Slater’s actions, there definitely seems to be an undercurrent of sympathy for him. A commentary in the Toronto Star is typical: “I don’t condone the Jet Blue flight attendant for launching the emergency slide to escape the wrath of ugly passengers and creating a scene at the airport … But I fully understand how Steve Slater finally hit the wall and fled the airline industry for good.”

Slater himself told reporters that “it seems like something here has resonated with a few people and that’s kind of neat.” The recession has put employers into a place of power and employees are supposed to be grateful for any job, regardless of how stressful and terrible it may be. I’m sure many people have felt like doing something like this at one time or another!

How do you handle stress at your job, at school, and at home? Before you get to the point of blowing up (which may carry serious consequences if you’re not lucky enough to become a top news story) you might want to consider exploring ways to handle your stress better. You may not be able to change your circumstances (at least not immediately) but you can change your reaction to them.

Take a look at our article Battle Stress – and Win. And if you feel like you need someone to talk with privately, before you blow your top, please contact a mentor today to talk privately via email!

Money is tight, but you still want to take your family on an exciting vacation!

1. Family camp – Also called “intergenerational camps”, to distinguish them from the classic kids’ summer camps, they typically have beautiful settings, simple lodgings, meals included (probably in a dining hall), and many outdoors and other activities.Price can be as low as under $1000 for a week, for a family of four. (More info: About.com)

2. Be a  tourist in your own town – Many cities offer special discounts on attractions and parks for locals.  A quick Google search for “tourist in your own town” returns 4.5 million results! Take a look at what’s hiding in your own backyard, and explore the tourist destinations in your own area that you’ve never visited!.

3. Staycation – A “staycation” is a vacation that happens with all the benefits of fun and relaxation, but without traveling anywhere. It can either consist of doing a series of daytrips out of your own home, or staying in a local family-friendly hotel while enjoying local entertainment. (More info: About.com)

4. Branson, MO – If you have a little more flexibility when it comes to budget, a visit to Branson, Missouri (sometimes referred to as the “family friendly Las Vegas”) would be an entertaining destination with something for all members of the family, with activities for both the kids (such as the World’s Largest Toy Museum) and adults (such as Pointe Royale Golf Course). (More info: AssociatedContent)

5. Become an online bargain hunter – There are dozens of websites where you can find deals on travel, lodging, and entertainment. Don’t be content to accept the lowest price from a single site; a different site may find you much better prices. (More info: Canadian Living)

Do you have any favorite budget-conscious vacation destinations? Share your favorite spots with us!

Were the airplanes unfairly grounded?

It’s estimated that the decision resulted in about $1billion in losses. And now some are suggesting that it was a mistake to keep the planes out of the air.

Six days after ash from Iceland’s volcano paralyzed European airspace, aviation experts and academics are arguing over whether the entire mess could have been avoided.

[The] grounding of flights drew a sharp rebuke from Giovanni Bisignani, director general of the International Air Transport Association (IATA), who argued that the entire mess could have been avoided had the airlines focused on facts and figures on actual damage caused to jet engines by volcanic ash … Unsurprisingly, the European Union’s transit officials have replied that they’re not willing to compromise on passenger safety. (CBSNews)

One of the commenters on the article says that “The people whose lives were at stake, are better off to be inconvenienced, than killed.” This is true, but assumes that there was a real risk in flying the planes, which is the very point of debate!

However, the debate highlights a common mindset, that people are willing to risk their safety if it means that they will avoid inconvenience. Why do we sacrifice our safety just to avoid inconvenience? How often have you witnessed someone driving around a barrier, or circumventing a security measure, or ignoring a safety warning, because paying attention to it would make them late or cause them to go out of their way? Is it partially due to the pace of modern society that people feel such pressure towards efficiency at all costs and eventually burn out from the stress?

If you were inconvenienced by the flight groundings, please share your experiences! How did you get through it? And if not, have you noticed this tendency to value efficiency above safety, either at your job or in your personal life?

When you find yourself struggling with issues of stress and burnout, in work, marriage, or elsewhere, please consider contacting an online mentor about it. Your conversations will happen through email and will be kept strictly confidential.

Upcoming online chats: Join us for daily online chats! One of our features will be “Don’t Give Up” on April 29 at 10:30 pm EDT Please join us to get tips on how to never give up!

Pressure for a Perfect Christmas

The pressure to succeed can sometimes carry over from our work into our personal and family lives. Somehow we think the perfect Christmas is happening in someone else’s house, and we feel the need to compete.

Christmas is packed with expectations. Don’t be driven by a list of expectations. There’s a better way to have a satisfying Christmas. > Read more

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Also read: Learn from the market crash: Lessons from an Economic Crisis

This week’s success quote: “How you spend your time is more important than how you spend your money. Money mistakes can be corrected, but time is gone forever.” – David Norris

Christmas Feature: Connect with your Family, Even when You’re Far Away
Here are eight ways you can stay connected with your family this Christmas even if you can’t be physically present with them. > Read more

Save Time & Money: Four Ways to Skip the Mall
Who has time to go to the mall these days? Here’s how to skip the mall this Christmas! > Read more

Coming up next week: The Gifts of Christmas: True Friendship. Join us in the chat room
December 23, 2009 @ 9:00pm EST for this chat or see also our full chat calendar.

Photo credit: istolethetv, used under Creative Commons license.

Facing AIDS with Hope Statistics indicate that 50% of youth under the age of 15 in South Africa will die within the next 10 years. Every day 7,000 new HIV infections occur in people aged 10-24. I decided that I couldn’t just sit and do nothing. We decided to team up to educate ourselves on the AIDS pandemic in Africa. This research lead to taking a group of students on a short term trip to South Africa where I was approached by a local social action group to join in the work they were doing. Read more

Take action: Everyone harbors feelings of bitterness from time to time. What about you? Why not try our Escaping the Root of Bitterness online interactive life lesson?

You said it: This week, Michelle commented on Romancing Your Wife, saying “I agree… but what are the men thinking about this?… is it too forward to email this to my husband?” Read the article, add your own thoughts, and maybe forward it to your significant other: Read more

Blog: Gadgets on a Plane – Are you packing?
Gadgets are always a great idea but with the ever decreasing rules for carry-ons, you need to choose wisely. Read more

Video: Tips for Getting Through Airport Security
Are you tired of the long lineups to get through airport security? Watch this video for tips on how to get through airport security more quickly. Read more

Coming up next week: One of the topics of our upcoming online chats is “Cultivating Goodness” Join us in the chat room August 13th 2009 @ 9:30pm EST for this chat or see also our full chat calendar for other upcoming topics.