I want to believe in God but I don’t know how.

Sometimes the idea of God makes a lot of sense but all of the ramifications of believing in God are hard to swallow. If you find yourself wishing you could believe, you’re not alone. Consider praying a prayer like this:

God, I don’t know if you’re out there. I’m not sure how I feel about you if you are. But if you do exist I’d like to know more about you. Reveal yourself to me. Help me to find you.

It says very clearly in the Bible that those who seek God will find him. Ask God to reveal himself to you. Be honest about your reservations. God is not offended by questions or doubts.

If you have questions you’d like to talk about, we’d love to hear from you.  If you’d like to talk to someone privately, use this form to request an email mentor.  You’ll hear back from your mentor within a couple of days. (Questions about mentoring? Start here.)

You can find out more about how to become a Christian here.

 

707 Responses to “I want to believe in God but I don’t know how.”

  • Tom Tom says:

    Lucy—
    I’m so sorry for the loss you’ve suffered. Death is the great divider, isn’t it?

    There is probably nothing that will turn our attention to thoughts of God more quickly than the death of someone we love. Whether our thoughts are good, bad, or simply questioning, we instinctively turn to thoughts of God because we have a God-given conscience and spirit within us.

    The most basic answer to why people die is because ever since Adam sinned in the Garden of Eden, we are all under the curse of physical death. Some die young and tragically while others die simply of old age and infirmity; but death is the fate of everyone.

    One’s perception of God will make a great difference in how we are able to cope with death, or any tragedy for that matter. Because we have all sinned against a Holy God, he really doesn’t owe us anything but judgement and condemnation. And unfortunately, many people want to believe that since God is able to prevent an early death that he should do something to prevent every one of them. For whatever reason, that’s not his plan.

    God is just and holy and there is nothing he will do that isn’t perfect in every regard. He loves perfectly, he provides perfectly, he sustains us perfectly; but because he is infinite while we are not, many things he does are beyond our understanding or ability to grasp. He knows every detail of everything that has ever happened or will happen, and therefore he is able to make sure that everything happens exactly according to his perfect will. It is these things we must come to terms with in order to believe and trust in him. We must accept that he is Almighty God and that we are not. However, since he created us in order to have a love relationship with him, and since God in essence is love, we can have confidence that he will work all things according to his perfect will.

    I encourage you Lucy to seek God in this time of great need. Speak with him in prayer and turn to the scriptures for comfort in your pain and sorry. The Psalms include many petitions to God in the wake of tragedies.

    May I pray for you:
    “Father God, Lucy is in the valley of the shadow of death right now and desperately wants to be comforted as she seeks the answers to her questions. Father, since you know the agony of the loss of your own Son Jesus on the cross, please send your Comforter, the Holy Spirit to guide Lucy’s healing from her loss and guide her to a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. Please give Lucy great peace of mind and peace in her heart and help her to believe in you and trust in your perfection. Thank you for loving her now and always, Amen.”

  • Lucy says:

    I am struggling to believe in GOD. From recently finding out more information about my brother and sisters death, I have wondered if there is a God,why did this happen to my beautiful innocent siblings. I know people say I will never get an answer, but I want to believe in God. I want to believe that I will see them in heaven and I want to know that God is looking after them, but in order to believe in GOD I feel like I must completely be honest with believing that everything he does is right, but how can I with this situation clinging on to me every day. Please tell me how to start believing and trusting.

  • Sharon says:

    to Marion. I pray that you will find peace that passes all understanding and the ultimate peace is JESUS. I am praying for you and all who have a hard time accepting JESUS as God. sharon

  • PlsShowMeWhatImLookingFor says:

    Shaeli- I am very much so in the same position as you. Although I am 26 about to be 27. I too,suffer from a severe heroin addiction and have managed to lose everything. Whenever I think there’s no where else for me to go,but up,I manage to dig myself just a little bit a deeper. Repeatedly. I’d like to believe there’s someone,something,at the top of this hole of perpetual misery I’ve blindly dug for myself that is going to reach down and give me a hand in climbing up out of it,or at least fasten a rope to something solid and throw it down my way so I at least have the option to climb out,but so far all I’ve got is my shovel,so I just dig,and dig. Perhaps some day (hopefully,preferably sooner rather than later)I’ll think outside the box and I’ll find a new way to use this shovel&find my way up and out. Because that is where the light is. The light I so desperately need.
    Throughout life we have been given choices. Choices that you and I have obviously,&knowingly,made incorrectly. We knew right from wrong. And we made the choice that would make us feel better,we served ourselves above all. Everything we’ve done has been satiating to our flesh-self,which negatively impacted our spiritual-self. I believe in order to get to where we’d like to be we must first right the wrongs we’ve made in the flesh to even begin the healing of the spirit.
    My point is, I think I’ve been going about it all wrong. Like I’ve been waiting for or on something bigger that will be a miraculous life changer and fix everything, which is why I find myself getting deeper. Things just don’t work that way. We must first do the work, right the wrongs,and along the way we will find whatever it is we are looking for. Him. Do I make any sense at all? Probably not.
    I’ve always had a metaphor…that heroin is like a loan. We’re taking a loan out on the good feelings heroin instantly provides..but what comes along w/every loan? The time to pay it back plus some. That’s just how loans work. Plus there’s almost always a fine print. The withdraw we experience when getting sober, that’s the interest on the loan,and everything else,like the detriment caused spiritually, now that’s the fine print. Now we’ve just gotta pay up&move on.
    I know I didn’t provide an answer to your question,only because I do not have the answer,if I find it I promise I will let you know..but I just wanted you to know you are not alone. Sadly, you are one among too many. Up to date,I haven’t been much a pray-er(?),but I intend to change that. I will begin with a prayer for you. You have been a motivation to help me change for the better,so I thank you.
    I hope you find whatever it is you are looking for and that you are able to find peace. I send my love your way.
    -Marion

  • Elkay says:

    Esther, it is indeed God’s grace that saved you (and not the actions of a mortal man, who like all humans is sinful and thus cannot save you). Scripture tells us, “God saved you by His grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God.” (Eph 2:8, NLT) This is a wonderful event in your life, but there’s more. Scripture goes on to tell us “Work hard to show the results of your salvation, obeying God with deep reverence and fear. For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases Him.” (Phil 2:12-13, NLT).

    This call to cooperation is one that involves Bible study, prayer, fellowship with other Christians and the like in earnest. We are consoled by the knowledge that we are not left to do this work alone or by our own efforts. God is working within us to accomplish our growth in Christ-likeness. My prayer is that you will become part of a Bible-based body of like-minded believers and deeply experience the love and fellowship of God Himself.

    Shaeli, your have experienced some really tragic stuff in your life but have taken an important first step in a road of recovery by acknowledging that you need help. Thankfully, you do have your brother to turn to. Don’t let things in the Bible that you can’t understand or accept (just yet anyway) keep you from knowing the reality and love of God. Frankly, no human can comprehend the vastness of this universe and the amazing details of human and animal life; but once you begin to examine them closely, the more convinced you will be that there simply has to be a miraculous Creator and Sustainor. It simply can’t not be. Go to your brother and ask him to pray for you and then go with him to his place of worship. Another step would be to hit the “Talk to a Mentor” button on this page and someone will reply by email and walk alongside you on your road to recovery.

  • Shaeli says:

    Hello everyone ,
    A little about me, I am only 25 years old and already I feel I have lived far more in the wrong way than most people do in a lifetime . I am a recovering heroin addict and have struggled with the addiction for years. I grew up in a good home with a good family . I was spoiled for so long that I never learned how to be independent. I would get into relationship after relationship to feel love and motivation from my partners but they weren’t good for me or good to me ( most of them). Whether it be mental abuse or physical . I also have struggled with anxiety and depression since I was a teenager but now because of my addiction , going to treatment and my parents paying so much money for my mistakes throughout the years . I pawned everything I owned multiple times and even stole from family and friends. I’m close to losing my family and friends that are still around if I don’t get better . My brother and his wife are very religious and try to help me understand God/Jesus but I’ve always faught the idea because I can’t get myself to believe there is someone out there that powerful. I am not sure I believe in the bible because of magic and stuff doesn’t exist how could some of these things in the past happen that he did . Anyway, my boyfriend of 3 years died and my lifelong friend died from this addiction and it’s taking my life away from me, I’m starting to feel like I may not live on this earth much longer . I need help, I want to find a path in life , I want to try and believe in something greater than myself . I hope I can find my life and purpose again..

  • Esther says:

    Well pray, I was once believed in God and suddenly one day after praying I started reading my books and suddenly a thought came into my head,’what about if u are just praying to nothing’what about if there is nobody up there hearing u, I tried to let go of the thought but it kept eating me up.. I started looking for evidence of God.. I prayed fasted, but nothing happened I still had my unbelief.. But how could u pray to a God u don’t believe in? It eat me up for days and made me restless and cry, as I was searching for evidence, I saw biblical history on earth evidences{don’t mind my English}.. I search for miracles then I saw a man called Benny hinn, he did all manner of miracles, I believed in Jesus from that moment on ward, but letter something stroke me, what about if they where been paid to act that way… Until I watched a video of him when he healed a paralysed woman, I just believed more.. But still my faith was wavering just few days back, after paying to God, I heard a voice.. Ask for his grace.. I did, and he heard me and today I believed in Jesus Christ, he saved me, from hell.

  • Tom Tom says:

    Chuck–
    If I were to tell you I had a hard time believing in George Washington, what proof would you offer me that he existed and was the first president of the United States? Wouldn’t it be books and articles written about him by those who either knew him or knew of him? So why should that be any different with God? Why shouldn’t a person who wants to know about him and understand more of him go to the Bible? It has a total of at least 40 authors who wrote about him after having first-hand experience with him and his son Jesus Christ.

    What’s more, the Bible states, “Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.” His word is alive and powerful and can change the hearts of the most skeptical of unbelievers. How about you Chuck? Do you know God? Have you seen the new movie, The Case For Christ? It relates the true story of a man who was an atheist before he started to examine the Bible to see it was true.

  • Chuck says:

    Do some of you hear yourselves. People say they need help to believe in GOD and am your advice is read the bible because it’s gods own words. They just told you they can’t believe in GOD so the bible can be of no help. Until they believe. You need to offer up something other than. Because the bible said so. Because jesus said so. Because people back then SAW him. Those things can’t be the proof. When they are are the things they need help believing. C’mon..

  • Tom Tom says:

    Erik–
    While it may be true that a person can have some sort of “meaning” and/or “understanding” given them through such things as these oracles, the source of those “truths” is certainly not the Creator God.

    Once again we have man-made philosophy trying to add to the authority of God’s Word in the Bible. The Word specifically speaks against such “wisdom” and warns that it will lead a person away from the only true God.

    The “Oracles” are just another avenue of deception to lead one away from the real truth that comes through a relationship with Jesus Christ.

  • Erik says:

    For those people open to seeking God like I was you should seek out the book Oracles of Celestine Light. It has changed my life and understand that much of what many have been taught by their religions has not all been of God. If you give it a chance I know you will not turn back. I’m just a regular person who wants others to have the same opportunity that I has to know God unlike never before.

  • Elkay says:

    Kelly, whatever you do, don’t let Tom’s and my words be the end of your quest . . . the yearning you have to find God is He Himself calling out to you, God the great I AM who has been called the Hound of Heaven. Please find and attend a local Bible-teaching church and/or hit the Mentor button . . . if you want, ask them to put you in contact with me and I will be pleased to walk alongside you. Blessings today!

  • Tom Tom says:

    Kelly–
    Elkay is correct in saying you should start with the Bible. It is God’s written, revealed word to us about himself. I suggest you read the gospel of John; that’s the 4th book in the New Testament. John wrote it specifically so that a person could come to know the truth about Jesus Christ and to believe in him to be saved. Saved from what? Your sins. Lying, stealing, lusting, even not putting God first in your life are sins against Almighty God. So start by reading slowly and thoughtfully through John. Then write back with what you’ve learned. We’re here to help you as you seek God.

  • Kelly says:

    Elkay, your words are quite beautiful, and it gave me an insight of your beliefs, besides what my prior understandings of religion; reading the bible and going to church.
    I want to believe in God, I really do, but I want to do it for me, not my boyfriend. I don’t want it to feel fake or like I’m forcing myself into it to make him happy, because as Tom said – a relationship with a believer can have many pitfalls. Varying religious beliefs are at the center of many conflicts, both in casual, as well as intimate, relationships, and should be avoided if possible. If I were talking with your boyfriend, I’d point out to him that the Bible makes it clear that a believer should not be dating a non-believer due to those same pitfalls. (2 Corinthians 6:14 says, “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?”).
    I want to find God myself and have trust that he exists, and someday even become a practising Christian myself. I have faith, I just need to be guided in the right direction.

  • Elkay says:

    Kelly, Tom may very well answer your question for you, and while everyone is different, but here’s a thought. If you look at nature (the heavens above with all of its constellations, the seas beneath with all their marvelous creatures, the air around with all its flying creatures, the unbelievably and infinitely complex body we exist in , the vast number of “physical constants” that if they were different by even a very, very small amount, humans could not exist on earth), sooner or later you have to conclude that there is a “higher power” responsible for this universe.

    Then recognize that we have an “inner conscious” that inherently knows some things are “good” and other things are “bad” . . . and most of us, most of the time, want to be “good”. The ” thing” that is behind all this is the totally good God you want to believe in. The fact that God is good, gives us cause to worship Him forever. God created everything. He created you. He knows your name; He knew all about you before you were even born. He knows where you are, what you are doing, and even how many hairs are on your head.

    I want you to know Him and you can begin to from His Holy Word, the Bible where you learn that He sent His Chosen One, the Messiah, into this world to pay the cost for my sin and yours to make us clean and give us a new life as His adopted child. If you sincerely want to believe in God, we have freely available mentors who will come alongside you and walk the path to knowing Him. Just hit the “Talk to a Mentor” button near the top of this page and someone will contact you by email. Please do this soon!

  • Kelly says:

    Tom,
    Regarding your question – But let me ask you Kelly–What do you think it is that holds you back from having any spiritual beliefs? – I want to believe in God, I just don’t know where to begin..

  • Tom Tom says:

    Yrelella—

    Thanks for your comment here, but I’m not understanding what you mean. Would you explain why you believe science and religion are incompatible?

  • Nakia says:

    I’m really done with overly studying the word. Honestly I didn’t even go to church today because all I do is seek the word. I am going through a major transition in my life. Moved across the country with my daughter and really having financial, ex husband, and a lot of other things. Now don’t get me wrong I’ve been blessed with getting a car and job (which I prayed for), but I have no happiness, or laughter. I long and seek that out so much. I just want love again so that I can let my daughter see her dad and his new life. There is no way I can be this lonely person and my daughter meet her dads new life. I pray Jesus helps me. Depression has got the best of me. I need a break!

  • Yrelella says:

    I feel like science and my religion don’t mix well.

  • Tom Tom says:

    Kelly–

    I found your post interesting because it is the reverse of what is most often the case–that a Christian is concerned about dating a non-Christian.

    I think it’s important that you continue to be honest with yourself about your position on “religion,” and that you realize going into a relationship with a believer can have many pitfalls. Varying religious beliefs are at the center of many conflicts, both in casual, as well as intimate, relationships, and should be avoided if possible. If I were talking with your boyfriend, I’d point out to him that the Bible makes it clear that a believer should not be dating a non-believer due to those same pitfalls. (2 Corinthians 6:14 says, “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?”)

    I applaud you for not trying to fake some sort of religious belief just to appease your boyfriend. Sooner or later the truth would come out anyway. But let me ask you Kelly–What do you think it is that holds you back from having any spiritual beliefs?

  • Kelly says:

    Hey,
    My boyfriend is Pentecostal and I am non-religious. He wants me to ‘find God’ but I don’t know how to, nor am I fully for the idea.

  • Tom Tom says:

    April–

    Are there are particular reasons you do not believe in God? Do you have any sort of spiritual background or upbringing? Do you have a Bible?

  • Carole says:

    Renee – let go and let God. It is like releasing a balloon and watching it rise toward heaven. Once you have released it, don’t try to take it back. Just let it go – God will do the rest.

    Heavenly Father, we ask that you help Renee open her heart and mind to you and help her find the strength to let go of whatever is binding her. Help her reach out and shower her with blessings that can only have come from you. Bring her peace and joy and lead her into the light of your everlasting love. In Jesus’ name we pray, Amen.

    Renee, Immanuel means God with us. He is with you. Trust Him!

  • April says:

    I don’t believe in god… I want to but I don’t know how…

  • Renee' says:

    Thank you Tom.
    Please keep praying for me. I have difficult strongholds that I can’t get through on my own.
    Even if I don’t post here for a few days, please keep praying for me.
    Thanks everyone.

  • Tom Tom says:

    Renee–

    “Father God, I pray that you’ll do whatever is necessary to open Renee’s heart to receive the reality of salvation through Jesus Christ. I ask that you continuously remind Renee of the simplicity of salvation and that it only takes a small step of faith toward your marvelous light and that you’ll do the rest. Lord break down any barriers and spiritual obstacles that keep Renee from simple belief–belief in your word that says, ‘Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and you will be saved.’ May you give Renee peace and rest and victory over Satan’s attempts to confuse and deceive. Thank you in Jesus’ precious name, amen.”

  • Renee' says:

    Hi Tom,
    I think we chatted here before. Here’s my story again:
    I grew up in the Baptist church so I have lots of head knowledge of God and the Bible, but no faith. Maybe hearing about Jesus so much made me numb? I’m not an atheist and not looking for scientific proof. Been struggling for 21 yrs. At 17 I had a crisis of faith trying to believe and be saved, but never found peace. Please pray that God reveals to me whatever I’m doing that’s blocking salvation and helps me to stop. I’m trying to believe, but I can’t believe, repent, trust, & surrender on my own. I need God’s help every step of the way. I am defective in the mind/heart/spiritual areas. I honestly do not believe or think I have control over what I believe. This sounds strange, but I can’t control my mind much at all.
    You won’t agree, but I am 100% unable to believe, repent, trust/accept, & surrender to Jesus Christ of my own volition. I need Jesus to help me believe, repent, trust/accept, & surrender to Him. People say it’s a gift. You have to reach out and accept it. My arms are paralyzed. I need Jesus to lift up my arms so I can accept it.
    Please pray for me.
    Thank you.

  • Tom Tom says:

    Hi Renee–

    Sounds like you’re really have a hard time with spiritual things. Would you like to talk about anything in particular? What’s your spiritual background? Denomination? Have you ever trusted in the Lord Jesus Christ for salvation?

    If you’d prefer to speak privately with a mentor, just click on the Talk to a Mentor button on the top right of this page.

  • Renee says:

    Please continue to pray for me, if you were already. I’m still struggling to believe in Jesus, repent, trust / accept, and surrender to Him. I can’t do any of it of my own volition. I need His help for everything. I’m paralyzed in this area.

  • Tom Tom says:

    DJ—
    I’m sorry to hear that you’re struggling with your faith in God and in the Bible, and I’m wondering what brought you to doubt? Maybe you could share what happened.

    Asking that someone show you (in other words, prove to you) what God says about himself and heaven without referring to the Bible is like asking someone to prove what George Washington said and did without referring to a history book or his own journals. Since the Bible is God’s revealed Word to mankind, that’s the obvious place to go. Obviously, your struggle is in believing the Bible, so let’s start there.

    Here are a couple of web sites that discuss at some length (although not exhaustively by any means) the make-up and source of the scriptures. https://bible.org/article/we-can-trust-bible and http://www.alwaysbeready.com/bible-evidence

    Keep in mind that the Bible is NOT one book but is 66 books about the same subject. When you go to the library to do research, you don’t use just one book, but many books to substantiate the facts. You should be looking at the 66 books of the Bible in the same way. Does each book verify the facts of the others? Are there contradictions? If not, then the accuracy of each account can be taken with a great deal of trust.

    Please check out the two articles and then come back here with your comments. Looking forward to hearing from you further DJ.

  • DJ says:

    I have lost faith many times over my life. I have completely stopped going to church and accepting the “truth” that God is real. Lately, my lack of faith has brought troubles into my relationships. If someone could give me this one answer, I think I might be able to rejoin: what does God say about himself and what heaven is? If you can give me this answer without referencing the bible, while keeping credibility, I would regain my faith in an instant. The hurdle of not trusting the bible because it is man’s word and not God’s is my biggest problem. I desperately want faith but I have nowhere to turn for the answers I need

  • Tom Tom says:

    Vincent—

    I’m so sorry to hear of your spiritual struggle, and I know you are not alone. I’ve read several articles that discuss how difficult it is for someone who has discovered the truth, or you might say the deceit, of the JW’s or Mormonism to believe they can really trust anyone regarding God, Jesus, and the Bible again. I think it’s encouraging, though, that you are still seeking the truth. You should see that as an indication that God is working in your life and wants you to come to know him, both in truth and in spirit.

    Not coincidentally, today I heard Christian apologist Greg Koukl discussing the difference between having faith in something and trusting in something. The word “faith” connotes having to believe something without really having good evidence for it, while the word “trust” suggests a person goes beyond faith and actually will trust whatever or whoever is being considered. Consider it like an airplane trip. You may have faith that the plane will safely get you to your destination, but that’s different than trusting the plane and pilot by actually boarding the flight.

    When it comes to the Bible, the Creator God of the Bible, and Jesus Christ, each of these things/people have much evidence going for them as real entities in which one can place their full trust. In other words, biblical Christianity does not require blind faith in order to believe. Each item can be tested for validity.

    I and others on this blog would be happy to answer any questions you have and to offer you help in moving beyond the falsehoods and toward the real truths on which you can stand assured, confident, and in relationship with God and the Lord Jesus Christ. While the discussion could be most beneficial to many who may read this blog, if you would feel more comfortable speaking one-on-one to a mentor, just click on the mentor button at the top right of this page.

    “Father God, my heart goes out to Vincent and to all those who have been lead away from your absolute truths and into confusion, doubt, and despair. I pray that you will gently guide Vincent to a firm trust in yourself, Jesus Christ your Son, and the wonderful completeness and direction of your revealed word, the Bible. Thank you so much Father for being patient with Vincent all these years. I pray you will bring many others out of man-made religions and into the bright light of your beauty, love, mercy, and grace. May you open Vincent’s heart and mind to receive what you desire him to know, and may he become a powerful witness for you in the years to come. Thank you in the name of the Lord Jesus, amen.”

  • Elkay says:

    Vincent, Jesus was once speaking to a somewhat confused crowd, some saying He was good, others that He was deceptive and so He gave then a simple challenge that you might find helpful. He simply said, “My teaching is not really Mine but comes from the one who sent Me. If anyone wants to do God’s will, he will know whether My teaching is from God or whether I merely speak on My own authority.” (Jn 7:16-17) In other words, if you will determine to do God’s will, you will soon discover that what Jesus was teaching about God being Who He says He is, is truth and that Jesus is also truthful about who He is. Stay focussed on the book of John and see how this comes true.

  • Vincent Gomez says:

    I had been a Jehovah’s Witness for 44 years. A couple of years ago I discovered the real truth of the Watchtower. For two years I continued to study the Bible and look for answers. But after a while I became tired and frustrated. I attended a small Bible group study. The more I went and the more I did Bible research the more depressed I became. Everything that I did reminded me of why I was doing it. I was doing it because I just left the Watchtower. Recently I have allowed myself to let go of everything including the Bible and Christianity. I have decided that I need this time to heal. I need this time to discover who I am. But even though it has only been a short time since I made this decision I still have this feeling that I could be all wrong about God and the Bible. I basically have thrown the Bible away. But when I think of the Bible I remember the comfort that it gives. But the comfort it gives is where I have a problem right now. Is that comfort real or is that comfort like believing in a fantasy? I know that the cult has messed up my mind and I want to make a decision and do what’s best if there is a God. As I began to question the Bible, what really concerned me was the issue of faith. What is the bases of my faith? Hebrews gives us a long list of Bible characters who had strong faith in God. But they had so much evidence for God. They did not just have creation but they actually seen miracles of God. God did things for them personally. He proved himself. It was evidence and so they had reason to have solid Faith. But today it seems that our faith is based on other things not miracles but just the idea that God has a written book. I want to trust the Bible but it is very difficult right now just to surrender my soul to the Bible again and trust that it is God’s word. But deep down I believe that I could be missing out on something. Is it because I simply need comfort in a world that’s void and meaningless or is the comfort that the Bible provides real? I know I have repeated myself but I hope some of you might understand what I’m going through right now. Christianity is a very difficult decision in my life right now. I would have died and even of been tortured for the Watchtower. But now I wonder, could I really face an excruciating death at the hands of ISIS? That is a question that I’ve pondered. In order to do that, one must have absolute faith that what he believes is real and true and this is what is very difficult at this moment.

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