Control Takes a Toll

February 5, 2014

A couple celebrating 60 years of marriage was asked the secret of their success. “Simple,” the husband responded, “We decided early on in our relationship, I would make the big decisions. And the wife would make the small decisions. That was the last big decision we had to make!”

Humour aside, some people spend a lot of time agonizing over decisions. This stress could be tempered by learning to distinguish between trivial and important decisions. Prioritizing focus on the important allows one’s limited emotional energy to be invested where it is most needed.

If every decision is difficult perhaps a person is taking themselves and life too seriously. Or perhaps it is really a matter of seeking to over control situations. Control demands involvement in everything and every decision. Having to control everyone and everything is exhausting. First of all, it is an impossible expectation. Secondly, seeking control drains the life blood out of relationships! Relationships thrive in an environment of trust, respect and freedom.

Action:  Evaluate how decisions are made in your relationship. Are you satisfied with the decision making process? Are there areas where there is a desire for greater trust, respect and freedom?