Turning tragedy to treasure?

The domestic dispute in Wisconsin that ended in gunfire, killing 6 people and injuring a 2-year-old is absolutely devastating to hear about. It seems like all we hear about on the news lately is murder and violence. My initial instinct is to flip the channel to something more comical or skip to the cartoons rather than read the front page of the daily paper.

But there is a better way to deal with such tragedies. What if we changed our thinking from “how could this happen?” to “how can we learn from this?”

I know a strong man who survived a serious, life-threatening illness and his attitude towards hardship is not what you might expect. Some forced to go through similar circumstances might say “I hate this and I hate that I had to deal with this” but instead he chooses to say “I hate this but I’d better learn from this experience or else what was the point?” This strong man is my father, and his advice for how I should deal with my own difficult circumstances is the same. “Erin,” he says, “focus on what you’ll gain from this experience, not on what you’ll lose.”

This is not an easy task, but if we brainstorm together we just might be able to come up with some life lessons learned through tragedy. What can death, violence, illness, fear and other difficult circumstances teach us?

3 Responses to “Turning tragedy to treasure?”

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• Debra Rowe says:

  June 20, 2007 at 6:49 am

  I totally agree that God can turn tragedy to treasure if we ask Him to.We are missionaries in Brazil and in
  1994 our oldest child, at the time 9-yr-old David, was diagnosed with leukemia.
  As my husband and I were crying driving him to the hospital, David said “At least I know that if I die, I’ll go to heaven.” During his 2 1/2 years of treatment, he said “if anyone gets to know about Christ through this, it will be worth it”.
  The last month of his 2 year treatment he had a relapse, in the next 6 months he did 2 non-related donor bone-marrow transplants, and passed away on December 23, 1996.
  God has used the trauma of his treatment, the agony and despair of his loss. We opened up a hospitality home in memory of David and for the last 7 years have been housing mothers and their children who do bone-marrow transplants and live too far away to go home during the treatment. We also work in the chaplaincy of the same hospital where David did his treatment.
  There came a point in the midst of our pain where we asked God to use it for good. He has and still is.

• stan_10 says:

  June 25, 2007 at 9:37 am

  I heard a saying once that Jesus is able to turn our “scars” into “stars”. That is what I’m reminded of when I read your story, Debra. So often people think that if we pray for God to heal us and help us in times of tragedy, then that means we will have to forget what we have gone through and what we have lost. We still have those experiences and they will still change our lives, but instead of scarring us, with God’s help they will “star” us.

• gloria says:

  July 9, 2007 at 7:34 am

  This is my story on having a Daugther with Down Syndrome. The world may see it as a tragedy, a not so perfect baby born to you. poor you, I so sorry, and so on……

  Gloria Jr. is my 3Th and youngest daughter. Born May 5Th, 1982, 25 years ago. The birth was complicated by a c-section. I had no idea she was going to be a Down syndrome child, as at twenty six years old I was too young to ever have that happen…..So they say. I awoke from surgery to find Tony (her dad) crying above my hospital bed. I ask him what was wrong and his replied was “The doctor will be coming in to talk with you” and walked out the door. At first I thought he was upset that she was a girl, as we already had 2 daughter’s and he might have really wanted a son. We knew this would be our last child.

  When the doctor finally came to talk with me, he ask me “Do you know what Mongolism is?”. I answered “yes” and then asked him, “isn’t that called Down syndrome?”

  Well he gave me all the details and then finish up with other question for me. This one was before I even got to see her. “Do you want her?”, “if not we will put her in a place where she can be taken care of”. WHAT A QUESTION!!!!

  I would not have wanted anything else in my life at that moment. I knew that, right then and there, the second I saw her, it was instant………LOVE!!

  What the doctor told me she would not be able to do…….SHE DID!!.

  I wanted to breast feed her even thought he told me she would have poor muscle tone in her mouth to eat right. Well let me tell you she proved them wrong.!!!

  I don’t know where to start with all the things she has accomplished in her young life. Yes, her reading and writing won’t be par with her peers, but she still tries very hard at this. She has grown up to be a very gifted child. I found her strength’s and have made that her strong point in her life. Which is her love of dance, friend’s, family.

  There are a lot of things that have happened in her life that have been hard for me to understand. Like why at 16 years old, while home alone from school due to menstrual cramps, she decides to call 911, they sent an ambulance to the house, they pick her up, and, she then gets a ride to the hospital in Petaluma…all by herself!!!!!

  Or why she goes completely numb when I am trying to correct her (like most teenagers)
  Or just when everything seems to be going well and she is learning more and more to not lean on me so, she does something that sets her back. At times like these I feel that we need to start all over again.

  And then we move on……….it’s O.K.

  But for all the not so good times, there are so much, much more wonderful, special and even emotional times in our lives together. She has such a trust in everyone that comes in her circle of life. Her love of people out shines everything she can’t do. She has no problem walking up to a man or woman and letting them know how handsome or beautiful they are.

  We were at a Mexican restaurant one evening, as we were eating and listening to a live Mariachi band, 4 young men came and sat down at the table next to us. Well low and behold she starts up a conversation with one of them and then the others join in. As the band starts to play again, Gloria goes and request a dance from one of these guys, (who by the way was about my age!!) and you know what….he did!!!! There she was in all her glory, as everyone else looked on, dancing and having fun!!!!. I would have never, ever have done that!!!! But that what make her so special. We had a wonderful time that night.

  Stuff like this happens all the time, when we are together.

  I have come to admire Gloria Jr. for who she is and not what I want her to become. She has taught me not to judge others by their appearance. She has shown me to be kinder to all I meet. She has given me a big lesson on forgiveness. And she has shown me to be happy everyday.

  For me I see Gloria Jr. as wearing her “spiritual soul” on the outside for all to see and you know what? I want to be just like her.

  “Thank you Lord for giving me your gift of Love”
  My Daughter Gloria Patricia Jr.