Is your teen looking for acceptance online? Watch this video to learn more about teen’s online activity

“Fathers, don’t exasperate your children by coming down hard on them. Take them by the hand and lead them in the way of the Master.” (Ephesians 6:4, The Message)

Everyone craves acceptance. You do. I do. And, even more dramatically, the teens in our lives deeply crave acceptance. They are in a thirst-filled time of their lives when receiving the kind of acceptance they need greatly impacts their future.

Teens and sometimes adults often mistake attention for acceptance. Just because all eyes are on you doesn’t mean the outcome is going to be what you wanted. Teens have a hard time distinguishing the difference between attention and acceptance when all eyes are on them. Attention feels good. Even the wrong kind of attention can masquerade as acceptance and feels good … until the mask is off. Only then does the wrong kind of attention show itself for the thief it is. It steals acceptance. It robs self-worth. It brings the opposite of what the thirsty teen was seeking.

As parents and support adults we need to be aware of this incredible thirst in the teens in our lives. Cell phone access and social media are presenting opportunities for attention that we need to be aware of and to alert our teens to as well.

Because of this deep desire for acceptance teens are being lured into social media posts, viewing sexual content online and even capturing and sharing compromising photos of themselves. This brings them attention dressed as false acceptance. Dark doors of invitation are opening to our kids through these avenues. Through the deceptive idea that sexual actions bring acceptance and through the misguidance of their peers kids are entering a territory where they have no idea of the possible consequences.  Video link.

Keep the doors of communication open with the teens in your life.

Offer attention to the things that interest them.

Offer appreciation for the good choices you see them make and for the good character traits in who they are becoming.

Offer affection that lets them know you care, that they are special to you and also to God. Let them know they are created for this time in history and to impact their world for good.

Draw your kids into things beyond themselves that serve others. Get involved as a family caring about the world around you.

Model the character traits you desire to see them grow in. Keep good boundaries when it comes to cell phone use and using the internet. Take the time to question and monitor what is going on. Have consequences when boundaries are broken and talk, don’t yell, when you see red flags.

Above all, pray for those teens. It’s a fast changing world out there and they need our prayers. Pay attention to your tones and words and create the atmosphere you know will help keep communication open.

If communication has slammed shut with your teen, get help. Don’t settle for silence. Don’t assume it’s just a stage kids go through. Talk to those who can guide you in breaking down the walls that have come up.

Dear Lord,

Thank you for  _______________, the teen(s) in my life. Thank you that You have created them uniquely and for this specific time and place in history. Father, grant me grace to love them gently but firmly, to stand strong in my convictions, not to come down hard on them but to seek Your heart on all the issues that seem to tangle us up. Please show me how to give attention, appreciation and affection in a way that they will receive. Help me to be an example they can look up to. Please soften their hearts toward me and open their hearts to Your love. Thank you, Lord, that You alone can safeguard this child’s heart from the snares of this world. I ask for Your wisdom. Thank you. I pray this in the strong name of Jesus, Amen.

Forty to sixty percent of 16-18 year olds participate in sexual activity online. They have no idea who could be watching. Please share this video with your social network.