Getting Over the Holiday Blues
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This is supposed to be a season of joy and happiness, but many people don’t feel it. Many people suffer from bouts of depression or the blues at different times during the year. During the holiday season people encounter memories of loved ones they have lost through death or divorce or friends who have moved away. People experience stress and difficult family reunions over the holidays. Depression is a growing problem. In fact, psychologists have said that we live in an “age of depression”.
There are many causes for this mood disorder. Reasons for depression range from grief, divorce, major changes, lack of sunlight or physical exercise, a general disappointment with life or friends, low self-worth, relationship, spiritual or anger problems, false beliefs about life and God, trauma from the past, deficiency of neurological chemicals and more.
What are some of the symptoms of depression? Check to see if you have been experiencing any of these symptoms:
- Loss of appetite. Weight gain or loss.
- Depressed affect. Children & Adolescents: cranky, irritable, angry/explosive outbursts.
- Diminished interest in or enjoyment of activities.
- Psychomotor agitation or retardation.
- Sleeplessness or hypersomnia.
- Lack of energy.
- Poor concentration and indecisiveness.
- Social withdrawal.
- Suicidal thoughts and/or gestures.
- Feelings of hopelessness, worthlessness, excessive or inappropriate guilt.
- Low self-esteem.
- Unresolved grief issues.
- Hallucinations or delusions.
If you have 3 or more of the above symptoms which have lasted for over 2 weeks, you should seek medical help or professional counseling. You can find a counselor or go to the nearest mental health center.If you are suicidal please contact 911 (in the USA or Canada) or go to a hospital emergency room.
How do you move beyond depression?
Usually people who are feeling depressed are not doing what would help them feel better.
- Talking about your feelings with someone is very beneficial. Exploring with someone, especially a counselor, what is underlying your feelings can help you begin to problem-solve.
- Seeing your doctor for a physical exam and telling him/her about your depression can lead to further treatment for physiological causes. You may need to consider taking an anti-depressant.
- Regular exercise and proper diet, spending time with family and friends and reaching out to others is very helpful. Seeking a relationship with God and praying to Him brings hope and encouragement when you are feeling down-hearted.
If you or someone you know are trying these activities and still stuck in depression, it is wise to seek out professional Christian counseling.
Is there a spiritual dimension to depression?
Is there a spiritual dimension to depression that gets overlooked when we rush into taking medication? In other words, in our effort to “hurry up and feel good” do we possibly miss out on important lessons that God might be wanting to teach us? There most certainly is always a spiritual dimension to depression. In the book of Psalms in the Bible, David, one of the Kings of Israel wrote:
Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.
Most people who walk in my office feeling depressed are spiritually hungry. Many have a general sense of distance from or disappointment with God. They struggle with periods of doubt about God’s love for them and begin to question whether He will help them through their problems. Some people express anger towards God wondering, “how a good God can allow suffering?”. Or they question whether God exists. This spiritual vacuum can actually be the basis for some of the hopelessness and despair they feel.
Depression is a complex disorder.
Since human beings are very complex it is necessary to address all the underlying causes of depression such as: low self-esteem, losses, physical pain, relationship or financial issues, guilt, shame, trauma, dysfunctional family issues, along with the spiritual and physiological reasons.
Medication can give people more motivation and energy to get through a depressive period in their life but it will not be a cure-all for depression. One must take steps to fight depression on all fronts: spiritually, mentally, physically, emotionally and relationally.
The great news for this holiday season and throughout the year is that God does exist and whether you realize it right now or not, he loves you very much. You are not in this alone. If you are looking for someone you can place your trust in, a foundation to build upon, you can find that safe place whether you’re in a relationship right now or not. Place your trust in God and his promises. Anchor your life to the hope that he brings.
He is the well deep enough to draw from when you need peace, hope and wisdom, insight and love, endurance and faith. He gave His Son Jesus Christ to die on the cross for all our sins. Everyone feels unworthy sometimes, but God thinks you’re worth it—even worth the death of His Son.
You can receive Christ right now by faith through prayer. Praying is simply talking to God. God knows your heart and is not so concerned with your words as He is with the attitude of your heart. Here’s a suggested prayer:
Lord Jesus, I want to know you personally. Thank you for dying on the cross for my sins. I open the door of my life to you and ask you to come in as my Savior and Lord. Take control of my life. Thank you for forgiving my sins and giving me eternal life. Make me the kind of person you want me to be.
Does this prayer express the desires of your heart? You can pray it right now, and Jesus will come into your life, and forgive you of your sins forever, just as he promised.
I lost my son Dec. 15, 2005 in a car accident. The first year was extremely difficult with Christmas approaching and I had just buried my first born child. Most of the time I am a very upbeat, happy, and positive person, however I have noticed each year starting in October (Oct. 13th son’s birthday) I begin to experience an emotional roller coaster until after the holidays are over. I have a husband, daughter and three grandchildren that I love dearly but I just don’t want to celebrate the holidays. I prefer to go somewhere else, anywhere but home. I feel guilty that I don’t want to stay home during what should be the most joyous occasions. Due to a family disagreement several years ago the holiday gatherings are divided and that is another reason I just want to go on vacation away from all the drama. I pray for peace, love and forgiveness!
Dear Lisa,
Sorry about the loss of your children.
It is only a mother that can understand what it means to lose a child. I can imagine what you are going through though I may not understand. It may take you sometime to settle after the loss. It is right to feel the way you feel particularly in your current state. Mourning can take a while but you will be over it. Only that do not allow it to take a toll on you! Even though you have lost the children, enjoy the company of those that God has left you with. Enjoy the company of your grandchildren too. If you decide to mourn for too long, you may eventually let the devil torment you with guilt and ungodly thoughts. You can decide through the help of God to move on, trust God to take care of all your needs, fears and anxieties. If you need someone to talk too, you can click on the button ‘Talk to a mentor’ above.
I have never lost a child but, I lost a sister and 2 brothers. My sister had 8 children. 6 of them are now “grown” and the youngest 2 still live with me. Family get togethers are almost impossible which makes the holidays stressful and depressing. Unfortunately the children suffer the most. They want to see their families but it always leads to unpleasant fighting and arguments. God has become the center of my life but this is not a peace I have been able to share with all of my family. I love that you are not just helping treat the symptoms but getting to the root of the problem, a need for Jesus in your life! Maybe I can get some of my family to read it!
Tricia you are so right…having God at the center of your life does get to the root of the problem!I’m so sorry to hear that your family get togethers are so stressful. Unfortunately hurting people hurt others and I am sure that these children are all missing their parents which they are reminded of when they get together with the rest of the family.