A Cinderella Story

I grew up wanting to get married and live happily ever after, just like Cinderella. When Charlie proposed to me, I carefully laid the groundwork for my dream. “I’m going to put you first in my life,” I said. “Will you put me first in your life?” He said he would. But, literally, as soon as the honeymoon was over, all Charlie’s courting stopped. He felt now he could focus on his career, and he did. I felt disappointed and left out. For the next 12 years, I courted him, trying to get him to love me the way I wanted to be loved. But the harder I tried, the more he pulled away.

Depression set in

I grew depressed, even as Charlie’s career skyrocketed. I was excited for him when he began training to go to the moon, and I involved myself with the flight as much as possible. But I was really looking forward to it being over. Inside I was thinking, When he gets this goal behind him, he’ll put me first.

But he didn’t. He still had that workaholic impulse. He still pursued a list of goals and I was still way down on his list. I considered divorce but I wondered if any man could love me the way I wanted to be loved. Was there even such a thing as the perfect marriage? It didn’t look like it anymore.

So I began to look for other things to fulfil me. I tried a career. I tried church work. I volunteered with the Head Start program and helped the needy. Nothing worked.

I’ll admit it – I even tried drugs. When the marijuana didn’t work either, I thought, Maybe there IS no purpose in life. You just live and die and that’s all there is. That’s when I began to think about suicide. I lost all hope. Doesn’t that seem strange? I was married to a famous man, had a nice home and healthy children, plenty of money, yet I had no hope.

I’ll try God, then

And to think that I was a church-goer! Always had been. But I had no faith. I thought all religions were the same and that Jesus was no different than Mohammed or Buddha. They all existed just to teach us to love one another, I reasoned. Now I wondered if even God existed. I was attending church and teaching Sunday School but I didn’t believe a word of it.

Then our church hosted a “spiritual renewal weekend.” Charlie and I listened as guests told first-hand stories of how Jesus makes a difference in their lives. I’d never heard such testimonies before. They claimed that Jesus answered prayer – something I’d never seen happen in my life. I saw a love and joy in these folks that I surely didn’t have.

Since I’d tried everything else, I decided to try God. I told Him I didn’t know if He was real and I didn’t know if Jesus was the Son of God. But I didn’t want to be in charge of my life any more.

I woke up the next morning with a commitment: I wouldn’t look to anyone but God for fulfillment. Not even to Charlie. I began praying for things and I got answers! “That’s just lucky,” I’d think. Then it would happen again. Pretty soon I was convinced God existed and He answered prayer! I had been in church all my life and now I was finding it was all true!

Forgiveness and healing

I also discovered God wanted to make some changes in me. I sensed He wanted me to forgive Charlie for the long list of hurts I nurtured. My first reaction was, “No way!” But how could I call Jesus my Lord and not obey? So I made the attempt, feeling it wasn’t even possible. But over a two-month period, God freed me of my anger and helped me love Charlie unconditionally.

All these years I’d been loving Charlie so he’d love me back. Now, with God’s help, I sought to love Charlie 100 per cent, whether he loved me back or not.

Now I know what a dreadful mistake I made, putting Charlie first all those years. Today, God comes first. He’s taken away my depression, healed our marriage and given me a reason for living. And while life certainly isn’t a fairy tale, God’s love has satisfied my deepest hunger for meaning and purpose in life.

Have you ever felt like a failure? Would you like Jesus to help restore your identity? If you don’t know Jesus, we encourage you to pray the following:

Lord Jesus, I want to know You personally. Thank You dying on the cross for my sins. I open the door of my life and receive You as my Savior and Lord. Thank You for forgiving my sins and giving me eternal life. Take control of my life. Make me be the person You want me to be. Amen.

2 Responses to “A Cinderella Story”

• Loading comments
• Christabel says:

  January 18, 2016 at 3:37 pm

  Step sister were nice .cinderella had a brother

• Sharon says:

  January 19, 2016 at 11:18 am

  thank you for posting this wow good story on how this person went from the husband had to be first to God being first I enjoyed this thanks again