This is part 4 of an eight part series – Reflections for a Bride

One challenge as you get to know one another in marriage is that you eventually find out there are “warts.” Suddenly you find some imperfection,a spot that you wish would disappear. Maybe you knew that it was there, and hoped he would never see it.

How do you respond to warts? If they are your own, maybe you’d like to hide them, to pretend they are not there. Maybe explaining them away is your style. “My mother has a wart just like this, and so does my sister. It’s normal.” Comparison is a frequent option for some; “Yes, I’ve got imperfections, but you should see his!”

Your response may be dictated by the type of “wart.” Is it some quirk of personality or temperament? Do you bounce out of bed each morning, and just assume he knows about it? Learning to know yourself is a good thing. Learning to know your differences within the marriage, while appreciating how you were created, can be a challenge and a blessing to both of you.

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Is your “wart” an area where you need to grow? Balancing a checkbook can be challenging for some; meal planning, taxes or punctuality may be a growth area for others. When you find a weak area,don’t be afraid to learn and grow. If it’s something you need help with, ask your spouse or a friend to assist you. Community schools or a local church may offer classes, and learning along with others may work well for you. You can also find excellent resources online or in your local library.

Many young couples have found encouragement in getting together with an older couple they respect. You may find they have faced struggles similar to those you are now faced with, and have learned lessons that they’re willing to share.

Do you struggle with mistakes you’ve made in the past and things you regret doing? God wants to help you. Acknowledge those areas, confess these things to God (and perhaps to your spouse or others), and ask Him to give you the strength to change. Consider asking a trusted friend to pray with and for you. If there is an area of difficulty in your life,consider asking a trustworthy friend, pastor or study coach for insight and accountability.

In facing your own warts, it’s vital to remember the truth expressed in the song many of us have known since childhood: “Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so.” He loves you as you are, and sees you as who you could become, dear one. No matter what you have or haven’t done, His love for you runs deep and strong.

May you find that within your marriage you have a safe place to learn and grow!

Next: Handle with Love