Bullying: Silence Kills
I turned on CNN this morning and there was more news of bullying and suicide and it broke my heart. Bullying sometimes gets passed off as just a part of growing up. But for many young people, they won’t get the chance to grow up. For them, bullying cost them everything. I know how they feel – I was almost one of them.
A friend on Facebook linked me to a video of Ellen DeGeneres addressing the bullying on her show. Just a few seconds into watching it I started to cry. This could have been me. I got bullied for a different reason, but I’m pretty sure the pain feels the same. I came to the same conclusion these kids came to. The bullies made me hate myself and that is a terrifying place to be.
The tears came as a surprise, I didn’t realize that the pain was still so raw so many years later. I read somewhere that the damage of bullying never goes away and I wonder if that’s true. Ellen said, “This needs to be a wakeup call to everyone that teenage bullying and teasing is an epidemic in this country and death rate is climbing. One life lost in this senseless way is tragic. Four lives lost is a crisis.” It’s not overstating the point. Bullying is a crisis and it’s one that is often suffered in silence.
If you or someone you know is being bullied talk to someone. I didn’t and my silence almost cost me everything. Years later I found out that help was right there I just didn’t know it. All I had to do was open my mouth. I know it’s not easy, but it’s easier than this. I didn’t tell my parents because I figured that you had to go to school. I didn’t realize that if they’d known my parents would have home schooled me, or looked into private school or sent me to school in another district. I had options I just couldn’t see them.
Eventually I did transfer to another high school and everything changed. I came home that first day and when my Mom asked how it went I told her “no one was mean to me today” with a surprised look on my face. I had no idea school could be like that. I remember talking to my older brother about the possibility of switching schools. I was afraid and when he asked why I said, “what if I get there and it’s worse?” I remember him looking over at me and asking, “Claire, how could it possibly be worse?”
Reading the reports on the news today, I see how it could have been worse. We didn’t have Facebook when I was in high school. Thank God for that. I’m not sure I would have survived that. At the end of her video Ellen gives some of the best advice I’ve heard since this debate hit the news cycle. She said, “Things will get better . . .and you should be alive to see it.”
I shudder to think of all I would have missed out on if I had carried through with my plans. You can read my story and see what it was that quite literally saved my life. If you are being bullied or if you just need someone to talk to we have mentors available 24/7. Just use this form to send in a request and your mentor will contact you, usually in a few days. If you need to talk to someone right now and feel that you might be a danger to yourself call 1 800 SUICIDE to get help immediately. Suicide is a permanent reaction to what is often a temporary situation. I know it hurts, and I know it’s not easy but if you can just survive high school it gets so much better. I promise.
If you want to understand yourself better try our free Life Lesson: How do you define yourself? You’ll be matched with a study coach who will walk with you as you learn.
Here is a organization who started in the church and now is doing school assemblies across the nation. Addresses the issue of bullying and making good choices. They have performed in over 7000 schools and considered the #1 assembly in the nation. Check out their site at http://www.omegamanschools.com
Making a huge impact with our kids!