Student Profile: Christina Talks About Life
life lessons | laughing and loving | family | heartbreak | spirituality
Learning about life in university:
>University brings the challenge to live out of my comfort zone — everything is unfamiliar because my parents have for so many years set the guidelines I live by. And suddenly I have to learn everything and make all the decisions. But I like the freedom of being able to make your own choices.
I’m learning so many things! I’m learning there’s more to life than schoolwork, and there is such a thing as relationships! I’m learning to have more realistic expectations from people. One of my closest friends I lived with this year got a boyfriend, and spent more time on him than with friends, so that strained our relationship. A lot of the anger I had towards her turned into acceptance and understanding of the situation and understanding of how she felt and what she was struggling with. I’m learning to live by choices rather than feelings, and to not let situations totally absorb and control me.
>For me, to "just be yourself" means having the freedom to do what I want to do, to laugh when I think something’s funny and not care if people are going to make fun of my laugh.
I would love to meet Mother Theresa because she had such an incredible love for people she sacrificed and served people beyond the norm. She lived out her faith in such incredible ways.
If I have time, I love to bake. I like playing too: playing soccer, playing piano, playing sports and playing music. I also like to quiet down and journal my thoughts and experiences.
My favourite tunes or type of music: worship music, soft rock, pop and dance
Food I would consider dying for: chocolate ice cream.
My father made a deep impression on me by reaching out to love me at a crucial moment that was completely going out of his comfort zone because he hasn’t experienced that from his own parents.
With the help of a counsellor, I discovered I had been emotionally abandoned by my father as a child. He was aware of that and knew it was having influence on his children. I knew he was dealing with issues of his own. It was the most vulnerable moment when I told him; he listened very quietly, hugged me and told me he loved me and was sorry. As I was dealing with the emotions, God showed me his love for me at the same time.Now I don’t have as hard a time telling him what I’m struggling with and be open with my feelings. And I’m not afraid of being rejected, or that he won’t be able to love or affirm me.
>It was a crappy weekend for my fiancé and I. Issues came up that we had struggled with our whole relationship. That weekend my fiance began to question our relationship. The following week we began discussing our relationship; he asked us to be completely honest with ourselves.
I knew that God had prepared me for this conversation. Just six weeks before, I was at a conference where I actually experienced God’s love and was reaffirmed in his love for me, reassuring me that God would give me the strength to handle anything that was coming my way.
I spent the day before just talking with God and praying. I struggled with God and finally gave up the state of my relationship to him. I gave up the fear that we wouldn’t get married, which had driven me throughout our whole relationship.
So that evening I voiced what I was too afraid to voice before. I voiced things I had said before that had bounced off a brick wall. I felt too young to be engaged at 20 and wasn’t feeling ready to be a mother. I wanted to go to college, and I wanted to travel.
He asked me what I thought we should do. That was the crunch point. I knew that at that point if we didn’t say no, there was no turning back. Then I said the the hardest words I’ve spoken in my entire life, "No I don’t think we should get married." In that moment I felt a freedom and joy that I didn’t know. I was in a cage until I released my fear, said what I knew, and made the decision that I knew needed to be made.
Christina’s experience of healing and overcoming her fantasy world . . .
Related reading:
- Are you deliberately designed for a greater purpose?
- Can you state your life purpose in a sentence?
- Quench your thirst for real and satisfying relationships
- Back to student profiles
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